another edit to add: damn i can tell some of you don’t read the text on posts, and also some of you are so damn rude lol but this is reddit so should’ve expected it 😂 THE BEARD HAS BEEN TRIMMED IT NO LONGER LOOKS LIKE PUBES
EDITED TO ADD: i’m planning on cutting my beard shorter today, i just took those pics this morning before i lost the courage to post this 😅
hey everyone, wanted some opinions.
I’m 30, non-binary, and been on low dose testosterone for 7 years, i’ve been gradually receding but no other hair loss (no patchiness, thinning, balding at the crown etc), i’m very attached to my hair because i never liked it before testosterone made it curly, but it turning curly allowed me to grow it and actually like it (it looked terrible when i tried to grow it out with straight hair, trust me).
I know i’m gonna have to cut it eventually, it’s more a case of when, i probably won’t go fully bald at first as well, i’ll include a pic of what i’m thinking for my next hairstyle, a thin mohawk kinda thing (pic 8). I’ll also include pics of me in my late teens + early 20’s so you can see the hairline i started off with as comparison as well, and an in-between pic (pink and brown hair).
But yeah, do i cut it sooner rather than later? does my hair look bad with how bad the receding is? please be honest but kind 😅
Adding to this OP: in my experience as just a cis dude, when I started shaving it felt very affirming to me (I just didn't know the term at the time). I know a lot of folks in the LGBT world that similarly grow facial hair because they feel like they should but then start shaving and never go back for that reason. I'd try it if I were you because the wispy facial hair doesn't look good on anyone. If you decide you miss the wisps you can grow em back!
Trans guy here! I’ve been on testosterone for 7 years (though not a low dose) and I want to echo your comment.
My facial hair is only now starting to fill in properly and be coarse. It’ll probably be another year or two before it looks good when it grows beyond stubble.
Shaving feels super affirming to me.
But, OP, do what feels most comfortable and affirming to you! I totally understand the grief over the hair loss. All the men in my family are bald … and I am now too.
CIS guy here. Facial hair is weird. I know people who had full glorious beards at 16. Myself, I was patchy until my forties. Beards will happen when they happen.
I feel obliged to add more weight to the comments already posted. You gotta shave your head now, it's well past time. You should also shave all of the facial hair, as the whispiness is doing you exactly zero favours. You'll look and feel so much better afterwards.
I'll try to say this as kindly as possible - you're not going to be able to pull of the haircut you posted. The vast majority of men are unable to pull that haircut off. You need to either be incredibly handsome and jacked to make that work, or you need to have the strongest Scandinavian/viking genes going.
i appreciate the honesty and opinion, thank you. I guess i’m just trying to find any hairstyle that allows me to keep some hair, as i said in my post about being very attached to it, but i think you’re right, it’s just scary to go from this to completely bald, gonna definitely have to work up the courage, but that’s what this post was to help with!
It's a big leap, for sure. Just need some courage to go for it and own it. There's plenty of inspiration in this subreddit. I can almost guarantee that doing it will make you feel a lot better about yourself and your appearance, but I appreciate how difficult that decision is. All the best!
This. But also - your current hairline wouldn’t support that hairstyle. Your hairline has receded too much at the sides and you’d end up with a very thin braid/strip of hair. I don’t think you’d be happy with it.
That hairstyle works with very thick hair and a very healthy hairline. It is not suitable for someone with thinning hair or a receding hairline.
someone once told me the stress of looking at himself while his hair was getting less and less was worse than just taking the plunge and going bald. i can imagine it must feel liberating. ask yourself if it’s worth that stress. i think you’ll look much kinder too!
one of the only helpful comments haha thank you. Yeah i’ve been feeling more and more insecure about it, baldness also runs in my family, my brother is bald, my dad is bald, my moms dad had curtains lol, so i was kinda shit out of luck with my genes. I think i’m gonna go the mohawk first, but if i don’t vibe with it i’ll just go bald i think, i do think it’ll be quite liberating!
Exactly this. As a woman, it was so stressful and depressing. But now I’m just a bald lady 😅 it’s so freeing. I still get a little bleh about it every once in a while, but it’s better than looking the way I did.
I went back and looked through all the photos. This has got to be so distressing because you clearly had a blast with your hair. Keep the photos and memories though. Let your hair go. It is time
i think you’re the first person to notice that and that’s made me cry.. it is incredibly distressing to me, will feel like closing a big chapter on my life
I would try a very short buzzcut. You can always have fun doing patterns on your head (even bleaching and painting if you're still into it) and also, eyebrows which people kinda forget about. It's not ideal, it's not the same kind of blast you had with you hair, but it's something. You know, lemonade and whatnot.
I'm from Brazil and although it might be a little too "ethnical" (for lack of a better word) for your ass, there's a big culture of "funkeiros" that just have fun with their shit.
