r/AITApod • • Mar 17 '26

SUBREDDIT UPDATES: No Paragraphs = Deleted, and Automod Now Backs Up Posts

32 Upvotes

We have upgraded the subreddit.

Now that posts are automatically backed up by the automod, we will be annihilating submissions that lack paragraphs so OP can add them. Seriously, we can't read that. Get it into a google doc and write something for humans. WE LOVE YOU.

Thank you for your time. YTH (you're the hero)


r/AITApod • • Apr 26 '26

Subscriber Goal Welcome to r/AITApod!

12 Upvotes

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r/AITApod • • 11h ago

AITA for making my husband replace 15 meals after he gave half my meal prep to his sister?

5.3k Upvotes

AITA for making my husband replace 15 meals after he gave half my meal prep to his sister?

Every month I spend a full Sunday doing meal prep for us. I plan out the recipes the week before and do one big grocery run on Saturday, usually about $190. Then Sunday morning to Sunday night I’m in the kitchen cooking and portioning everything into containers. 30 meals go into the chest freezer, all labeled, and that’s what we eat on weeknights for the month.

My husband’s sister had her baby a few weeks ago. She came over last Thursday with the baby so we could finally meet her. I was still at work when she got there.

When I got home my husband told me his sister looked really exhausted and he’d packed up a bunch of the meals from the freezer and sent her home with them so she wouldn’t have to worry about cooking for a while. I said that was really sweet and didn’t think anything of it.

Monday I went to grab dinner and half the freezer shelf was empty. I went through the labels and counted. He’d given her 15 of the 30.

I asked him why he didn’t check with me first. He said she needed them right then and we still had enough to get through 2 weeks. I told him that’s not really the point, I spent a full day making those and now I have to do the whole thing over again in the middle of the month which I have literally never had to do.

He offered to help me make more this weekend. He’s never made a single meal in 4 years. I’ve never once seen him use anything in the kitchen besides the coffee maker and the microwave.

I told him he’s replacing all 15 himself. I’ll buy the groceries and write out every recipe but he’s the one cooking them. He gave away an entire day of my work and he can find out what that actually takes.

His mom called me that night to say I’m being petty over some damn food. AITA?


r/AITApod • • 10h ago

AITA for trading my MILs house key for a garage key after she kept rearranging my kitchen?

2.8k Upvotes

My husband’s mom has had a key to our house since we bought it 3 years ago, for emergencies. She retired this spring and over the summer she started letting herself in on Tuesdays while we’re at work to drop off food, usually soup or enchiladas, which is really nice of her.

Every time she comes something in the kitchen moves though. My pans are in the drawer under the oven now and she redid the spice cabinet by size. What actually bothers me is my mom’s recipe box. My mom passed when I was 25 and most of the cards are in her handwriting, it’s sat by my stove in every apartment I’ve had and MIL keeps putting it up on top of the fridge where I need the step stool to reach it.

Back in September I brought it up, that we love the food but please just leave the kitchen how it is. She thought that was funny, she said I’d thank her once I could find stuff. The next Tuesday the box was on the fridge AGAIN.

My husband wanted to just take the key back but I didn’t want her to stop coming over, I think she’s kind of lonely. Our second fridge is out in the garage and the side door has its own key. So when she came for dinner Sunday I traded her the garage key for the house one and told her she can drop food off anytime as long as it goes in that fridge. We don’t park in there and the door from the garage into the kitchen has a deadbolt.

She was pretty quiet the rest of dinner. On her way out she told my husband “I didn’t know I was the delivery guy now.”

Yesterday there were 2 containers of chili in the garage fridge. She’d also gone through every shelf out there. The paint cans are lined up by color now and my husband’s screws are in old pasta sauce jars by size, he spent half an hour last night looking for his tape measure.

He thinks it’s pretty funny, he says the garage has never looked this good.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 4h ago

AITA for refusing to cover for my wife after she made plans without telling me?

