My kid started kindergarten this year and told me she has no friends. She said the other kids don’t want to play with her and tell each other not to talk to her. She says she plays alone on the playground and even though they eat lunch at the same table, nobody wants to talk to her.

They’re doing spirit week at school and one day is Twin Day. She asked a few kids if they wanted to twin with her and they all said no. Why is there even such a thing as Twin Day? I feel like it makes kids feel excluded.

I reached out to the school and her teacher said she asked my kid, and my kid said everything was fine and she was happy. I explained that my kid doesn’t open up often and she probably didn’t feel comfortable telling her. I never got a response back even though I was told they would follow up with me.

I am so heart broken. My kid is the only child, and her dad and I are divorced. I raised her to be strong and outspoken as I feel like she will need to be in this world, but now I feel like I did too much and she is not liked by others. I don’t know what to do, or if I should even do anything at all and let her figure it out.

Pizza is not burnt. It’s from Prince St Pizza in Chicago and it’s their charcoal crust.

Edit: thank you so much for all the support! I can’t reply to everyone but please know I’m reading all of them and taking all advice into consideration.

My daughter is outgoing and does have a deep desire to be accepted by her peers. She’s the first one to go up to a kid and ask if they want to play. If they say no or ignore her, she used to be able to shrug it off, but now gets more upset/cries and I can see her physically feel defeated. I think because she’s been feeling quite rejected these days.

I also wondered if she could be neurodivergent, but haven’t seen enough signs to take action yet. I will definitely keep this in mind and thank you to all of you who shared your stories.

I spoke with my employer today and I’m able to get Twin Day off if needed. I’ve reached out to a couple of the parents and one said their kid has already paired up and I’m still waiting for another’s response. As her parent, I feel anxious and rejected when I ask the other parents if their kid wants to partner with mine, so I can’t imagine what my 6 yo feels. If she ends up not finding anybody, I will use my free will and take her for manicures, a much needed hair cut, and a fun mother/daughter day. I know struggle is a part of life, and I can’t always be there to bail her out, but I can help my girl out once in a while.

Thanks for reading.

Custard psyduck in milk, edamame

A few years ago, at the age of 59, my father gender transitioned. Our relationship at the time was not good at all, we argued often and I’d threatened to never speak to her again. Then boom she reveals that she was actually a woman. It was… a lot to handle. I am 100% pro trans, it’s just that nobody tells you how difficult it can be to watch someone change so much so quickly. It felt like my dad died and I got a new step mom on the same day. She was like a totally new person. Patient, kind, calm, emotionally in-touch… it’s honestly been amazing. We’ve repaired our relationship more than I ever thought was even possible.

Meanwhile, relations with my extended family began to deteriorate. My family members didn’t all understand or accept the new version of her. They didn’t understand she had always been like this, just under the surface. She decided that she didn’t need the disagreement in her life and cut off just about all of our extended family, including my grandma.

The other day, my grandma died. My mom isn’t going to the funeral, nor should she feel obligated to, but I’m so conflicted about going myself. I loved her so much, she was my grandma after all. But she had so much hate in her heart for lgbt people. She moved from our family church to a different one because our church allowed gay people. It just feels like I’m compromising my morals to go pay my respects and lay her to rest. But I feel like I might really regret it if I don’t go.

Yummy pretzels from my partner and I’s last date night

My dad always used to say he was “not political” and that it was one of the things you do not ask other people about. Over time I have come to learn that basically means “I’m a conservative, but don’t want to say that” as he voted for trump in 2020. We have had so many tearful, screaming conversations over the years about this. I believe all parts of life are inherently political and it’s a privileged stance to “stay out of them”. In the last few years I have moved out of his home and I do not depend on him for anything anymore. With midterms coming up I have been volunteering and very invested in the state of the world. I have felt naturally less close to my dad because of this, and I guess he could sense my distance. He asked me about it last night over text, and I was honest. He blew up on me for letting politics affect our bond, and that is has been his biggest fear and now it’s coming true. I think maybe he needs to actually sit with the reality that YES, POLITICS CAN AFFECT RELATIONSHIPS. What do you girlies think? I am very sad and of course I do love my father, but I am proud of myself for being honest and sticking by my value system.