Reflexive hair (cabelo com reflexo) Pigmented beards (barba pigmentada, especially cool since some people simply don't have a very homogenous beard growth)
All kinds of weird patterns and other weird shit that I think is cool and very important when thinking about "male-presenting self-care"(not sure if that's the correct nomenclature so i apologize in advance).
It's a more tame example, and maybe it doesn't work for your hair, but just so you can get the idea:
OP this is a very unconventional idea, but since you mentioned wanting to keep SOME hair and liking the curl, and since you have a history of having fun and being bold with your hair, what about a full shave with a rattail?
I personally think they look a bit sad left loose, but if you braided it then the end could still show off some curl. You could also color it if you want.
You definitely have the length and quantity in the back, so doing one off one side of the nape of your neck (for example) could be an option.
I did a lot with my hair. Huge Mohawks, bi-hawks, tri-hawks, multicolored, absolute chaos. But I never wanted to be the thin comb over person. I’ve now been bald for almost a decade and while I miss my hair it is a chapter. None of us chose our bodies but we get to live and adapt with them. Enjoy this new chapter and find new amazing ways to express your soul through looks.
thank you! unfortunately i cant change my glasses until next september as that’s when my next eye test is, but i’ll be bald before then so i’ll at least know what works for my head shape when i next go!
Hi OP, trans man here. I'm sorry this has happened on just some low dose T, but it's time to lose it. Buzz the head, trim the facial hair. Having short facial hair can make it look a bit more dense, growing it out looks wispy and thin. Same applies to head hair, buzzed head where you can still grow some hair, which you clearly can, looks like a choice, rather than keeping long hair with a bad hairline which looks more like you're kidding yourself about your situation. Whatever you decide, I hope you like it!
thank you. yeah i’m thinking short grade instead of skin shave, and facial hair has been trimmed today, i was gonna do it anyway bc it was getting too long, but realised i should’ve done it before taking pics + posting 😅
Cut it, you can try the mohawk but it probably won't look as good as you would hope. The image you found needs a whole lot more hair than anything you have beard or head.
You'll be way more confident and care free once you get rid of it. I understand that the beard is giving you gender euphoria since you acquired it recently, but you don't have enough hair to grow it yet.
appreciate the honesty, i did just cut my beard shorter, realising i should’ve done that before taking those pics and posting this haha 😅 but yes i think people are correct in saying not to do the mohawk, i think i was just trying to find any hairstyle that allowed me to keep hair while negating the receding, but i see now that that most likely wont work how i imagine
Cool, you got this 🥰. If that helps I'm pretty sure the pic you found is a wig lol, maybe find a cool wig if you want to sometimes recreate this look ?
unfortunately with being autistic i can’t stand the sensory feeling of wigs 😭 and i never wanted to hide the balding as well, if im going bald then that’s it 💁
For that mohawk to work you need insane hair density. Like, Scandinavian thick hair. Most people don’t have that, and on top of it, you seem to have pretty fine hair strands - which is typical for this curl pattern! But it will never look like the inspiration.
You could go for weird and kooky hairstyles if you really want to keep the hair - a skullet, a Manchu queue - but if you want to look like your average Joe and look good, going bald is the best way.
I know hair can be a big form of self expression and it’s difficult to lose it. But you’re gonna look good!
Based on your pictures, you've really enjoyed having different hairstyles so I understand this is difficult to process. Like others have said, it's time to take the plunge and unfortunately I don't believe you'll be happy with the mohawk because the results are not going to look anything like the inspo pic.
Because your hair has been a big part of your life, I would encourage you to look into wigs! Quality wigs have become so much more accessible and it will give you the freedom to try everything!! Texture, color, style - it can be really freeing.
I'm genderqueer on T and slowly went bald. When I saw pics other people took of me, and not my own selfies, I realized how much it changed. My hair used to be the only thing I liked about my body. I had faux Hawks, undercuts, fun stuff all my life. It was my biggest gender euphoria. So it is a whole different level of loss.
But I'm over 10 years on T. I may not have a faux hawk but there is sooo much I love about my body now. I have days where I miss my hair. But they are fewer and far between. I started with buzz cuts, but now I do full shave. It's actually a satisfying process. But you look like a buzz cut would look awesome. And like others said you could do designs. Keep your stache and goatee a stubble. I used to grow mine long in the beginning too, but now I look at pics and see how scraggly it looked. But facial hair is more important to us than most folks I think.
And you've got gorgeous eyes, cool piercings, and what I like to call the trans foundation of youth lol. It'll pop even more without the hair that is weighing you down. Whatever you feel during the process and even after, it's okay. Let yourself feel it. Love your past self, honor and love your present self.