501 Upvotes

I’m 35M, married to my wife (33F) for seven years. We have two kids, ages 5 and 7. A few weeks ago, my wife told me she had agreed to help her sister move on a Saturday. I said that was fine, but reminded her that I had already promised our kids I’d take them to a science museum that day. She said she’d only be gone for a couple of hours and would be home before lunch. Saturday came, and she texted me around 9 AM saying her sister needed more help than expected. Then another text came saying she probably wouldn’t be home until late afternoon. I ended up taking both kids to the museum alone, which was fine. What bothered me was that she apparently knew the night before that her sister had rented a moving truck and would need help all day, but she never told me. That evening, her sister called while we were having dinner and casually thanked me for being so understanding about the whole move. I said, I wasn't really given much choice. My wife immediately looked annoyed. After her sister hung up, my wife told me I should have just smiled and let it go. She said her sister already felt guilty about taking up her Saturday and didn't need to hear me complain about it. I told my wife I wasn't complaining about helping her sister. I was upset that she made a commitment that affected our family schedule without actually discussing it with me. Then she said something that really bothered me I knew you'd say no, so I didn't ask. I told her that's exactly why I'm angry. Now she's saying I made her look bad in front of her sister and that I should have covered for her instead of admitting I was annoyed. I don't think spouses should make plans for each other and then expect the other person to pretend everything was fine.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 3h ago

AITA for telling my stepson why I stopped coming to his football games?

149 Upvotes

I've been married to my wife for five years. Her son is 15 and I've been going to his football games since he was 10.

His biological dad was mostly absent until recently. He started attending games again this season but apparently told my wife he felt uncomfortable having me there.

My wife asked if I could skip a few games so they could rebuild their relationship. I didn't agree with it, but I stayed home because I didn't want to make things harder for her son.

Last week my stepson asked why I stopped coming and whether I'd lost interest in his football. I told him the truth, that his mom had asked me to give his dad some space.

He got upset and confronted her. Now he's refusing to invite his biological dad to his next game and says he'd rather have me there.

My wife is furious because she thinks I deliberately made her look bad and ruined months of progress between them. She said I should've just told him I was busy.

I told her I wasn't going to let him think I stopped caring about something that's important to him.

AITA?

TL;DR: My wife asked me to stop attending my stepson's football games to accommodate his biological dad. I told him why I'd been absent, and now he doesn't want his dad attending.


r/AITApod • • 8h ago

AITA for refusing to share my inheritance with my cousin after she said I didn't deserve it?

352 Upvotes

My grandmother left me a small amount of money in her will and I honestly wasnt expecting anything, so it meant a lot to me

My cousin was upset when she found out because she assumed everything would be split equally between the grandchildren. She got even angrier when I explained that Grandma had made her own decision

A few days later she called me and said I should give her half because she has more expenses than I do. I told her I wasnt going to do that, especially after the way she'd spoken to me

Now some relatives are saying I should share the money to keep the peace, while others think my cousin is being entitled

I loved my grandmother and this money feels personal to me, not just something to divide up

AITA for keeping the inheritance my grandmother chose to leave me?


r/AITApod • • 54m ago

AITA for telling my dad's girlfriend that I've been writing his romantic texts?

• Upvotes

My dad is 63 and started dating again after being single for years. He's terrible at texting, so when he met his current girlfriend, he started asking me for help replying to her messages.

At first it was harmless stuff like arranging dates or figuring out what to say when she complimented him. Eventually he started asking me to write longer messages, including some pretty romantic ones.

They've been together for about six months now. Last weekend she mentioned they're discussing moving in together and told me how much she loves that my dad always knows exactly what to say.

I felt weird hearing that because I've written at least 20 of those messages. I told her privately that I'd been helping him with his texts.

She was shocked and asked if she'd essentially been flirting with me this whole time. I explained that the feelings were his, I just helped with the wording.

She confronted him and they're now taking a break. Dad is furious and says I screwed him over something completely harmless.

I probably should've stopped helping him months ago, but I also felt she deserved to know.

AITA?