UPDATE: Tuesday was vault day. Since I changed my computer password and required the authenticator for every login, nothing else has been destroyed. And Blizzard said that if someone was logging in from another location, it would show up in my login history. We are struggling financially and we have 2 cosigned loans so I need to sort out this money situation before anything else.

Breakfast: sausage, egg, and cheese hot pocket and grapes

He's been playing WoW since it came out and I've been playing for 10 years. We usually play together and have a lot of fun. Lately I've been getting into mythic+ though so I will play by myself or with guildies.

He also has severe depression and just wallows in it. He won't come when I invite him places. He will sometimes lay in bed all day. So for the past year I've been trying to do more for myself and go out without him.

The weird things started happening with my character about 2 weeks ago. I reminded him that I was going to the Jonas Brothers concert in DC. He got mad at me and wouldn't talk to me for like a week. I logged in to do some mythics one day when he wasn't talking to me and I noticed my staff (that I crafted) was missing. I went to the item restoration and saw it was destroyed. I thought maybe I accidentally deleted it.

Then the day before the concert he texts me while I'm at work and says I came online and asked him for gold. He said "are you being hacked or do you need to tell me something??" I was like wtf I'm at work. When I logged in I saw that my great vault rewards were missing so I changed my password to both of my emails and my battlenet account.

Then the day of the concert while I was at work again he said that someone was on my account. When I got on my account the next day all of my characters gear was gone off of my two mains. Some gear was vendored and some was destroyed. I was so frustrated I wanted to cry. I changed my passwords again and got the authenticator so that whenever my account is logged in it comes up on my phone and I have to approve it. I got my gear back through item restoration and all seemed fine for a few days.

Then he got mad at me again because I still use my nickjlover email for some things like gaming snd junk email. The next day after he got mad at me all of my gear from one character was destroyed again. Not sold but just destroyed.

I think it was him because we know each other's computer password. And my battlenet stays logged in on my computer. When I put a ticket in to Blizzard support they said that there was no suspicious activity on my account. And my bank account and credit cards are fine. Since this last time I changed my computer password without telling him and I am not staying logged in to my battlenet. When I have to go to work again I'm going to see if my gear gets deleted while I'm gone. And if it doesnt then I might ask if hes been doing it.

Strawberry banana Cheerios with crispy freeze dried strawberries and California Farms Toasted Coconut Almond Milk

Sad girl today. I’ve been sad for a while since we started having kid talk.

We’re both 35, he’s military and home 4 months of the year.

I promised myself when I was 10, that I would be independent so I never had to depend on a man to pay my bills the way my mom did, as I watched her unhappily married to my stepdad.

At 35, I make 250k, have 1.3 in the stock market, currently in grad school, and I kept my promise.

All for some military misogynist to tell me I owe him children as his partner and I have a duty to give it to him.

I can’t help but feel I’m just a baby making machine to him. I feel he has no respect for my autonomy or my value outside of being someone who can carry kids for him.

I’ve never even wanted children.

We’re together 2.5 years. He’s my adventure partner. And he’s very loving outside of this kid stuff. I thought I met my person. I’m even going thru egg freezing now to keep him happy for the off chance I may all of a sudden feel baby fever. I just don’t tho-and I turn 36 in two months. I’d have kids with a man who’s home to help me raise them, and maybe who makes more money than me so he can pay a nanny. Why do I have to financially support HIS dream? I also can’t shake feeling objectified.

He says I’m a hedonist and a nihilist. Why can’t I be a peaceful girly who enjoys her freedom, quiet, kitties, and stress-free life?

Anyways. Just coming to terms with the fact I may be single again at 36, never married, with two cats 😂

UPDATE EDIT*

Wow this blew up!

girlies, and all, I want to thank you for taking the time to read and write to me. I can’t possibly respond to everyone but know that you’ve made me feel less alone all while laughing a lot. This sad girly is now a content girly.

I wish I had friends like you in real life. Thank you 💕💕

i recently had to move back to my parents cause of a lot of things. for a while i’ve have had a lot of issues with social stigma as far as being trans and with this government things have been horrible. The dating scene for trans people seems impossible to navigate and I just feel like I can’t pass enough ever. I also keep getting harassed in this beautiful red state 😔. Sooo that means I think im gonna throw in the towel with the whole transitioning thing.

So its time to retire the girl pronouns and start by going by he/him again 😔

I’ll miss u guys, it just feels wrong to post on here as a dude. Maybe i’ll post here again next election who knows ;p I love this sub sm tho and i hope all of you get everything you want 🫶🏻 #ihatemen

UT craft ramen in utah!!! super great place love them sm.

