r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Reasonable--Care • 3h ago

I just wanted a hot dog My new reality

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I have IBS and therefore have to severly limit my diet. Mind you half the stuff on this list is food I really enjoy eating, or is virtually included in everything 🙃 the universe said you WILL eat that boiled chicken and rice and you WILL LIKE IT

3.0k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/TankApprehensive3053 3h ago

Water is on the menu. It's the only thing on the menu now.

522

u/Reasonable--Care 2h ago

And air for dessert!

61

u/ManSharkBear 1h ago

Sniff the mints on the way out of the restaurant if you're feeling extra fancy

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u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

Don't overindulge on the air. The calories would be killer.

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u/YeshuasBananaHammock 2h ago

Whip it 1st

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u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

12

u/YeshuasBananaHammock 2h ago

Into shape

Shape it up

Its not too late

8

u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

To whip it, whip it good

2

u/Giraffe1317 2h ago

"Whip my air back and forth"

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u/YeshuasBananaHammock 2h ago

Im genX, idk that song! Devo only.

3

u/bloopbloopsplat 1h ago

You could vape flavor

2

u/kenniecakes 1h ago

Like in the movie Spaceballs?!!

0

u/DookieShoez 2h ago

Farts are pretty much air so jot that down.

/s sorry for your sitch 😔

27

u/Actual-Cold-4281 2h ago

Would you like your water frozen or liquid?

29

u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

Fancy frozen water, in a clean glass.

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u/No-End3167 2h ago

An ice water frappe, no whip.

8

u/Bluebutteyfly 2h ago

Imagine if Not even that’s safe

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u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

There is a water allergy. It's on the skin and called aquagenic urticaria. Less than 150 cases worldwide.

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u/Bluebutteyfly 2h ago

Oh heck yea, I read this lady almost died from drinking too much water

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u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

That's different. It's known as water intoxication. That does cause hyponatremia, which is the condition of diluted sodium in blood.

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u/wandernwade 2h ago

One lady actually did die. It was after a contest for a radio station, where they had to drink water and try not to pee. She drank up to two gallons worth.. All to win a Nintendo Wii.

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u/Bluebutteyfly 2h ago

Omg ! Yea I’m not too sure if the lady i remember died, she was just really sick and probably took water to feel better idk but next minute she was rushed off to the hospital

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u/YeahImEmbarrassed 2h ago

Oh she died.. hold your wee for a Wii competition

1

u/AssociateWhole 2h ago

We should probably be worried about things bigger than IBS in that case, I think having rabies nears the top of the list as worst way to die. Water is life, no water is death..

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u/Bluebutteyfly 2h ago

Yes but if it’s a life long thing it can be annoying, my 76 year old mum almost died from diverticulitis and now has to watch what she eats

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u/AssociateWhole 2h ago

I got issues (allergies, crohn’s, IBS) that I know of in at least two generations before me on my maternal side, it most certainly is life altering at the very least, possibly life threatening if not cautious, hopefully your mum is doing much better. Life is weird and so is the human body,

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u/Bluebutteyfly 2h ago

Thankyou yes prior this she had no issues

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u/Logical-Cookie6926 1h ago

Makes you wonder how they survived

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u/vulcansheart 2h ago

Nah, lettuce is good to go. Just no dressing.

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u/kenniecakes 2h ago

But fuck Nestle

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u/TankApprehensive3053 2h ago

oh wait..you typed but, not butt.

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u/Elephunk05 1h ago

Sure I like it with light micro plastics though, JFK Jr makes his too strong

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u/SickkRanchez 10m ago

I've had some sleep for dinner a few times as well.