i was raised by two people who constantly belittled me and my feelings and i was also so sheltered that while i am independent in many ways, i can’t function without validation that everything i do and say is correct. i’m very insecure and never sure of myself. if you were in my position or still are, how did you teach yourself to be a more direct person? i’m very passive and that’s because when something upsets me or i know i need to say something i instantly start attacking myself and my motives to the point where i blame myself for everything and then i self sabotage and build resentment towards myself or others bc i can’t open my mouth. i know much of this has to come from just doing it, but im wondering how others have overcome this.

My very close friend is possibly going to be one of my managers and I do not know what to do. I want to tell my current manager that if he hires him, that I will be quitting, but I feel like it will affect the hiring process, BUT I also want him to know so he can open my position before I leave.

I love my friend to death but working under him will ruin our friendship. I have a strong work ethic, I love to work and I work hard. I take pride in my work and I dislike people that do not have a strong work ethic, especially in management. My friend is a bit on the "idc I am just here for my paycheck" attitude and it stresses me heavily. He is always on his phone, talking instead of working, late to work, behind on work, half-assing shit because he is behind. I love him and I look past it because we don't work together, but I won't be able to if that changes..

I really don't think that I have a chance against him as he is respected by my manager and has worked well under him before and I have less experience.

I am also just using this to vent too because my work is already so so so so stressful, I really just don't know how to feel or what to do. Trying to think it out, blah.

i (28f) am a crna (of 2 years). i make decent money. about 14k a month after taxes.

my husband (46m) had 3 kids before me. they are 15m, 11m, and 10m. m as in males not months. all boys. we have been together 8 years.

we have twin girls together. they're 4. he stays at home with them and his other kids.

he inherited some money (80k) from his dad when the girls were about a year old. in the last few years he's spent all but a few grand from his inheritance. before that, his dad would give him money every month.

his oldest is turning 16 next year, and i know he expects a car. which unless i pay for, he won't get.

his youngest is starting middle school next year, wants expensive "cool" shoes. (like 600 bucks for a pair). again is not going to happen if i don't pay for it.

he doesn't make his own money but tells his ex wife he can pay for vacations with the boys for her. which wasn't an issue until recently because he's running out of money.

am i horrible for not wanting to pay for everything for his three boys?

how can i approach the conversation?

My mom suggested me to try baking. My first thought that it seems interesting. So she set me up for baking course in trade school and plans to start our own business after I graduate. She has that hope and dreams that we will make it. Unfortunately, that chance percentage is certainly be close to zero.

Who even wants to have a child that doesn’t do anything besides slacking off and scrolling on their phone all day? I don’t have an urgency to do assignments, despite having many missing ones. I keep either getting distracted by other things such as searching up random stuff (“how fast can a cockroach run?”, “how to draw body anatomy”, etc), endless scrolling in YT, or sit there and not doing anything. It feels like “side quest are more important than main one” strand of code are implanted in my head.

Ok, it’s time for baking assignment; all you need to do is to read each page thoroughly and answer the question. Simple, right?

But no, I often find myself reading a single paragraph countless times, zoning out, and feel like “pouring water in a cup that has a hole in it”. Instead, I put 100% of my attention into something unrelated.

I keep telling myself “Do you want to be homeless and a burden to your mother? No? Then get your ass up and try to put some effort.”

However, I ended up doing nothing. Right after I’m about to go to bed, I immediately felt guilty and went to my desk again. And guess what? It created a cycle.

I even set up a schedule for myself: 10 AM - read a book for 30 mins, 11 AM - complete baking reading hw, 2 PM - body anatomy drawing practice. But my mind always be like, “eh, don’t feel like doing it.” and neglects the whole thing.

I don’t know what other jobs I’d actually be productive with. My counselor suggested architecture, and I kinda like that idea. But I’m worried if I’ll not be investing time actively taking notes and studying.

Hi, (18F) here. So, it’s not like I’ve never dated before or done anything intimate with anyone- but most of my experiences were either traumatic or short-term and painful. Every time, I tell myself I hate the concept of love and I don’t care for it, yet I still long for it.

I understand that im only so young and I have SO much time left, but being in college surrounded by all these couples and knowing that my friends have always been in long-term relationships or always had simple love lives really hurts.