TL;DR: Helped my dad write romantic messages to his girlfriend during stake sessions. Told her when they started discussing moving in together, and now their relationship is in trouble.


r/AITApod • • 7h ago

AITApod AITA for refusing to give my younger sister our grandma’s ring after what she said about me?

141 Upvotes

I (20F) am a uni student. My grandma passed away two years ago and left me her gold ring with a small pearl. It’s not super expensive or anything, but it means the world to me because we were really close. My younger sister (19F) got engaged recently. She and her fiancé are pretty young and broke, so they’re trying to do everything on a tight budget. Last week at family dinner out of nowhere my sister asked if I’d just hand over grandma’s ring so her fiancé wouldn’t have to spend money buying one. I was honestly shocked and just said no, explaining that grandma gave it to me and I’m keeping it. She instantly got annoyed and said I don’t even need it anyway since I’m “just a student” and won’t be getting married anytime soon. Then she added that the ring is just sitting in my drawer doing nothing while she’s starting a “real adult life” and actually needs it.
That really got me. I work hard at uni and take my future seriously, so having her act like my life hasn’t started yet was pretty offensive. I told her that after disrespecting me like that my answer is a hard no.
She threw a fit and left and now she’s telling everyone in the family that I’m being selfish and petty over a silly comment. My brother texted me saying I’m taking it too personally and should just give her the rind to keep the peace.

AITA for sticking to my no?


r/AITApod • • 7h ago

AITA for refusing to cook a separate meal for my sister-in-law every time she visits?

114 Upvotes

My brother and his wife come over to our parents' house almost every weekend. I enjoy cooking and sometimes make food for everyone when I'm there

The problem started when my sister-in-law began criticizing whatever I made. If I cooked chicken, she'd complain it was too spicy. If I made something mild, she'd say it was bland. At first I tried adjusting things to make her happy

Last Sunday I made biryani for everyone and she barely touched it. Later she told my brother that next time I should make something she actually likes. He asked me to prepare a separate dish for her whenever I cook

I said she's welcome to bring something she enjoys or make her own meal, but I wasn't going to cook two different dinners every weekend. My brother said I was being rude over something simple

My parents think I should just accommodate her because she's a guest, but I feel like my efforts are never appreciated anyway

AITA for refusing to make a separate meal for my sister-in-law?


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

AITA for telling my neighbor's Airbnb guests I'm not responsible for them?

3.9k Upvotes

My neighbor rents out his house on Airbnb whenever he's away. A few months ago he asked if I could help one guest get inside because the lockbox wasn't working. I was home anyway so I did.

Last week a couple knocked on my door around 11pm because they couldn't figure out the heating. Apparently my neighbor had included instructions telling guests to knock on my door if they needed assistance.

I had no idea about this. When I called him he said he thought I wouldn't mind since I'd helped before.

I told the guests I wasn't involved with the rental and couldn't help them. I also asked my neighbor to remove those instructions immediately.

He did, but he's annoyed because the guests complained about the lack of assistance in their review. He said I could've just shown them how the thermostat worked rather than making the situation worse.

I probably could've helped since I was already awake, but I don't see how one favor turned into me being responsible for his business.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

AITA for leaving an escape room after my friends told me to stop solving the puzzles?

2.2k Upvotes

Six of us booked an escape room for my friend's birthday. I've done quite a few before, so during the first 10 minutes I managed to find two keys and figure out a combination lock.

The birthday girl joked that I should leave some puzzles for everyone else. Fair enough, so I backed off and let the others take over.

About halfway through, another friend told me I should just stop touching things because I was making it less fun for everyone. I thought she was joking but she was serious.

So I sat on a bench for a while watching them struggle with stuff I'd already figured out. Eventually I got annoyed and asked the staff to let me out. I waited in the lobby until they finished.

They didn't manage to escape and afterward everyone was annoyed with me for walking out. The birthday girl said I could've just stayed and watched since it was her birthday.

I get that I was probably moving too fast at first, but I also paid to be there and didn't think it was fair to expect me to sit quietly for the rest of the game.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 16h ago

AITA for refusing to switch shifts with my coworker after finding out why she needed the time off?