To make a VERY long story short, when I was a young teen (like 12-13yo) I was suffering horribly from allergies and sinus infections. The Dr did an MRI and discovered that my nose had been broken at some point and never set/treated. This means one of my nasal passages is almost completely closed off. The break had to have happened when I was VERY young apparently, like 2-5yo. He explained that surgery was necessary to correct it. For whatever reason my mom decided that guy was a quack, and made me believe I didn't really need surgery, that my nose had never been broken It was just blown off, and I was too young to really know better or stand up for myself at that time.

Fast forward to now, my sinus issues have basically decimated my quality of life. It causes me headaches, triggers my asthma. I cant smell. I cant breathe through my nose. I get weird sinus infections that settle in weird places and cause ISSUES (did you know sinus infections can cause symptoms similar to brain tumors or aneurysms?).

I finally worked up the courage to see a Dr about getting my "deviated septum" fixed last year. He reiterated that my nose had been broken at a young age. Discovered a lot of other issues being caused by the break and basically confirmed that without surgery, my quality of life is going to continue to suck. I mean I spent 7 days in the ICU last month with bronchitis that was being exacerbated by the postnasal drip my sinuses cause (which is also a major asthma trigger for me).

I am so ANGRY. Like first of all, how do you miss a small child breaking their nose?!?!?! Like what the actual fuck, mom? And the fact that she gaslit me for YEARS about it. And then there's the fact that we could have had this fixed when I was a teenager? We were poor af and on state Healthcare that would have covered it. That same year she had bariatric surgery, so its not like that was the issue.

But I just got saddled with over 100k in medical debt from the ICU visit. Debt I probably wouldn't have if she hadn't been so prideful and selfish when I was younger.

But she thinks me being angry about it is cruel and unfair to her, and she was just "doing her best".

Dinner is overpriced and under-seasoned tacos from "the best taco place in town" lol

Arrived in Italy for our honeymoon yesterday afternoon. My husband (M36)’s passport was stolen on the plane and he was refused entry. Sent back to the US on a flight 30 hours later.

I’m currently trying to carry on, hoping he can get an emergency passport there and come meet me. Trying with his mother to get all his documents sorted - turns out his birth certificate is in Maryland, 4 hours away.

I’m (F36) originally from East TN, and opened ig to find the news. I feel like god has died and I’m screwed and alone.

Anyways, I had some great pasta. Would have been great if I were able to enjoy anything right now. All I can do is wait.

EDIT/UPDATE
His passport was found in our home airport, it was on the plane and they found it immediately here. I guess he left it 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 He’s flying back and will at least get to see each location, though only one night in the first.

Now if only there was something to do about the second part of my post 😭💔

Thank you for all the nice words, gals!

I have known my best friend for seventeen years now.

We met in first grade. We both went to the same Catholic all-girls school that our moms graduated from. She was a very shy little girl who mostly kept to herself. She was prim, proper, and quietly well-behaved. She always wore a silver scapular around her neck, and even when we were kids, she carried herself with grace. We were assigned seats next to each other in first grade, and unfortunately for her, we've been inseparable ever since.

Even within the oppressive walls of our former alma mater, I knew that I loved my best friend and not in a way that was acceptable.

I really tried my best not to love her. I had been taught what happened to girls like me, and I believed it. I didn't want to live in sin. And Manila, or the Philippines in general, is not exactly a lesbian utopia.

When she got her first boyfriend at fourteen, I convinced myself it was time for me to start dating boys too. I was hoping that it would fix me. That a boyfriend would push away what I felt for her, but I could not bring myself to pretend. I love her, and there was nothing I could do about it but let it pass.

I knew I wanted to study abroad for college, so I waited it out. I was hoping that maybe this time enough distance would put an end to what I felt for her. But even from halfway across the world, I just could not escape her. We would always FaceTime each other, and it was as if I never left.

I just graduated recently, and still, I love her.

We both love Falling Slowly. We had this pact in high school where we promised each other we'd be each other's Maid of Honor, and somehow, we'd have Glen Hansard sing at our weddings. When I heard that he passed, I had this big epiphany about the uncertainty of life. And I decided I just needed to tell her how I feel because I don't know if I'd even be here tomorrow.