I’m sick of people telling me that it’ll come with time, I need to focus on myself, etc etc. I already feel so fulfilled in every other part of my life, EXCEPT for love. All i want is to find my person especially at this point in my life. I feel so broken constantly wondering if I’ll ever even get that in this lifetime. I just don’t know how to cope with these feelings. I feel cursed.

I’m 31 Female and my husband is 33. We have 4 kids and we both work and my parents help babysit them. This morning I found out that I am pregnant. My husband is currently asl and I don’t know if I should tell him tommorow or not since we are already scraping by and I don’t want to make this the straw that breaks the camels back.

I(18F) and my boyfriend(18M) have been in a 4 months relationship so far! I honestly don’t know how to start this but it’s a long story…

I’ll give you some context about our relationship without giving too much out. We are basically long distance but live in the same state, he lives about 5 hours away over the mountains, so he mostly drives over to me cause I’m not familiar with driving on the mountains yet, how sweet right! Anyways before we dated we only talked for about a week over text. And we clicked he wanted to meet me right away, and I did too!

He came over, we met and it was a little awkward at first but got used to each others presence (he was really kind and respectful) until we were settling down for some chill time together and he started to touch me. I froze really (I’ve never had sex or any intimate act before, he knew this) I didn’t say stop, or even to keep going. I just laid there. After he was done, it was kinda awkward at first (I had this gut feeling it was so wrong. I’m religious btw) but he reassured me and distracted me about something else. So I didn’t think much of it.

Other than that the date was really nice, he’s a super kind guy and I grown attached to him to this day. Which is why I need some advice from another party that isn’t biased.

We only get to see each other once a week mostly on the weekends cause we both work. So every time we saw each other he touched me like that.. (not every time) sometimes I may have led him on to do it but most of the time I never said yes. Nor did I say no.. I just hesitated(this is relevant)

I got tired of it and finally said no one time, he kept going. Pushing me, I kinda felt guilty and let him. After that day I told him how I felt, he immediately realized what he did wrong and felt bad about it for days! I thought he wouldn’t ever do it again without my consent… wrong

We were in the same bed together, chilling and I fell asleep against him (I didn’t mind cause he said he would go back to his own bed soon anyways) I don’t know full details cause I was half asleep but I woke up to him grinding against me I honestly thought it was a dream so I rolled over away from him and fell back asleep. Then I woke up not 1, not 2, but 3 more times to him doing the same thing. The 3rd time I told him to stop! Then went back to bed the 4th I kicked him out of the room. Like?!?! One of those times he even asked if he wanted to have sex with me. What? I said no that time. And honestly I was out of it, I was so tired.

Anyways
Now comes today: we had a stupid fight and it brought up how when I say no he doesn’t listen to me. I basically told him: “I feel like your ignoring my hesitations”
And he said “when have I pushed you to do anything besides that one time”
And I went off!
I send him a long paragraph basically about how every time we see each other you touch me, and try to push sex on me.

(Some context: I’m religious, so I wanted to wait until marriage to have sex. He knew this before we even met. I told him a couple times)
He took my V card anyways, even though I liked it. I was kinda scared at the same time. I had a pregnancy scare, and told him I’m done with sex, he did it 2 other times pressuring me. (Remember I’ve never done this before)

Today’s fight made me realize, maybe this kinda thing isn’t normal to have in a relationship ship, because besides those times it is a really good relationship so that’s why I’m torn. I really love this guy but I’ve been thinking.. maybe too hard. I want to trust my gut but I just don’t know.

I told him I want a break. So we are on a break until further notice. He agreed.
I also told him no. Sex. And if he can’t control himself then find someone else who likes it as much as he does.

He said he would change, for the second time (first time is when he felt guilty about going against my no) I just don’t know if I should believe him. Cause things like this sexual stuff (he’s has had in past relationships) I’m not to into, especially a lot of it. I just want a normal loving relationship

I don’t want to continue this if he doesn’t change. It’s already been 4 months, and I love him so much I just don’t know if he loves me for me. Or just to touch me.

Let me know please, and give me some advice on what to do with this!

Hi everyone. I want to hear your pov and advice regarding this. I'm 19f and a college freshman at my local university. I commute and live at home. It's been 2-3 weeks working as an olive garden server (first official job). So far the money is a little slow.