362 Upvotes

I’m a 30-year-old man and work at a small hotel. My schedule is usually pretty predictable, and I’ve been working the same weekend shift for almost a year. One of my coworkers, jenny recently asked if I could switch one of my Saturday shifts with her. She said she had something important to attend and would really appreciate the favor. I initially said no because I already had plans that weekend. Nothing major, but I had bought tickets months ago and had arranged everything around that date. jenny was disappointed but said she understood. A couple of days later, I found out that the event she wanted to attend was her younger sister’s graduation. She hadn’t told me because she apparently felt embarrassed asking people to rearrange their schedules for a family event. I started feeling guilty and reconsidered. I asked whether she still needed the shift covered, and she said yes. The problem was that by then I had already asked my manager for the day off, and my manager had rearranged the schedule specifically because I couldn't work that Saturday. Switching again would mean another coworker would have to cover part of the shift. I told Jenny I couldn't change it anymore. She said she understood, but later told another coworker that she was disappointed because apparently I had chosen concert tickets over something important to her family. Now I feel like I’m being made out to be selfish for keeping plans I made months in advance. At the same time, I keep thinking that if I had known from the beginning that it was her sister’s graduation, maybe I would have handled things differently.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 17h ago

AITA for refusing to let my adult son use my car after he kept returning it with an empty gas tank?

311 Upvotes

I’m a 47 year-old mom, and my son is 23. He lives about 30 minutes away and occasionally asks to borrow my car when his is being repaired or when he has a longer trip. I’ve never had a problem lending it to him, but there’s one rule I’ve always asked him to follow return it with roughly the same amount of gas it had when he took it. For the last few months, he’s ignored that rule almost every time. I’ll lend him the car with a full tank, and he’ll return it with the fuel light on. When I bring it up, he always says he forgot or that he was in a hurry. Last weekend, he asked to borrow it again for a two day trip. I said no unless he agreed to refill it before bringing it back. He got annoyed and said I was treating him like a child over something ridiculously small. I told him it isn’t about the gas money. It’s about respecting something that belongs to someone else. He said I was being difficult and that parents are supposed to help their kids when they need it. I ended up keeping the keys and told him he could use the car again once he showed me he could return it responsibly. Now my sister says I’m being petty over a tank of gas and should just help my son without making everything into a lesson.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

AITA for taking my ladder back from my partners dad after I found it set up at his neighbors house?

4.2k Upvotes

I (28M) bought a 28 foot extension ladder about a year ago. Cost me around 380 dollars. I use it for gutter cleaning and a few things around the house, nothing crazy but I think I need it a couple times a month at least.

About 3 weeks ago my partner (26F) asked if her dad could borrow it for an afternoon to clean his gutters. I said sure. He came by and got it that same day.

After about a week I texted her asking when it’s coming back. She checked with him and the answer was he’s almost done, just the back of the house left. Another week went by and I got the same answer. I brought it up a third time and she actually got annoyed at me about it and said she’d handle it but then nothing changed.

Last Saturday I just drove over there myself. His car was in the driveway but nobody came to the door when I knocked. I walked around back and the ladder wasn’t anywhere on his property so I started looking around and then I saw it leaning against his NEIGHBOR’S garage next door like it had been set up there for a while.

I walked over and brought it down. I loaded it in my truck and left.

Her dad called that night upset because apparently I embarrassed him in front of the neighbor by just showing up and taking it without saying anything. My partner wanted to know why I couldn’t have at least given him a heads up or waited one more week.

I told her I’d already been asking for 3 weeks and the whole time he wasn’t even using it himself.

She thinks I went out of my way to make her dad look bad on purpose. I just wanted my own ladder back and honestly I don’t know what I was supposed to do differently because I asked 3 separate times and every time the answer was he’s almost done when he wasn’t even the one using it.


r/AITApod • • 3h ago

AITA for not wanting to give up my seat at my own dinner table?

