@shabnamnasimi

I met a Persian girl online a year ago today. We instantly connected despite being in separate countries on different continents. We shared a lot of deep and emotional things with each other. In January she was really upset about what happened in her country to the point she started distancing herself from me. I tried to be understanding but at one point she lashed out at me and blocked me after she said I was asking too many questions. After that the war started and no matter how I tried I couldn’t get in contact with her. she is not in Iran but she has family there and was deeply impacted. I tried to let go of this friendship but I have not opened up to anyone that way in a long time and I cared for her. I don’t know what I’m looking for here. I am just sad today because it’s been one year since I met her. Thanks for listening. This is a burner account and I’ll probably delete this eventually.

For anyone who doesn't already know, Ghazaleh is facing deportation from Denmark to Iran. Are the Danish authorities blind?

Hi everyone! I posted here the other day about having a baby. I was not born in Iran but my parents were and I’m having a baby boy in January. One topic that is really stressing me out is whether or not to circumcise my son. My husband is not Persian but says he wants our son circumcised because he is. My parents also agree with him because they say it is cleaner and healthier. I feel all alone because I don’t want to do it. Am I overreacting? I know it’s common to do in Iran but I don’t feel good about doing it to my son.

اولین بار فقط هزینه یک قرار ساده رو پرداخت کردم.

اما خیلی زود به جایی رسیدم که برای حل یک بحران مالی بزرگ در خانواده مردی که دوستش داشتم، پول می‌دادم.

و عجیب اینه که اون زمان فکر نمی‌کردم اتفاق غیرعادی‌ای داره می‌افته.

در قسمت اول از قولی گفتم که سر میز رستوران شنیدم: «دفعه بعد من حساب می‌کنم.»

اما ماجرا خیلی فراتر از هزینه چند قرار بود.

هنوز اوایل رابطه بودیم که خانواده‌اش با مشکلات مالی جدی مواجه شد. من بخش قابل‌توجهی از هزینه‌های خانه و مشکلات اون دوره رو تأمین کردم.

هیچ‌کس از همون ابتدا مجبورم نکرد. خیلی وقت‌ها خودم پیشنهاد کمک می‌دادم.

چون عاشق بودم و فکر می‌کردم دارم به خانواده آینده‌ام کمک می‌کنم.

باور داشتم این شرایط موقتیه.

ولی بعد از اون بحران، مشکلات تموم نشدن. کمک برای هزینه‌های روزمره، مناسبت‌ها و نیازهای مختلف، کم‌کم به بخشی از زندگی‌مون تبدیل شد.

خانواده‌اش من رو عروس خودشون صدا می‌کردن. گاهی می‌گفتن مثل دخترشون هستم.

درباره خواستگاری و ازدواج برنامه می‌ریختیم. بستگان دیگه هم از رابطه‌مون خبر داشتن.

اون مرد بارها گفته بود که من آدم زندگی‌اش هستم و قراره آینده خوبی با هم بسازیم.

برای همین، من احساس نمی‌کردم دارم به آدم‌هایی غریبه کمک می‌کنم.

اما هر بار که قرار بود قدم جدی‌تری برای ازدواج برداشته بشه، یک مانع وجود داشت.

هنوز شرایط مالی مناسب نبود. هنوز باید کارهاش روبه‌راه می‌شد. هنوز باید صبر می‌کردیم.

و من فقط صبر نمی‌کردم.

داشتم برای حل همون مشکلاتی تلاش می‌کردم که دلیل عقب‌افتادن ازدواج ما بودن.

در این میان، اتفاق‌های کوچیکی هم می‌افتاد که خیلی زود از کنارشون می‌گذشتم.

مثلاً یک بار برای تولد یکی از اعضای خانواده‌اش هدیه‌ای تهیه کردیم.

هدیه قرار بود از طرف هر دومون باشه، اما هزینه‌اش رو من پرداخت کرده بودم.

خودم هم می‌خواستم طوری به نظر برسه که اون مرد هدیه رو خریده. نمی‌خواستم جلوی خانواده‌اش احساس کمبود کنه.

اون‌ها هم از وضعیت مالی فرزندشون خبر داشتن.

اما وقتی اختلافی پیش می‌اومد، گاهی می‌گفتن این کارها رو بچه خودشون انجام داده، نه من.

و اون مرد سکوت می‌کرد.

من هم اغلب سکوت می‌کردم.

نه اینکه ناراحت نمی‌شدم. گاهی موضوع رو بهش یادآوری می‌کردم، اما نمی‌خواستم دعوا بزرگ‌تر بشه یا شخصیتش در چشم خانواده‌اش آسیب ببینه.

من از دیده‌شدن سهم خودم می‌گذشتم تا اون احساس کمبود نکنه؛ اما وقتی سهمم انکار می‌شد، اون هم چیزی نمی‌گفت.

این فقط درباره هدیه نبود.

وقتی بین ما اختلافی پیش می‌اومد، گاهی خانواده‌اش می‌گفتن: «خودت این رابطه رو انتخاب کردی، پس مشکلاتش رو هم بپذیر.»

دلم می‌خواست همون آدم‌هایی که من رو دختر خودشون می‌دونستن، وقت ناراحتی هم کنارم باشن.

اما معمولاً خیلی زود از دلخوری‌هام می‌گذشتم.

چون دوستشون داشتم. چون نمی‌خواستم رابطه خراب بشه.

نمی‌خوام بگم هیچ محبتی از اون‌ها ندیدم. این درست نیست.

