That's the root cause of a lot of the downstream stuff, and that's assuming there were literally no indicators of how this would go before they were married. If he had divorced her years ago he wouldn't be in this catch-22 type problem currently.
Also, as I said, he has access to lawyers. Pre-nups are a common thing. He either chose not to get one, or she pushed back on having one at all (which would be a red flag as mentioned above).
I feel for him, shit sucks. But, as I said, consequences.
A prenup isn't about screwing anyone, it's there to protect both parties. Terms in prenups can and often are negotiated. They can be changed later if needed and both parties agree.
I'd argue that everyone should have a prenup, especially if there are a lot of assets and money in the conversation on either (or both) sides. If the marriage never ends in divorce, it's just a piece of paper.
Also, I disagree fundamentally. Simply based off of stats, 1/3 of people ever married (in the US) end up experiencing divorce. When I buy a house, if I go into it knowing that there's a 1/3 chance that it burns down, I'd buy insurance, would you not? Do you think those 1/3 of people expected to end up in the 1/3 that are divorced? I'd say very few of them did.
You don’t trust your house to not burn down so you got insurance.
You obviously don’t trust the woman(man) you are marrying if you need to protect yourself. A relationship is built on love. And you can’t love someone without trust.
I think we just fundamentally disagree, and are not going to reach any agreement.
As I said, it’s not about trust. A prenuptial isn’t some ‘I don’t trust you’ indicator. It’s a protection mechanism for both parties.
I trust that my house isn’t going to burn down, I still have insurance on it. Shit happens. That’s what I’m saying. I don’t think acknowledging that shit happens in life is some indicator that someone distrusts their partner.
A prenup protects one party not both. If someone is a lot wealthier than the other. The reason why the prenup is in place it automatically creates a power imbalance.
“I can walk out of here tomorrow. With the house cars, business and checking account. You get nothing.”
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u/MistSecurity 4h ago
That's the root cause of a lot of the downstream stuff, and that's assuming there were literally no indicators of how this would go before they were married. If he had divorced her years ago he wouldn't be in this catch-22 type problem currently.
Also, as I said, he has access to lawyers. Pre-nups are a common thing. He either chose not to get one, or she pushed back on having one at all (which would be a red flag as mentioned above).
I feel for him, shit sucks. But, as I said, consequences.