12 Upvotes

I’m 35M and my wife is 33F. We’ve been married for six years. This sounds stupid, but it turned into a bigger argument than I expected. We have a small dining table with four chairs. A few months ago, one of the chairs broke, so I replaced it with a really comfortable office chair I already had. It doesn't match the others, but honestly I don't care. I work from home and sometimes use it during the day, so it was convenient. My wife hates it. She says it makes the dining area look like an office. I told her I understood, but I like the chair and I'm not buying another one just because it doesn't match. Last weekend we had her parents over for dinner. Before they arrived, she asked me to use one of the regular chairs and put my office chair in another room. I said no. I didn't think it was a big deal, and I wasn't going to sit on an uncomfortable chair for two hours just because her parents were coming over. She got annoyed and said I was being stubborn over something incredibly minor. Her dad ended up taking the office chair because he has back problems, so I used one of the regular chairs anyway. After dinner, my wife told me that I had made her look inconsiderate because she had apparently told her dad beforehand that he could use the comfortable chair. I had no idea she'd promised it to him. I told her that if she'd simply asked me, I probably would have moved it without an argument. What annoyed me was being told what to do at the last minute and then being called selfish when I didn't immediately agree. She says I'm focusing way too much on the chair and completely missing the point. I think she's focusing way too much on what a chair looks like.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 20h ago

AITA for refusing to let my girlfriend use my car after what happened last time?

232 Upvotes

I (30M) have been dating my girlfriend (28F) for almost two years. We live separately, but she stays at my place several nights a week. A few months ago, I let her borrow my car while hers was being repaired. She accidentally left the sunroof open during a rainstorm. The interior was soaked, and while she apologized, I ended up spending several hundred dollars getting it cleaned and some electronics checked. Last week, her car broke down again. She asked if she could borrow mine for a few days. I told her I'd rather drive her wherever she needed to go or help her arrange a rental, but I wasn't comfortable lending her my car again. She got really upset and said I was holding one accident over her head and basically telling her that I don't trust her. I told her this isn't about punishing her. It's my car, and after what happened, I'm simply not comfortable lending it out anymore. She said if I really trusted her, I wouldn't have a problem letting her use it. Now she's barely speaking to me and says I'm making a small mistake from months ago into a permanent judgment about her. I feel like I'm allowed to have a boundary about my own car, but maybe I'm being unnecessarily controlling.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 5h ago

AITA for considering telling my friend’s boyfriend the truth before he proposes?

13 Upvotes

My friend Ashley (24F) and her boyfriend John (24M) have been together for about two years. Before that, they were FWB for a year. I've known her for four years and him for three. He's my friend too.

Ashley wanted a relationship, but John didn't. They slept together the weekend he moved six hours away. Soon afterward, she hooked up with someone else. She denied it then but recently admitted it.

About eight weeks later, Ashley found out she was pregnant. She insisted John was the father and there was no other possibility. He hadn't wanted children but committed to raising the baby with her, and they became a couple.

During the pregnancy, John cheated. Ashley agreed to stay if he moved back. He did, accepting what was essentially a demotion and getting them an apartment. From what I've seen, he's made a real effort as a partner and father.

During her pregnancy, I mentioned in front of both of them that I'd want a paternity test if a child were conceived outside a committed relationship. John said, "Good thing I don't have to worry about that." I didn't directly raise my concerns because Ashley insisted it could only be his, and I didn't know otherwise.

Their relationship remains rocky. Ashley hasn't gotten over his cheating, but I've also witnessed her behaving inappropriately with other men. We've told her to end things if she doesn't want to be with him.

Recently, while very drunk at her birthday outing, Ashley admitted she had slept with multiple people around that period, including John's best friend while she was pregnant. She said she doesn't know who her child's father is. I do NOT know whether John is the biological father; I only know what she told us.

John renewed their lease and is talking about proposing. Meanwhile, Ashley says she's considering leaving once she saves enough money, but doesn't want to move back in with her mother. As far as I know, John knows none of this.

I've stayed quiet because I thought they'd break up anyway and feared how he'd react. He loves the child, and I worry he could react impulsively. I also worry about causing upheaval if the child is his, though that wouldn't erase her admission.

