r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/ArcherVisible5866 • 4h ago

Video New controversial Ad in Ireland about consent

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u/mostly_lurking 4h ago

If you think this is controversial you might have a boundary problem.

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u/Tananaka 3h ago edited 2h ago

The people who keep commenting "omg you're being sensitive" are so dumb.

This isn't a "Don't touch people anymore" PSA.

It's a "Hey, be more aware of what you're doing before you're doing it" PSA.

Half of y'all acting as if it's somehow your 1st amendment right to hug someone and that's just weird af 🫠

It's literally not that hard to greet someone without hugging them...

EDIT: People seem to be missing the point and keep considering the kid to be "sensitive" in the commercial.

The commercial isn't focusing on the kid here, it's focusing on the adults/huggers. The message is literally to be mindful. SIMPLE.

If you're someone that hugs people with ill intent, it doesn't matter. You're an ill-intented person anyways so you wouldn't care.

If you're someone that hugs people without ill intent, it's suppose to tell you to be mindful that no matter how good your intentions are, some people will be discomforted by it.

Those of you who are complaining about people being sensitive? You're part of the group that holds ill-intented, because why are you even making such a big deal about this if you truly care for the other person?

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u/euphoricarugula346 2h ago

I mean people can’t even handle not saying specific words, now you expect them not to perform specific actions? /s

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u/Tananaka 1h ago

True. This is the pronoun debate all over again.

It's not that hard to treat people with respect y'all. It takes zero to no effort.

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u/wholovesoreos 3h ago

Real! And I don't understand why some people still want to hug you even after they know you don't want to? It just feels like an ego thing at that point.

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u/BirdLawMD 3h ago

It’s not dumb. Researchers suggest that attempts to protect young people from emotional discomfort are inadvertently fueling the mental health crisis by stripping them of the resilience needed to navigate everyday adversity

This safetyism creates more anticipatory anxiety, amplifies minor grievances, and contributes to the “anxious generation” problem we’re seeing today

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u/connery55 3h ago

The study you linked is specifically  and entirely about content warnings online.

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u/CeramicToast 3h ago

And is therefore notably about MEDIA, not about bodily autonomy and consent.

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u/CeramicToast 3h ago

Not even remotely the same thing. Teaching kids that they have a right to refuse to be touched, hugged, or kissed if they don't want to is not the same as preventing them from developing discomfort tolerance.

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u/BirdLawMD 3h ago

I think by telling the kid they can say no to any discomfort absolutely develops an intolerance.

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u/panrestrial 2h ago

by telling the kid they can say no to any discomfort

Good thing that's not what anyone is saying, then.

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u/Tananaka 2h ago

That's such a poor argument.

I'm not gonna say that "saying no to discomfort develops intolerance" is completely incorrect, but this isn't something that applies to things like hugs. There's nuance to that statement.

-You SHOULD teach your kid to say no to:

  • unwanted hugs
  • unwanted kisses
  • doing activities they don't actually want to do.

You SHOULDN'T teach your kid to say no to:

  • doing their homework.
  • cleaning their room.

Your argument only really applies when it's a non-physical developmental discomfort. Being "tolerant" of hugs does nothing for a child's developmental growth.

Saying "no" to unwanted physical contact doesn't make them "intolerant". It teaches them that they have their own bodily autonomy and consent. They shouldn't have to grow "tolerant" of people touching them and hugging them when they grow up. It doesn't matter who they are, how close they are to you, if you don't want to be touched it's that simple.

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u/CeramicToast 1h ago

Your link is about MEDIA, not being PHYSICALLY TOUCHED.

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u/rocketsaurus 3h ago

This is absolutely not the same thing. Asserting physical autonomy and establishing that consent and boundaries are to be enforced with adults helps save children from assualt and abuse. You are conflating two very different situations. No one is saying to shield children from all discomfort. They're saying that every human being deserves to have their autonomy and body respected.

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u/BirdLawMD 3h ago

The grandparents will kiss/squeeze/hug you- by even suggesting this is in the realm of assault and abuse you’ve merged the two totally different scenarios - unwanted hug vs assault/abuse into one concept for the child’s mind. This is just leading to more and more kids having body/physical touch issues.

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u/CeramicToast 3h ago

That's not what they're saying.

They're saying that by teaching children that they have bodily autonomy and have a right to tell people they don't want to be touched, even by family, that they have the right to tell ANYONE they don't want to be touched. And THAT helps prevent children from enduring abuse because they feel that someone else has the right to touch them, or that being touched against their will isn't a big deal.

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u/rocketsaurus 3h ago

Also I really think this doesn't even have to be about abuse. It's just about acknowledging that children are people and as such they have autonomy. They get to decide how they engage with the world. They're human beings.

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u/rocketsaurus 3h ago

I really don't think that is true. Considering that this idea, that kids can say no to hugs, is so new we have to have PSA's about it I would argue we have no idea what the knock on effects are. But we do know that a child who is allowed and encouraged to say no to touch with someone they are comfortable with and is NOT a danger means they will feel more able to do so when they are less safe, AND way more likely to tell a parent that someone did something they didn't like. If you're supposed to suck it up and hug adults no matter what, how confusing would it be if someone does abuse you but they're an adult you're supposed to just hug? Also in my experience most kids love to give hugs, they absolutely will, and they should also be completely free to decide when and who they do. Unwanted touch is unwanted touch, that's way easier to understand than "some unwanted touch is required and some is so bad you have to tell a grown up right away."

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u/BirdLawMD 3h ago

I’d agree we have no idea about the effects- I think sitting with your kid to talk about unwanted hugs from grandpa and saying “no” conflates a small everyday type scenario into an assault/trigger emotional thing that is a “concept creep” of - an unwanted hug from grandpa is assault.

The concept of assault needs to be a separate conversation that is serious