I have two conflicting mindsets about my job. On one hand, I want to keep working for financial independence and gain experience as a server in case I ever wanted to work at higher end restaurants in the future. Working has also taught me the importance of time management and learning to stay disciplined. On the other, due to me being in a sorority and other clubs, there are events and trips that are planned for the weekends. Some are back to back, like November 7 is a sisterhood retreat, and then the following weekend is a trip to UT Austin. This would conflict with my work schedule as I am required to work weekends, and it's very tempting for me to want to quit to go to these events. My pov is that I only live once, and this college life only happens once. Money will always be there, but memories and experiences will not. But I also know making this a habit is not a good idea for my future professional career, which I know would have way less flexibility.

My mom also owns a nail salon, so in the back of my mind that's a job I can always fall back on and learn the skills of to earn money. I am very fortunate to have this backup plan and I'm also very fortunate with the things my mom has provided me with. I'm also planning to apply to my nursing program next semester, so if I get in, I most likely won't work while being in nursing school starting in Spring 2028 (so I'll have a little over a year of working before then). I also plan on working as a CNA soon once I complete my state exams next month, so there is a good chance I may prioritize that job.

There's a possibility that I am wanting to go to both trips mentioned earlier, which are back to back. I know quitting to go on those trips is dumb and impulsive, but this is also all I've ever wanted in my college experience (which I didn't get in my small high school): making new friends, going on random fun trips, making fun memories.

I want to hear advice about this thinking and possible decision in the future. Give me constructive criticism, tough love, advice, anything on topic please. Thanks!

i worked at sephora and i loved it there because im passionate about makeup, but i lost it because i didn’t have a consistent way to work. i can’t find work at all not even a remote job. i think ive tried everything and it doesnt help that i live in the middle of nowhere, i am not exaggerating when i say theres nowhere to work. my ex cheated on me and im no contact with him & attempting to heal, but boredom always leads me to thinking of him. i quite literally have no friends and im starting to feel totally hopeless. i’ve turned to praying and all and have been going to church, working out, i read books but nothing seems to work. im supposed to start free online school but i have no way to go and take the admission test. im starting to seriously give up, has anyone here been through a similar period? what do i do?

F 25, Since I could remember I’ve slept so much I’ve spent time sleeping more than anything else, I sleep through the night doesn’t matter how many hours of sleep I get I’m still tired sleeping any chance I can get. I couldn’t stay up during school after school and now I can’t stay awake before or after work, my days off I can’t get anything done because I sleep all day. I think about times I was doing stuff all I wanted to do was sleep! I sleep so much I’ve had people genuinely think I’m lying about sleeping so much. It takes up so much of my time. I love sleeping don’t get me wrong but it feels like I’m addicted to it that’s the best way to put it. I never had a good bringing up full of fighting neglect and degrading I have ocd and have been diagnosed anxiety and severe depression that I also take stuff for, so I’m trying to figure out am I just addicted to sleeping or is my body genuinly run down? Idk but it wastes so much of my time I put so many things off to sleep, it’s all I can think about is how tired I always am. I could sleep for days and still wake up tired :/ I do drink caffeine often but it’s been breaking me out and ik it’s not good multiple times a day, everyday either. Anyways if anyone has any insight or can relate to what I’m talking about, have any tips lmk.

So for reference I have been to therapy on two occasions throughout my life. Once about 7-8 years ago, the other was 4 years ago.

The first therapist was a couples therapist and was somewhat helpful but ultimately my gf and I at the time stopped going because every time I would refer to therapy she would get pissed off so I stopped paying for us to go.

The second therapist I saw was after her and I broke up. We were together for 6 years, and I don’t feel like going into specifics but it has permanently scarred me. When I was seeing help from my therapist I was told that they were surprised I hadn’t unalived myself, which was unprompted. I stopped going right after that.

I find myself struggling a lot, online with many things, same as almost everyone else. I’m numb, like there are times I don’t feel anything at all and other times I’m overwhelmingly sad and just feel the need to cry. I don’t talk to anyone about this stuff because when I have it’s been used against me or it’s brushed off and people I know just don’t know what to say. I genuinely feel like I don’t have anyone to talk to about this stuff..

The point of this post is.. can anyone provide insight for if therapy helped them or if they faced similar struggles? With my experiences therapy hasn’t helped me and I’ve been afraid to go back and have tried to just live with everything, but it’s getting hard.

My husband (32M) and I (29F) have been together for nine years, married for four. We have a beautiful one-year-old daughter, and I’m currently 11 weeks pregnant with our second child.