I told her how I feel, everything. I told her that nothing had to change. Deep down, I knew she didn't feel the same way.

However, she told me she loved me too. And that she has felt more when I hook my pinky fingers into hers than when she has slept with men. She said she loves me too, but that she owes her parents to try and be someone that they can be proud of. She also said that we owe each other to try and move on, and find happiness with someone else.

How do I even begin to move on from something that hadn't even begun?

I am in so much pain, and I don't know what to do about it.

I was entering Costco earlier and for the first time in my Costco experience, there was no one there checking memberships so I hesitated and stopped to look around for an employee. In the 5-10 seconds that I was looking around, a man approached me and began berating me, saying that I was stupid and should get out of the way. Mind you, I’m standing like a foot to the left of the leftmost of the TWO scanners so they’re both totally accessible to him. He’s also the only one making a fuss out of this, since there was literally no one else around (it had just opened) and the entrance at Costco is like 10 ft wide… I was not impeding his entrance to this establishment one bit!

Now, that made me freeze for a different reason (aka I’m scared of angry men). At this point the employee had returned and the man scanned his card and huffed past me. I scanned my membership too and headed in but started tearing up before passing the electronics section. I just ran out through the entrance and cried in my car until I could compose myself. Luckily, I only needed to grab a few things so I could be in and out really quick.

I know I overreacted, but I’m so mentally exhausted of people just being so angry all the time and taking that anger out on strangers. Like I guarantee that I am not the core reason he got mad at me, he’s probably mad at something personal. But that still doesn’t make reacting like that in a public setting ok.

Anyways this is what I wanted my dinner to be: açaí with powdered milk, chefs kiss you will not regret trying it… or maybe you will idk

Dinner is takeout curry up now
I (27f) was seeing this guy (27m) for several months. It felt like longer than it actually was, we spent so much time together. He regularly stayed over, especially since his job was closer to my place. We were compatible in sooo many ways, except his job means he can only work in big tech cities, since he’s not eligible for a remote position anytime soon. And I’d like to move away from a big city to be closer to family and actually be able to afford a house. So we made the tough decision to end it now rather than have it weigh on us until one or both of us needs to move. He was the best boyfriend I ever had, the embodiment of “if he wanted to he would.” Planned dates, cooked for me, helped me clean. I spent all day today in bed, in the bath, or on the couch. Tell me I’ll find love again one day? That there are other fish in the sea that’ll treat me as well as he did? Because right now I feel like giving up on love.

My sweet boyfriend made some tie dye ravioli with brie/ricotta and apple, and focaccia last night.

I’ll be turning myself in at 4:30 to begin my ten day sentence..

Update for those asking: It was as bad/worse than I thought it would be lol.. Locked down 21-31 hours a day in our cells, 2-3 hours out, and that was really really hard.. obviously the food was terrible, couldn’t eat much besides carrots for lunch, and pieces of cake and milks I’d trade my breakfast trays for. Made some friends. Started my period and only got two pairs of underwear. They did give me my meds after day 3, so that was good enough. Read five four hundred page novels. I feel bad for a lot of the younger girls in there. I felt really weird yesterday, but I ate a friggin huge breakfast so that was nice. Fucking terrible dude, I definitely never want to go back 🙏🏻

Today at 32 years old, I was supposed to marry the man I think I’ve loved the most in my life. He was wanted. His 3 girls were wanted. We were worth it.

Instead - 5 months ago, he cheated on me and left me for his friend. Broke our family, left with the animals. And eventually found out he was hiding an alcohol, coke and porn problem super well - never would have thought.

No apology. All the blame to me. Smear campaign and told everyone I was mentally unstable. Sure I know I dogged a bullet, but unfortunately not all the times were bad.

Most days my heart and head align - but today I am just brutally sad. Woke up this morning and my first thought was “Do you think he woke up this morning next to her and remembered what day it was supposed to be today?”

Blueberries and Fairlife. Maybe I’ll order some pho.

My fiance put his Apple ID into my iPad last night. I went on my iPad this morning while he was sleeping to work on our wedding planning spreadsheet.

Curiosity got the best of me, and I typed my name into his messages. I saw some pretty outright mean texts about me between him and his parents.

His sister and I have had a rocky year. She’s a very standoffish person, doesn’t like newcomers, and refused to even say hello to me at family gatherings for a bit.

