r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/ArcherVisible5866 • 4h ago

Video New controversial Ad in Ireland about consent

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u/DonnyShutup2019 3h ago

Yes! Literally had this today when visiting my mom. She asked "who wants to give a nan hug?" My son gave her a big hug, my daughter opted not too and gave her a big wave instead and shouted "love ya nana". And my mom respected her decision. Its so simple

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u/aint_exactly_plan_a 1h ago

We taught our daughters from an early age that they get to choose who they hug and who they don't and it's ok to say no if they don't want a hug. The first time my 3 year old said "No thank you" when my mom wanted a hug, my mom put on a big, exaggerated sad face. I said "Nope... we don't do that. If they say they don't want a hug, we respect that and make sure they know it's ok".

I think my mom was taken aback at first but quickly came to see the light. We grew up in the "You have to give everyone hugs if they want one" generation and it was awful.

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u/Darkwoth81Dyoni 27m ago

We grew up in the "You have to give everyone hugs if they want one" generation and it was awful.

I grew up feeling like this for years, but as time goes on I'm almost regretting being as adamant about it as I was. I'm extremely worried that, like many things, some parents will take this to the extreme and allow a small child to be a recluse because of 'consent'. Now my thoughts are towards finding a middle ground. Even a young kid needs to know that rejecting a couple hugs if they are uncomfortable isn't the same as never accepting human contact.

10 years ago? Sure, I was bitchy and didn't want to hug anyone.

Now I regret that I was allowed to be like that. People think I don't want anything to do with them, now.

If I could go back in time I would have hugged everyone WAY more.

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u/mrpaddymelt 2h ago

I defer to fist bumps

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u/ScannerBrightly 1h ago

Plus, then you are in each other's chat.

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u/Cyrax89721 55m ago

The number of people in my life that require hugs is stupid. I'd really just prefer a nod with a "hey" and then we can move on.

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u/introgirlie 2h ago

This is the way. I mean why would anyone want to hug someone who doesn't want it? It's so controlling

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u/Misses_Ding 2h ago

As someone who grew up always having to give hugs and kisses and receive them. I did not want them and often still don't. It's about them. They want it so they'll take it.

5

u/theatermouse 1h ago

and often still don't

The wild thing is, at least for me, I probably would be/would have been more open to hugs etc. now if they hadn't been forced on me when I was younger!!

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u/MooneyOne 2h ago

Damn. I do this to my cat because he’s so cute. Am I the baddie?

3

u/lavendermoonoracle 1h ago

Exactly! If a kid doesn't want to hug or high five or even wave, that's fine! I am an adult and can regulate my feelings.

I saw my cousin recently and her baby started crying because he didn't want to interact with me. She started apologizing, and I was like "You don't need to apologize for a baby crying!" It doesn't hurt my feelings if a baby cries around me lol. It's a baby.

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u/DazzlingAd7021 1h ago

For centuries children (and women) have been seen as the property of their fathers and all the other men in their life tangentially. We're just now coming to grips with the idea that EVERY human being deserves bodily autonomy. 

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u/Fun-Proposal5391 36m ago

The other party not wanting it is part of the point.

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u/definitlyspelledrong 38m ago

I never made my kids hug my parents and it pissed off my parents and you know what they can fuck off

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u/Jolly_Ad1631 2h ago

And what's wrong with that? This advert is addressing a non problem. It should have used a real, more common example.