My husband has always had an extremely high sex drive, but it’s more complicated than that. He describes his sexual desires as a need to “conquer” women. He seems to need the excitement of pursuing someone new, and without some kind of external sexual outlet, he becomes moody, depressed, and easily irritated. He genuinely believes he needs this to function and be happy.

Over the years, we’ve tried what feels like every possible arrangement to accommodate his needs. I’ve stretched my boundaries, tried to be understanding, and worked incredibly hard to make our marriage successful. But nothing ever seems to be enough.
This July, he attended a friend’s wedding without me. It was a child-free wedding, and our daughter was only 11 months old, so I stayed home with her.

At the wedding, he met a woman in her 40s who lives abroad but was visiting the United States. He described her as a therapist. They ended up having sex. I only found out when I was already 6 weeks pregnant. I think the heightened sensitively of pregnancy made me realize something was going on and I confronted him. (So for those following the timeline, I got me pregnant about a month after sleeping with her at the wedding).

Since then, they’ve developed an ongoing relationship. They text every day. He stays up late talking to her while I’m sleeping.

He has repeatedly assured me that he doesn’t want to replace me, and I believe him. He loves me, wants to remain married, and wants to raise our children together. He just also wants the freedom to pursue sexual experiences and relationships outside our marriage.

Most recently, he spent a week abroad with this woman. And here’s the part that is difficult to admit: I agreed to the trip.

I felt like I had very little choice. I knew how much he wanted to go, and I was afraid of what denying him would mean for our marriage. But I was also genuinely hopeful.

Part of me hoped that spending a week with her would satisfy his curiosity and that he would eventually tire of the relationship. Another part of me hoped that perhaps she would be a moderating influence on him. That having this outlet would make him happier, more patient, and more loving toward me.

I even imagined a future where this other relationship could fade into the background of my life. Something I knew existed but didn’t have to think about very much. If he could get what he needed elsewhere and come home to be a loving husband and father, maybe I could learn to live with it.

Instead, I spent the week at home watching our daughter while he went to wineries, pubs, fancy dinners, and explored a beautiful European city with another woman. All the kinds of experiences I would have loved to share with him.

I’m also working full-time and 11 weeks pregnant.
I am absolutely miserable.

I can’t sleep more than five hours a night. I wake up around 3 a.m. every morning with my mind racing, and I can’t fall back asleep. I’m exhausted, anxious, and heartbroken.

And the worst part is that I don’t even know who to blame. He told me what he wanted. I agreed to let him go. I hoped I could be the kind of wife who could tolerate this, and now I’m discovering that I can’t.

I don’t think he’s going to leave me for her. I believe him when he says he wants to stay married. But I’m starting to understand that the marriage he wants and the marriage I need may be fundamentally incompatible.

I love him. I love our daughter. I love our home and the life we’ve built together. I wanted so badly to grow old with this man and raise our children together.

I don’t want to start over. I don’t want to be a single mother with a toddler and a newborn. I don’t want to lose the family I’ve spent nine years building.

But I also don’t want to spend the rest of my life trying to convince myself that I’m happy with an arrangement that is destroying me.

If a friend told me this story, I know what I would tell her. But when I imagine actually leaving, I feel completely paralyzed.

How do you leave someone you still love, who says he still loves you, when the life he wants is fundamentally incompatible with the life you need?
How do you stop hoping that if you just become a little more understanding, a little more accommodating, or a little more patient, things will finally get better?

I have no chill. I’m overthinking, overanalyzing every text. I’m giving myself anxiety thinking that he’s more distant with texts than the week leading up to meeting. I can’t tell what is real and what my mind is warping.

If you have an anxious atttachment style when you are into someone, how do you deal? I can’t think about anything else. And then my mind goes and fucks me and tells me that he’s going to break contact and I’ll never see him again. It’s really awful to be in this position and not know exactly what he’s thinking and feeling.

I need to get a grip. Now. But idk how to silence anything that’s going on in my mind.

