hi. i (21F) live with my ex boyfriend (22M) and someone else. my boyfriend and i just broke up yesterday. we had been together for a little over a y waste but had broken up a few times for a couple days at most. he is kinda turbulent so our relationship was rocky. anyways!!!! i got a 5 month old kitten less than a month ago. he has been kinda weirdly possessive of her (e.g. getting upset that i would take her with me if i had a 2 month summer internship) lately, even though she’s MY cat. he also has multiple times locked her in his room while he slept (we were together at this point) even though i told him not to. i worried that he was being weird and trying to convince the cat to like him. it worked, because now she goes in his room to hang out.
we broke up because he sexually assaulted me (third offense), so i feel like he definitely lost step-dad privileges. yesterday while he was in class, i was about to leave and noticed he had left his door open. i closed it so my kitten wouldn’t go in. now, today, i saw that he had propped his door open. something of note is that his door naturally swings open, so the only reason i’d think to prop the door open is to make is so if someone closes the door, it’s obvious and intentional.
what do i do? is it bad if i close the door? i want my cat to have access to the entirety of the house because i love her and i know she likes his room, but idk… it feels like he groomed her to like him.
like for example one time a week or two ago i came in and she was in bed with him and she stood up. he was like “noooo i finally got her to sleep with me!!” which made me feel weird because i had a suspicion he was being weird making her spend the night with him. ((especially because i know she gets up in the middle of the night to pee and sometimes poop lol)). so i just feel like he’s being weird and forcing her to do stuff. idk if it’s worth mentioning but he has BPD and gets rly possessive of things sometimes so it made sense he was weird about the fact that my cat is, in fact, mine…. he had said “of course if you moved or if you left for a bit i’d let you take her”… even though it’s my cat… you wouldn’t have to *let* me.
sorry if i was rambling, i’m trying to give a good amount of context.
tl;dr my ex boyfriend used to force my cat to stay in his room. now, he’s started leaving his door open when he leaves so she can come in. i closed his door so she couldn’t get in but don’t know if it’s insane to keep doing that.