The tension was obvious, and my fiance told me his parents reached out about it. His sister and I had a 1:1 conversation and decided to dead it. This was 1-2 months ago.

Now, reading the texts of how it actually went down and how they were all discussing it, his parents were saying some cruel things about me. I “don’t contribute anything”, my parents aren’t giving enough money for the wedding, “the least I can do is man up and text the sister first”, and so on.

I even reached out to his parents directly a few weeks ago wishing their sick grandpa well. I thought it was a nice gesture, but they screen shotted the message and sent it to my fiance saying “first time she’s reached out in a year”.

ALSO he told an extremely sensitive personal secret to both his parents and his sister. On two separate occasions.

I’m devastated. I have zero trust. Not once did he stand up for me. What the hell do I do

Pictured: overpriced Ubereats sushi!!

I picked out the ring a couple months ago and it’s in his hands now. I’ve been so happy, on edge about when it was finally going to happen, and happen to me.

Yesterday, he was packing for a friend’s bachelor party and took some papers out of his backpack. After he left, I went to tidy up a bit and found a print out of what looked like a ChatGPT prompt. It was dated April 27, 2026 and the first line was: “Nothing here requires you to resolve the proposal question.”

The rest of it compares his relationship with me (“steady, stable, feels like home”) to the electricity in a relationship over a decade ago. It advised him not to look at old photos and texts with her and to note his connection with me.

I cried all last night and today. My mom would have a heart attack so I called his mom instead. His mom was utterly confused, wondering why he was ruminating on a feeling from past relationship that made no sense to her as a mother. I spent 45 minutes with her. I also talked to a therapist through an online service at work who gave good advice, stating past memories can be easy to romanticize because they’re not accurate.

I can’t but feel crushed about this. I feel like I’ve given so much over the years only to come second to a feeling.

I have no idea how to approach this when he comes home tomorrow.

Butter chicken with rice

I have a part time job waiting tables at a local spot club (billiard dinner) and today i was assigned a table that was reserved for 14 military men. I worked for 8 hours before they came and all other waitresses were working at the billiard section so I had to serve and clean all by myself which Im not complaining about but this job is very physically demanding and I had a morning college class so I was already exhausted before they came.

I spent 3 hours and 26 minutes (yes the staff counted) running around them refilling water taking out the dirty plates bringing new plates to feed 14 people and every 4 minutes i was there to clean after them as they’d start shouting for me if I spent more than 5 minutes In the kitchen counting their plates and I had to run back immediately to wipe the table and take the dirty napkins. Whole time 3 of the men were trying to flirt with me but I had a terrible headache from all of the noise that was coming from them and the billiard section and i couldn’t hear them well so they’d just scream louder and I wasn’t allowed to go into changing room to take a pain killer.

After they were done and left two waitresses and the bartender decided to stay to help me clean the table and as I went to the kitchen to take the plates,I saw two of them looking at something and then looking at each other,they looked very concerned and took something from the table and threw it in the nearest trash can. I sneaked to take a peek and it was a fake 50$ bill they left to troll me and my colleagues felt bad for me and threw it away before I noticed. I took a bathroom break and cried for awhile then got back and thanked them for helping me and they left. I was sobbing uncontrollably walking to the subway I worked a 12 hour shift and they decided to be so cruel to me for no reason I saw the pity in the colleagues eyes and I know I will get pitied if I tell someone irl but I feel so humiliated and dehumanised i cant share it with anyone I never expect a tip especially in a dinner the most i get is 5 bucks a day but this was so unnecessary and I never pushed them to tip me i don’t know what on earth could’ve provoked them to troll me like this

Edit: Im really grateful for all the support and kind hearted people who reached out but im not a grifter and this was a vent after a hard and a very emotional day,i can never imagine taking money i didn’t earn,god bless you🩷

I'm a PhD student and half of my entire research project is based around a simulation software library written by a very well respected researcher in my field. I don't want to provide details since there's so few people publishing here it might be identifiable.

Things have been going wrong for almost a year. Failed experiment after failed experiment. Constant setbacks, and nothing seems to come out right. I have considered dropping out multiple times, and I'm losing hair from all the stress and many late nights in the lab.

Today I figured out why: an error in the physics calculations the software does has left an offset of a few micrometers in everything we've done since the beginning. We didn't notice at first because we weren't pushing to the limits so it didn't matter, but as soon as we started trying things at that precision it became a giant problem. No one figured it out because that error is, frankly, really hard to measure in our system. We didn't think to check because we trusted the software implicitly.