محبت می‌کردن، حرف‌های قشنگ می‌زدن و گاهی به اندازه توانشون برای من هم کاری انجام می‌دادن.

همین لحظه‌های خوب، امیدم رو زنده نگه می‌داشت.

ولی امروز می‌فهمم که محبت، جای تلاش و مسئولیت‌پذیری رو نمی‌گیره.

من فقط پول نمی‌دادم؛ از زمان، آرامش و انرژی خودم هم می‌گذشتم.

هر بار با خودم می‌گفتم فقط این مشکل حل بشه، بعد نوبت زندگی خودمون می‌رسه.

اما اون «بعد» مدام عقب می‌رفت.

وقتی به گذشته نگاه می‌کنم، می‌بینم چطور ناراحتی‌های کوچک، سکوت‌های مکرر و امید به وعده‌ها، کم‌کم به بخشی عادی از زندگی من تبدیل شدن.

من فکر می‌کردم دارم آینده مشترکمون رو می‌سازم؛ اما نمی‌دیدم چقدر از زندگی خودم رو در این مسیر از دست می‌دم.

و یک سؤال بود که اون زمان از خودم نمی‌پرسیدم:

اگه همه درباره ازدواج جدی بودیم، چرا هیچ‌وقت نوبت برداشتن قدم واقعی نمی‌رسید؟

Since 2003, Iran’s leadership has presented itself as opposing the weaponization of their nuclear program, and whether you believe them or not is not the question I am asking, but rather, I am asking if they made the decision to build nuclear weapons in 2003, or in 2018 when Trump withdrew from the nuclear deal, or even in 2020, when Qassem Suleimani was assassinated, could they have avoided this war which seems to be resuming?

This is not to say that making this decision would have been easy for the Iranian leadership, and they would have done it in secret, because otherwise America and Israel would have invaded or bombed the moment they found out, if it wasn’t too late. Also, the Iranian leadership, despite being authoritarian, is afraid of the people overthrowing them if the economy gets too unbearable. If they had built any nuclear weapons, they would have been sanctioned, like North Korea, or even worse with a direct embargo or blockade. I simply don’t believe a country like Iran could handle being isolated politically and economically like North Korea. It would have been a tough decision for them.

But would it have at least prevented direct war?

I am not saying Iran should have or not have nuclear weapons, because I personally believe no country should have nuclear weapons, but I am asking, in terms of geopolitics, would it have prevented the war if they had nuclear weapons?

Hello,

I need some advice regarding iranian men and their culture or perspective on dating women.

I am based in Eastern Europe.

I met an iranian guy randomly at a bus station in my country, and we started talking because we were both waiting for a bus which had huge delays. He is 40 years. I am 35.

We talked for about 20 minutes and i enjoyed his presence and conversation. He asked for my phone number when he left saying he is happy to have met a new friend.

After that he messaged me good morning and good night every day and also we scheduled to meet for coffee. He also started giving me compliments or say romantic things on whatsapp, that in my opinion you say only to your wife or soulmate. He said he missed me only after 2 or 3 days. I understand he is interested in me and that he likes me but all these romantic replies are turning me off. Why?

1. You don't know me, let's not establish a romantic connection before there is one.

2. I don't know how to reply to these, it feels like he is saying those things just to make me like him. He is from a totally different culture so i have no idea.

3. I asked him about it and he said that is just how he feels and that he will not hide these feelings. That i am an amazing person, that he feels good just thinking about me, etc etc.

The coffee date went well and he did not say silly things face to face, only in writing. But he did buy me a red rose on the first date and acted like a gentleman. That i appreciated. He seems to be open minded and not religious which for me is super important.

1. Is this behaviour common or expected in men from Iran?

2. I kinda understand that he is pursuing me in the traditional sense, but if i want to know a man, i want to know the real him, not a mask. Is he just a romantic man or just trying to make me like him through these behaviours just to win me over? Because i do not like to rush or force things.

3. Do men in Iran have relationships and sex outside marriage? He said he was never married. He is a good looking guy so I don't think finding a woman would be a problem for him. I asked him if he's ever been in a relationship and he answered that relationships before me were just misunderstanding. So i feel he avoided to answer, maybe because he is afraid to tell me the truth? I have no idea.

I like him and i would like to get to know him more, but the above is turning me off. I am confused if this behaviour is a cultural thing, or this is just who he is as a person.

TL;DR: met an Iranian guy, went on a date, confused about his romantic perspective and messages.

@shabnamnasimi

If there is enough Iranian diaspora in the US army, then the US can send these diaspora soldiers for a ground invasion in Iran. Right?

I saw this message on X and wanted to share it here as well (originally posted by MasMas2171 on X):

We will not forget their names.
In the December 2025 massacre, thousands were killed. Many names are at risk of being forgotten.

The 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐈𝐫𝐚𝐧 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐜𝐫𝐞 website has so far registered over 7,500 names with sources and verification levels.

Goal: No name will be forgotten.

You can help completely anonymously (no account required):
• Add a name to the Everlasting Names
• Send information or sources for verification Privacy:
• No IPs are stored (only one-way, irreversible hashes)
• Name and contact are optional and only saved with your checkmark
• Tracking is off by default
• Videos are not loaded until you play them yourself
• You can remove photo locations
• Settings stay only on your device

Follow us (all with the same ID): X, Instagram, Telegram, and anonymous bot: theiranmassacre

Persian site: https://theiranmassacre.com/fa/

Every name is a life.