You’re not the first to go on T to discover you inherited a receding hairline and you won’t be the last. I’d keep the mustache. It may not be perfect, but I think it looks good enough that it will go a long way toward looking good but still feeling handsome. As you continue taking T, maybe your beard line will come in better. But there are lots of cis men who can’t grow a beard either, so don’t take it too personally if that doesn’t happen. If you want to feel more colorful, you can get different plugs, brighter clothes, hell you can even face paint your head with colorful sunscreen. Your hair doesn’t have to be the vehicle for your individuality 💗
Honestly I would say don't cut it. And rock the skillet. I'm on the fence about your goatee. I get that's like a point of pride for you (respectfully) but the neck beard vibes are strong. Does your face not grow enough to get passed scruff? Why not raise your dose? I normally wouldn't ask you these questions but I feel like you are asking for opinions so therefore I hope I'm not out of line.
A different point of view here: yes you're obv balding but I don't think that's SO bad in your case. Your curls are lovely and if you feel it shows your personality/ expressing yourself with colour & style then I think you can still rock it! Whatever makes you happy
I was also very attached to my hair, I had thick long hair for all of my teens and it started thinning in my mid twenties, I shaved it off during lockdown because no one was going to see me anyway so I didn't feel self conscious about it, now if I'm being honest I'd much rather be bald, my life is so much easier, it might take a week or two but you get used to how you look
If you're attached to your hair, there's no reason you can't keep it. Your hair is allowed to naturally recede, don't conform to the standards other people set. People ask me not to shave my head, but I do it because having hair makes me feel dead inside. Do what makes you happy.
That being said, you would also look great bald, so it's definitely an option.
As a fellow transmasc I understand the need to cling onto any scrap of facial hair all too well. I know it's gender affirming but pleeaaase shave it, even buzz it to a 0 if you want to feel a bit of stubble
Straggly facial hair does not look good on anyone ever, you'll look great with your facial hair tidied and your head shaved! :)
If you do the braided mohawk be aware that tying your hair tightly like that may tug even more out. It'll probably be your last chance to do it though so if you're wanting that the time is now. If it looks bad you can do a full on shave. Also groom the beard area.
beard area is now groomed 🫡 i should’ve taken pics and posted this afterwards but just chucked this up while i had the courage. I wouldn’t be tying my hair like that, that was more to show how much i’d cut off/the style i’d get, but definitely hear you on why tying it down would be bad!
I mean, you can always try to do the mohawk thing, then shave it all off afterwards? I personally think mohawks are kinda tricky with such a pronounced widow's peak.
I just think it might put a lot of tension on that hair to keep it braided in place, but you do you, and see what makes you most comfortable ! If you decide to go all the way, please make sure to update us!
Aww, from the photos I think I can see that your hair has been a big part of what makes *you* feel *you*. All the different styles <3 It's probably going to suck to hear this, but I think it's time. Looking at the sheer amount of hair involved in the inspo, I think that isn't something you (or 99% of people!) can pull off. If you want to keep the playfulness what maybe might work is doing a buzz cut and then dying someting cool into it? You can always get rid of it all the way after.
And if I may be so bold, if the facial hair isn't required from an identity-confirming or similar point of view, it should go as well. (if that turns out to be the wrong decision, you can always let it grow back)
(apologies if identity-confirming isn't the right word, but I can't think of how else to say it. Just be sure it's not meant in a mean way!)
My advice: Trim that hair down to just a few mm. And please get rid of that beard. Instead I would prefer to lose some weight, that would benefit your facial features!
I actually love the skullet tbh, if you’re asking if it’s time ie are you balding then yes but I think it looks cool as long as you’re into an alt style
I'm pro mohawk, even if temporary. Was my first thought seeing your initial pics. While buzzing, see how it looks and go from there. Your cheeks are adorable.
Too receded at the front for the mohawk to work but you have a great head shape, bald will look good on you.
I'm an alternative dude myself and worried that shaving would lose part of my "look" but tbh, not having to stress about my hair any more outweighed all the hassle i had of keeping it.
I like your look with the short hair the most. The beard is to thin to really work with. I'd go for clean shave there. The hair is another topic i'd say go short definitely but how much is debatable. Tbh I don't quite know what your kind of nonbinary implies but I could imagine "balding" (don't know better english word) as a hairstyle would work pretty nice with your face. As always: just try, hair grows back.
My only advice is if you're going to keep the hair you need to actually do it everyday like that braid. None of this brushing out the waves and letting it flow free, that channels sadness/creepy person to me. Gel those cutls. Make an effort and it'll look fine. Same with color if you're going to color it you need to keep that color vibrant and not let it fade out or you end up looking like a broke ass scrub who hangs out at the gas station. That's my opinion for both men and women.
Your face and head are quite round which I actually think lends itself well to being bald! Tidy up the facial hair and you will have a good look overall 😃
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u/daxhaas 14h ago
Don't read beyond this comment.
Cut it off completely, include the mustache and the creature growing under your chin.
Send a photo here. Enjoy the love.
Good luck my friend, your new life starts today.