Probably I should feel like this is a victory. I did an experiment today and it worked for the first time in a year.

I don't feel good at all.

My graduation will be delayed, I haven't published a paper that was supposed to be submitted six months ago, and I have wasted so much time and grant money on this stupid stupid issue. I just feel so dumb. I should have figured this out so much sooner.

Trader Joe's Gorgonzola gnocchi at my desk because I'm still here working, and probably will be until midnight.

Edit: thank you all for these amazing responses. Read them and cried once I finished my work last night. It is really comforting to see how many of you are/have been in the trenches with academia. Everyone here reminded me to look at my job like its something real and impressive and that it's not supposed to go perfectly like in the movies. Thank you so much, the community on this sub is impeccable ❤️

had an interview for my local public library today to be the librarian over the children’s books. The actual interview went great! The directors seemed excited to meet me and impressed of my knowledge- for not having a BLIS degree, and I was confident in my abilities. I was excited and fell in love with the position!

Then I asked about pay and benefits.

Good- The city pays insurance and retirement, there’s a longevity bonus and a christmas stipend.

Bad- It’s only $13/hr, enough to juuuust cover all my bills and keep my dog and cat healthy. Not enough for savings, student loans, subscriptions (e.g. Netflix)

now I’m depressed because I currently make $20/hr at walmart and I want to leave so badly but I don’t want to just barely survive

i’ve been seeing my therapist for 3 years. she’s one of the only therapists that i’ve ever connected with and had long term. i have made so much progress with her

every wednesday we have a telehealth appt from 6-7pm. this past wednesday, she did not join our appt. I texted her, which she has always told me to do, if i’m in the waiting room for more than 5 min past my appt time. she did not answer. at 6:15 i followed up asking if we were still having our session today and if i missed something. I also emailed her. in 3 years, she has never ONCE been late, or cancelled without communicating with me. the previous week, she cancelled our session and said “see you same day/time next week”

i stayed in the waiting room the full session time just in case.

important context, ive been telling my bf for the past 8-10 months that she looks sick, has lost a ton of weight, etc. obviously i don’t know if that observation is correlated to this or not but there is a drastic change in her appearance

thursday and friday passed and she did not respond to me. this is also very unlike her as she always has responded in 24 hours or less.

so obviously at this point i’m concerned she’s hospitalized/dead

my coworker also sees her, and her appt is on fridays. she never even got an appt link. she texted, emailed, and also called. rang and went to VM.

I looked up her name to see if i could find an obituary or news or anything, and i didn’t. but what i did find is an updated headshot for one of the online platforms she’s on and you could see the difference so clearly.

i tried to message headway (platform i found her on) support to see if they could check up on her and they basically said they’ll make sure im not charged for my session. i thought about calling for a wellness check but she’s licensed in 2 states and idk which she lives in, or what city for obvious reasons. at this point i think it’s safe to say my fears of death are a real possibility, but i hope maybe she’s just hospitalized and is going to make a full recovery. idk if she has a partner or if she lives with someone, but i keep getting intrusive thoughts of her being dead alone in her house with her dogs and no one knowing.

i really hope i hear something soon, even if that’s she needs to retire/go on leave.

lasagna soup for dinner.

My mom just recently came to live with my and my husband. She just learned that my dad (they were married for 35 years) cheated on her and she's trying to figure out life without him. It's been a week since she's been here.

Anyway, we have a lot of animals at my house. One of the screen doors doesn't close all the way and she didn't know that and the cat got out. It was an accident, it happens. Yes, I'm sad about the cat but I'm not mad at my mom. I've posted him on socials, and he has a collar on with my phone number on it so I'm hopeful.

Anyway, my husband's response was not the same. He started screaming at her, telling her that she needs to be careful, that how dare she "let the fucking cat out" and screamed and raised his voice, was hitting the table, the counter, and was throwing things. He then started yelling at me when I told him to stop.

My mom broke down in tears and was crying and had a full blown panic attack so I took her out of the house and we went and got coffee and some ramen (pictured above). She was hyperventilating and crying and said she feels like it's all her fault and that she doesn't want to come between me and my husband and she's so sorry about the cat. And now I feel terrible for her, it's not her fault, and I don't know how to tell her that.

