r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/ArcherVisible5866 • 5h ago

Video New controversial Ad in Ireland about consent

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u/WingDairu 5h ago

This thread is full of people who really don't understand the point:

It's not telling you grandparent hugs are bad. It's telling you that ignoring other people's boundaries REGARDING THEIR OWN PHYSICAL BODY is bad.

This is especially important with kids, because it's important to teach kids that they're allowed to exercise bodily autonomy. If kids aren't taught that, it becomes far easier for someone to take advantage of them being trained to allow touching they don't want because they feel like they have to.

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u/Buzz_Mcfly 4h ago

Yep, sometimes my kids don’t want to hug my father in law and he said “awe but now you are making grandpa sad “. Without skipping a beat my wife said “well Grandpa is a grown adult responsible for managing his own feelings and kids arnt obliged to make him feel better”….. he didn’t know what to say, and I was so proud of my wife.

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u/JdsPrst 4h ago

That's kind of bullshit though. I hope you find better things to be proud of in your wife

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u/Kazeshio 4h ago

you think grandpa isn't a grown adult and kids are obligated to make him feel better?

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u/madasheII 4h ago

I think people thinking there is nothing wrong in wife's reply are not grown adults

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u/panrestrial 4h ago

What, specifically, was wrong about it?

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u/JdsPrst 4h ago edited 4h ago

No I think that parents who step in to negotiate or navigate every step in a child's journey towards maturity and adulthood are setting their kids up for failure.

Parents do know best, kids are just trying their best, but there was a better way to handle your situation and your wife chose a poor way that, in my professional, father of three, ages between 1 year and 23 years old, self would say, hurt the kid and the grandparent.

That is why I think it's kind of bullshit and that I hope you find better reasons to be proud of your wife.

Edit: Now eat a cock and buzz off

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u/InvisibleLandBorder 4h ago

No, kids should have advocates.

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u/JdsPrst 4h ago

I agree kids should have advocates. Why is reading comprehension and understanding so difficult for redditors? Read my comment again and good luck

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u/SpookySnep 4h ago

Grandpa wanted a hug and the kids said no thanks -> kids said no
Grandpa attempts emotional manipulation to get a hug -> if you don't do this, I'll be sad and it's your fault -> coerced consent
Wife tells Grandpa he can handle it -> backing up the decision made by the kids

I think you're the one with reading comprehension issues

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

No again, you're the one with comprehension issues. I never said grandparents were right in that scenario. I said the mother was wrong. Please give me your argument against that and we can continue if you'd like.

You're jumping to conclusions.

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u/DILF_MANSERVICE 3h ago

No, you need help understanding what you wrote. Firstly, you exaggerated the scenario to make your argument sound better

Parents shouldn't step in and navigate every step of child's journey

No one said this. They were literally talking about one scenario, and you changed it. The kid set a boundary, and the grandparent tried to make them feel guilty for setting that boundary. The grandparent was actively un-teaching an important lesson. Unless you think children are immune to outside influences, the parent absolutely has a responsibility to step in and correct the lesson so the kid doesn't walk away thinking they did something wrong. The consequence of letting someone punish your kid for setting boundaries is your kid stops setting boundaries. You're absolutely nuts for thinking the parents were wrong for backing up their kid and preventing that from happening.

Again, you had to change the scenario to "micromanaging every step of their life" when the actual scenario is "one time, someone tried to teach a child to stop setting boundaries, and the parents corrected it". I can exaggerate too: You're saying parents should never teach their kids lessons or stop outsiders from teaching them bad lessons???

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

This one is actually too long for me to read right now. I'll check back later if I remember. Ping me broski if I forget.

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u/DILF_MANSERVICE 3h ago

Two paragraphs?

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

Two paragraphs that I need to think hard about in order to properly respond to while I was trying to get dinner ready for the family.

Yes. Those two paragraphs.

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u/InvisibleLandBorder 3h ago

Everyone read your comment and took from it exactly what you wrote. His wife handled it completely fine and acted as an advocate.

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u/king_hutton 4h ago

I’m shocked that a guy who ends posts with “eat a cock and buzz off” has a problem with consent.

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u/JdsPrst 4h ago

There's no problem with consent bro. But you're right, I have been childish in my responses and it's because I am now getting emotionally charged by having to ward off the poor thinkers or misunderstanding folks.

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u/JelmerMcGee 4h ago

Maybe there are some children around who you can have manage your feelings for you?

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

Lol. That is a good one but I don't see your opinion anywhere.

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u/king_hutton 3h ago

You’re getting emotional over Reddit comments supporting consent. Take a step back.

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

Incorrect. I am getting emotional over the real life experienced feelings I mentioned in my original comment. Not over the reddit comments.

Continuing to talk about this is bringing to mind all my own problem with this topic and my middle child.

I can comment and distract myself with dinner though.

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u/aliamokeee 4h ago

Sooo one could say you, like the grandfather in this story, have trouble managing your own emotions, and instead try to make everyone else deal with it.

Block and report yall

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u/Disused_Yeti 4h ago

they're teaching their kids to stand up for themselves and not cave in by backing them up. it is so they will eventually tell gramps to buzz off themselves without the help but they aren't there yet

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

That's a great lesson to teach kids. That is not what the parent did there. I worry about everyone's parenting abilities here.

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u/thisdesignup 4h ago

> Parents do know best

Since when?

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u/JdsPrst 3h ago

Fair. I would change it to adults tend to know better than children but CLEARLY that is not true from a lot of these comments. I no longer know if parents know best.

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u/InvisibleLandBorder 4h ago

No it isn’t.