I (20f) and my boyfriend (25m) have recently fallen pregnant unexpectedly. Ever since he found out he’s been awful to me and hasn’t even seen me in going on three weeks. He keeps pushing me to abort the child however I don’t want to. I am pro choice however I don’t believe in abortion for myself. All I’ve ever wanted was a family. He’s exclaimed that he’ll hate me and the baby if I go through with this. He’s saying I’m trapping him however before I got pregnant he emphasized he WANTED a family in me. We weren’t using any conception methods. He knew I wasn’t on birth control and made no efforts to prevent the baby. He’s completely switched up on me and he’s giving the excuse that this all over an argument we had weeks ago where I insulted his music. He said I showed my true colors because I said he wouldn’t make it in the industry and his music is shit. I was mean about it and have continuously apologized. I am keeping this child however I don’t know what to do about him.

I’m desperate I need a job sooooOooo BAD I have been working at 15 an hour for about 3 years now doing front desk reception… before that i was a server
I miss serving so much but no one seems to be hiring at the moment!! I’ve looked and applied everywhere and so far have had no luck
i’m still in school but want to move out of my parents house but that means i need a great part time job does anyone have any recommendations??

My best friend and I (both late teens) have been extremely close for 5 years now, we went to different schools and still saw each other nearly every day, and she’s someone who knows pretty much all of me, including the embarrassing, unflattering, less glamorous parts of my life, and I genuinely thought I knew her just as well, so finding all of this out has been a massive shock.

For context, all of this happened within the first three days of her starting college. I recently found out that she’s apparently been drinking since high school, and I didn’t know she’d been drinking at all. She supposedly drank to the point of physically sickness occasionally then, and I had absolutely no idea any of this was going on. Whenever she was around me, she never seemed drunk or hungover, but maybe I wasn’t attentive enough. After going to college, it’s much more regular now apparently.

The most recent incident is what really concerns me. She doesn’t have a car on campus, and she wanted alcohol, and she ended up meeting a guy who was essentially her only way of getting it at the time. She had met him less than 24 hours earlier, and she went to his apartment alone, specifically because she wanted access to alcohol. He pursued her, and they ended up having intercourse, and this was her first time. She didn’t find him attractive, didn’t really want to do it, and that the sex itself was unfulfilling, but she wanted his alcohol.

I genuinely don’t care she had casual sex, it’s the circumstances surrounding it that worry me. She went alone to the apartment of a man she’d known for less than a day, with the sole intention of obtaining alcohol, and sex became the means of getting it. From what she told me, she verbally consented, but she didn’t even really want to have sex with him, but something she was willing to do to get alcohol. The mindset behind that is worrying to me.

He removed the condom with her knowledge, and she didn’t know that removal could be harmful at the time, only retroactively, which just goes to show how inexperienced she is in that regard. She only took Plan B and an STI test after one of our friends told her to, and refuses to take a pregnancy test.

She admits to being tipsy, but not the extent she couldn’t consent, and I don’t want to misrepresent what happened, but I can’t stop thinking about how little she seemed to want the actual sexual encounter and how much of it was apparently motivated by wanting alcohol. After this incident, she’s still drinking to the point of intoxication. She says she was disassociating during the sex and wouldn’t have consented if she was sober, shes lost a lot of weight and has been distraught since the incident.

What’s making this even more concerning is that another friend knew about her drinking before I did, my best friend told her about it the morning after this incident, and after a few weeks of gentle encouragement, that other friend straight-up told her that she might have a drinking problem and has to ease up on the alcohol, my best friend is in denial and doesn’t believe she has one, and is shutting down the conversation. Her use of alcohol isn’t the primary problem to me, but the lengths she’s willing to go to obtain it.

I only found out because she came to me about a $600 medical bill, she’d been told she wouldn’t be charged, but then she was charged anyway, and she asked whether there was anything I knew from a legal standpoint to make it go away, which makes me wonder about whether or not we were as good of friends as I thought.

I’m honestly struggling to process all of this. I didn’t even know she drank, and now I’m hearing that she’s been drinking since high school and sometimes drinks until she’s physically sick, and she’s apparently willing to go to these lengths to get alcohol, and she doesn’t seem to recognize that any of this is concerning. I thought we had mutual openness, and I don’t know whether she came to me because she trusts me or because she thought I’d be able to fix the immediate problem.

I want to help her and I’m trying to find resources and figure out what I can realistically do, but I can’t force her to acknowledge a problem she doesn’t believe she has. What is the best I could do for her in this situation, while still maintaining healthy boundaries?