Anyway, I threw out the term divorce to my husband because you're not going to talk to anyone like that, especially not my mom or myself. He left and came back playing the victim saying that I shouldn't throw that word around, that I'm fucking up for doing it, and I should have calmed him down rather than adding fuel to the fire.

Now he's left to stay at his brother's, my mom is in shambles and thinks it's her fault that all of this happened, and I'm feeling numb and don't know what to do.

a few pieces of white bread without crusts bc this is all i can eat for my colonoscopy in two days.

I found out today that my bsf is transphobic and against me being trans and wanting to get top surgery.

This is devastating news. We have been bffs for 10 years since we met in high school, and I even flew across the world to attend her wedding to be her bridesmaid last year. I really thought we were tight and she supports my identity.

I have never been in a closet, before I knew her I was already identifying as bi in middle school. And i’ve always kept her up to date about my gender identity and sexuality. She was okay with me being bi/pan, asexual, and even when I changed my name and begin using they/them pronouns. She has always been an “ally” to the gay community.

But the second that I say I am trans and is looking to get top surgery now that it’s financially viable, she wants to talk me out of it bc she’s a “follower of Christ.” And she also revealed that when I told her I was nb, she prayed that I would eventually make peace with the initial identity god gave me. Hearing words like this from someone you love is so sad.

Oh yeah and my birthday is next week. So this is just a bad time to lose a friend. Losing a decade long friendship to a boob job is definitely not on my 2026 bingo.

UPDATE:
Overwhelmed with the support and kindness I have received. Unfortunately I won’t be able to reply to all but I will try to read all of them. I will be talking to her on video call next week to have “the talk,” pray for me friends.

FYI: For those that doesn’t know, bsf means best friend.

UPDATE 2:
The colonoscopy went well!

Inspired by Chicken Tagine!! Rice pilaf, caramelized onions, spiced chicken, cherry tomatoes, feta, tzatziki.

Boyfriend of 8 years was fired from his job in March. It was a shitty service industry job so we agreed it would be okay to take a month off and try to correct his sleep and exercise then get back into the job search since we’re trying to save for a wedding and a house.

We’re onto month 3 now and he’s refusing to find work because he’s doing full-time writing right now. He claims that he actually has time and energy now to write and picked up this novel he hasn’t touched in years. It was nice seeing him rediscover his passions at first but now he’s refusing to find work altogether, at least for the summer, claiming that the novel is more of an investment in the future than working some dumb job.

To be fair he has always had dreams of being a writer so I understand what this time means to him, but at the same time it feels like he’s retreating from the real world and getting caught up in this fantasy of “blowing up.”

I read his novel and thought it was okay but he insists I’m just missing what it’s really about and maybe he’s right. But even though we’re not financially suffering too much from his unemployment it still hurts to come home from work to find him sitting on the couch with his laptop and a Red Bull telling me he had a productive day. And then I have to go make dinner. I want to be supportive it just makes me sad.

This happened a few weeks ago and I've been ruminating. Long story short, my friend let it slip that there's a separate group chat and had an "oh shit" look on her face when I clarified it. I wasn't supposed to find out. Frozen Walmart taquitos seasoned with tears.

I only see one person n my friend group on a regular basis. This friend and I live in the same town. I don't have a car and most of our friends live in the next town over. So they all see each other often, but I usually can't come because I don't have a car to drive myself there. I don't mind at all, people are allowed to hang out even if not everyone can make it.

One time, she was telling me about a funny meme someone sent in the group chat. I hadn't checked my phone that day so I said I'd look at it later. I couldn't find one that was exactly the same, but one was similar so I thought she misremembered the details of the joke. I didn't think anything of it.

Then another time she mentioned something about dinner plans everyone made. I said "I don't remember seeing any messages about it." And she said "Oh, weird. Maybe we talked about it in person when you weren't there and we forgot to send the details in the group chat." But she sounded like she kind of made a lie up on the spot. She did end up telling me the plans, I was included, and I got no obvious weird vibes from anyone during dinner.

The time I finally figured it out was a birthday party. I had already bought a gift for the birthday girl and figured I'd give it to her the next time I was in her town. I texted her happy birthday and didn't get a response. I assumed she was spending time with her boyfriend and family, so I didn't mind that she didn't answer. But later that night I saw Instagram stories and posts. It looked like a really fun party. Tons of food, balloons, yard games, a cake with a funny inside joke with our friend group. Everyone was there in the pictures, even boyfriends and friends of friends. I was the only one not included.