WIBTA if I told John exactly what Ashley said, without claiming the child isn't his?


r/AITApod • • 8h ago

AITA for refusing to give my brother the family photos after he left me out of his wedding?

10 Upvotes

My brother got married a few months ago and I found out afterward that he had asked everyone in the family to take pictures except me. When I asked him about it, he said we hadn't been getting along lately and he didnt want any awkward moments on his wedding day

It hurt more than I expected, but I didnt make a scene or ruin anything for him

Recently my parents arranged a family gathering and asked me to bring the old family photo albums because they wanted to scan the pictures and make copies for everyone. My brother heard about it and asked me to send him all the digital copies too

I told him I'd bring the albums for the family but I wasnt comfortable personally sorting and sending him everything after what happened. He said I was dragging an old issue into something that had nothing to do with the wedding

My parents think I should just let it go because the photos belong to the whole family

AITA for not wanting to do him a favor after he deliberately excluded me?


r/AITApod • • 13m ago

AITA for crying after my boyfriend forgot my birthday but remembered his female best friend's?

• Upvotes

I (23F) have been with my boyfriend (26M) for almost three years.

Last week was my birthday. I wasn't expecting anything expensive, just a little attention from the person I love.

He completely forgot.

No flowers, no dinner, not even a happy birthday until I reminded him that evening.

He apologized and said he'd been stressed with work. I understood, even though it hurt.

But yesterday, I found out he'd organized a surprise dinner for his female best friend's birthday, which is next month.

He'd already booked a restaurant and bought her a gift.

When I asked why he could remember her birthday but not mine, he said I was making unnecessary comparisons and that she was just a friend.

I started crying, and he told me I was being dramatic.

Now he's barely speaking to me because apparently I made him feel like a terrible boyfriend.

I genuinely don't care about expensive gifts. I just wanted to feel important to him.

AITA for getting upset over this?

TL;DR: My boyfriend forgot my birthday but planned a surprise dinner for his female best friend. When I cried, he called me dramatic.


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

AITA for telling my mother in law she can't keep changing things in our house without asking?

1.4k Upvotes

I’m 31M and married to my wife, 29F. We’ve been married for four years and have a good relationship with her family overall. My mother in law lives about 20 minutes away and visits us pretty often. She’s always been helpful, but lately she’s started changing little things around our house whenever she visits. She’ll reorganize our kitchen cabinets, move furniture, replace things she thinks look old, and once even donated a box of my books because she thought we didn’t need them. I’ve mentioned several times that I appreciate her wanting to help, but I’d prefer if she asked before changing or getting rid of things. Last weekend, I came home from work and found that she had completely reorganized the spare room. She had moved my desk into the garage because she thought the room would be more useful as a guest room. I was frustrated and told her she couldn’t make decisions about our house without asking us first. She got offended and said she was only trying to help her daughter and that I was treating her like a stranger in her own daughter’s home. My wife was caught in the middle. She agreed that her mom shouldn't have moved my things, but she also said I could have handled it more gently because her mom genuinely thought she was doing us a favor. I told my mother in law that she is always welcome here, but being welcome doesn't mean she gets to rearrange our home whenever she wants. Now she thinks I’m disrespectful, and my wife says I need to apologize for the way I spoke to her. I don't think I was wrong about the boundary, but maybe I handled it badly.

AITA?


r/AITApod • • 7h ago

AITA for refusing to let my aunt decide what happens to the furniture I bought for our shared house?

6 Upvotes

I live with my dad and aunt while saving money to move out. We split some household expenses, but we each buy our own personal things

Last month I bought a nice armchair for the living room with my own money. My aunt said she loved it, so I didnt think much of it

Yesterday I came home and found she'd given it to her daughter to take to her new apartment. When I asked why she didn't tell me, she said it was just a chair and her daughter needed furniture more than I did

I told her she had no right to give away something she didnt pay for. She said I was selfish because I still have a bed and a sofa to sit on

My dad thinks I should let it go to avoid turning the house into a battleground, but I feel like everyone is ignoring the fact that it was mine

I asked my aunt to get it back and now she's acting like I've insulted her daughter

AITA for making a big deal out of a chair I paid for myself?