I brought this up to my friend the next time I saw her and she said "I was wondering why you didn't come." It sounded like she was genuinely confused. I said that I didn't even know about it and nobody said anything. She said "yes we did! We've been planning it for a whole month in the group chat!" And pulled it up to show me...

Homegirl realized her mistake. She got the group chats mixed up. They were similar titles and emojis (example 💗✨Bad Bitch Club✨💗 vs 💖💖 Bad Bitchezzz 💖💖).

I said "so... There's a separate group chat?" And she kind of stammered and said it's because sometimes I can't hang out because I can't drive there myself to meet them. So they made a separate one so I don't feel bad and like I'm missing out. Even though SHE could drive me. We live five minutes away from each other. It's pretty much crickets in the group chat I'm in, unless I say something first. Even then, I might only get one or two responses or a heart reaction to my message. They've been strategically planning what I'm included in and what I'm not. Like they're slowly phasing me out until I just quit trying.

Pictured: Grilled Salmon with lemon burre blanc, creamy risotto, rosted potatos. Not pictured: Rosted red pepper crab bisque.

So I went to the ER last Thursday due to some pain and not so pleasant things happening. Got a CT scan of my body and they found a 5cm mass on my colon. Okay, well that sucks but no official answers, just waited on a GI appointment.

Well I went to my GI consultation yesterday. Have been on a mostly liquid diet for a week. Some soft foods but me and bone broth have gotten along well over the past week. On a good note I have been trying to lose weight so that has helped. Anyway GI scheduled me, quickly I might add, for a colonoscopy and biopsy today.

Did all the prep which sucks but you gotta do what you gotta do. Got the procedure done and the doctor came back and the prognosis is not great, not the worst but not great. Pathology has obviously not come back yet but I trust the doctor and he immediately sent a referral into a hospital that is well renowned for my state. He told us he has pull and could get me in pretty quickly there. He was not kidding! They called me on my way home and I have a surgical consultation set up for Monday.

So I have colon cancer. I officially have cancer. When asked how bad he thought it was he said "medium". So at least it's not the worst case scenario. I am a 44 year old mother to an autistic 9 year old and I have colon cancer.

He told me it's going to be a long road but he thinks it's curable. And actually used the word "Curable".

Pay attention to your bodies ladies. Please!!! If something weird is going on there is probably a reason. I wish I had paid closer attention sooner. I just hate going to the doctor so put it off until something scared me. This could ha e been caught sooner.

I am very lucky. I have a great support system. I am luckier than most in those regards. I have a great husband and great family that wants to do anything they can and wants to be there through every step of this journey.

But yeah. I have cancer.

Edit: You all are amazing!!! Thank you!! I am doing my best to upvote all of you but you are just positively overwhelming in a wonderful way!! There are multiple comments with symptoms and some have shared some great links for what to look for. I want to say that weight loss is not necessarily a thing...I actually had weight gain. Everyone is a little different.

It was always my dream to become a psychotherapist. I studied for a long time, completed seven years of training, and for years barely had enough to live on. Now I am finally a psychotherapist, and I only bought a spot in the public insurance system a few months ago (I live in Germany). I was finally able to pursue my dream job. But now, the government has implemented massive cost-cutting measures in the healthcare system. I am allowed to treat significantly fewer patients, even though the demand is so incredibly high. These changes are not only completely illogical but also threaten my livelihood. Our professional association has told us today that we should establish a second source of income. I have ADHD myself and have created good structures for myself in the last months. My patients are satisfied and making progress. For the first time, I feel comfortable in a job without getting depressions because can work at my own pace without pressure. I don’t want a second source of income, I don’t want to take on private-pay patients and I just want to do the work I’ve spent so long preparing for. Upending and changing everything again takes a lot of energy, and I’m feeling really down right now. Could you cheer me up a bit?

Food: Stuffed antipasti, bulgur, vegetarian "meat" salad, yoghurt, falafel, olives and cheese.

Edit: Thanks for all your kind words and the empathy you’ve shown me. It really helped. I also want to encourage you not to give up. Somewhere out there there’s surely a fartmaxxing therapist sitting in her office with a therapy spot that has just opened up for you.