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

AITAH for refusing to let my mother in law keep a key to our house?

240 Upvotes

I’m 31F and married to my husband 34M for three years. We recently moved into our first house, and my MIL lives about 15 minutes away. When we moved, she asked for a spare key for emergencies I said I wasn’t comfortable with that because I don’t want anyone entering our house when we aren’t home. My husband initially agreed, but a few weeks later he quietly gave her a key anyway. I found out when I came home early one afternoon and saw her inside. She said she had come over to drop off some food and didn’t think it was a big deal because she had the key. I told my husband I wanted the key back. He said I was making his mother feel unwelcome and that she would never misuse it. The problem is that she has already started using it casually. She once came in while I was working from home without knocking, and another time she moved some things around in our kitchen because she thought they were in the wrong place. I told my husband that this isn't about whether his mom is trustworthy. I simply don't want another person having unrestricted access to our home. He thinks I'm being controlling and making his mother feel like a stranger. I told him that if she needs to come over, she can knock like everyone else. Now he says I'm creating unnecessary drama over a key.

AITAH for insisting that my MIL return the key?


r/AITApod • • 1d ago

advice AITAH for asking for money back after my partner used my card to order Uber Eats daily for the past couple of weeks?

452 Upvotes

So I posted this elsewhere last week, but have been told a few times I should post here.

So a few weeks back I (36M) deleted my credit card from the Uber Eats account my partner (36F) uses. To cut to the chase the spending was too much. Around £30 a time almost every weekday.

I told her I couldn’t afford to be paying so much every month and would be deleting my card from the account.

Yesterday I got my latest statement and noticed that she had re-added my card and there was a whole bunch of transactions to Uber Eats.

I checked the actual UE account and there’s pretty much McDonald’s orders every day of around £30 going back to the day after I had removed my card.

I’ve told her that I expect to be transferred the entirety in time for the payment to be made on the 20th.

She’s saying I’m being unreasonable and that I can just pay the minimum payment.

For clarity, she works from home, I don’t. So, by the time I get back there’s no packaging/evidence to indicate any deliveries have been made.

So today is 20th, and the day I need to pay the bill.

Unfortunately, after a reminder text on Friday, I’ve still not been paid.

I’ve since asked her to leave as it’s my house and I’ll be returning there after work.

Her family reluctantly have agreed to let her stay there temporarily. Whether she goes there or elsewhere is anyone’s guess. There was already friction due to them wanting to hold an intervention over her lifestyle/weight.

I called to ask about reporting it but was pretty much told that due to lack of evidence that I restricted her using the card, it’ll be most likely considered a civil matter.

I did expect this tbh

My colleague went by my house earlier and said her car is gone, so I’ll be going back in a few hours and intend to change the locks.

My main concern now is should I hire a lawyer to pursue this in a civil setting?


r/AITApod • • 9h ago

Girlfriends birthday

5 Upvotes

AITA? This Friday is my girlfriends birthday. She turns 53. We've been dating for 7 years. I live 2hrs away. We drive to see each other every other weekend and have since the beginning.

2 days ago she texted me about her making reservations for dinner at a very fancy restaurant in her hometown. I said sure. I make good money and spending it on a good dinner for her birthday is no problem. Then she said that they were booked up. I simply asked where else she would like to go. Then she started getting after me for not making reservations. She said that it hurt her feelings that I wasn't putting out enough "effort".

That set me off. I tried to remind her that I'm driving 2hrs to see her, I've bought presents for her, a card, AND I've taken her to dinner every year on her birthday since we met and only made reservations maybe one time. Because of the distance, I have to put up a lot of extra effort to keep the relationship going. I find it insulting any time she brings effort up. I feel like she's being bratty and doing a bit of grand standing on her birthday. Am I the asshole for not making reservations?