My husband used to use substances. As far as I am aware it’s a used to. But one evening while I was at work there is a clip and some audio of a stranger kid/man on our video running down the driveway. The stranger disappears out of camera view. My husband was the only one home. Someone says “how’s it going?” to the stranger. The stranger then walks away from the camera without the object. I then that weekend find a random t shirt I do not recognize in my hamper as a side note. And within a week of this my husband starts having Ed issues in the bedroom. Is this suspicious? My husband says he has no idea what happened or who the stranger was. When asked more questions he says “idk.” Any advice on what I should do?

before I learned what “sex” is, my mom would accuse me of doing inappropriate things with my siblings. If I remember correctly it started when I was 6 years old and and I wanted to sleep next to my dad cause I missed him a lot when we were away from him (my dad used to live in a different country from us so we would only see him on vacations) but then the second my mom heard that she accused me of wanting to do inappropriate things with my dad and that my dad is actually horrible and wants to touch me “inappropriately”. I’m now 20 years old and this still has not stopped, she still has those beliefs and still claim that she KNOWS what we are doing with each other. When we were younger she would make us go to therapists, and she beforehand would tell them that her children do inappropriate things with each other, then when the therapist would ask us if that’s true or if we have seen each other do things like that together we would all say no and that nothing like this have ever happened before, the therapist would then diagnosed her with OCD, then she gets upset and claims that we are “planning” this with the therapist, even though we went to many different therapists and they all would say that it seems she has delusional disorder of some sort.

this type delusion is not only with the incest thing, she also claim the all people are plotting against her and want her to fail in life, or that we put cameras in her room to spy on her and we track all her devices to see what she’s doing, she also claims that we have so much power that we provide for other peoples living and housing (even though we’re hella broke and we’ve always been struggling financially).

The thing that me and my siblings came to the conclusion of is the our mom is a narcissist, because when me and my siblings started to actually develop a close relationship with each other and put all of the weird shit she would say to each of us, she was basically telling us things to make us hate each other, so that way she has power over us, so that all of us are isolated and no one else could reach out to one another and help each survive her abuse. But when we started to connect and develop our own thoughts about her and that what she doing is abuse, we become protective of each other, so now she feels like she is the isolated one and now she says that this is what she means when she says that everyone is plotting against her, and how she misses when we were younger and in need of her.

Did anybody experience something like this? I’ve searched a lot and I don’t see anybody has and experience like this, I’ve seen people who say how their parents say that they’re “whores” and that they “have sex with everybody“ when they don’t. (my mom also has that belief that all of us have sex with anyone and everyone which we don’t) but the sex with the siblings part is the one I don’t have any logic explanation for how she came up with that , because nothing like this has ever happened between any of us. I don’t know if this has any correlation to it, but my dad was very verbally and physically abusive towards her and us, and he cheated on her multiple times, they got a divorce then got back together again “for the kids”. I know that my dad is horrible and I still don’t like him but no sexual abuse has ever happened to any of us from him so that’s the confusing part. If anybody has an idea of how that can come or what kind of condition this is that would be helpful. And no my mom wouldn’t go to therapy because she doesn’t believe that there is anything is wrong with her.

I am in my third semester at community college and I'm due to be in college for another 4 semesters. It seems neverending and I have to work during.

I'm fortunate enough to work part time but I'm really having some mental health struggles. I'm in a level 3 of a 4 level class (meaning I've already passed 1 and 2) and I'm just having a hard time getting the work done at all.

I have the time and the space but I'm so exhausted and depressed I'm just not able to get it done. I have quite a few late assignments.

If I don't pass this class, I won't be able to retake it until next fall which is something I don't want to do. Plus I've never failed a class before so I'm feeling a lot of shame.

I know I need to tell my professor that I'm struggling but I don't even know what to say? "sorry I'm sad and tired all the time so I haven't been turning in work. I have parts of every assignment done but none completed"

What can I say to my professor so he knows I'm struggling? I'm working with a therapist on the sadness and exhaustion so that I can get back to a place where I'm getting work in the first time.

I’m a 24-year-old guy, and I’ve been a virgin my entire life because of my religious beliefs. I believe in waiting until marriage, and I’ve followed that throughout my life.

However, lately, I’ve been wondering about something.
I do like physical intimacy. I like cuddling, kissing, hugging, holding hands, and the romantic aspects of being with someone. I want a romantic relationship and the emotional connection that comes with it.
But when it comes to actual sex, particularly penetration, I honestly don’t feel much interest in it. It’s not that I don’t want intimacy or a relationship. I just don’t feel particularly interested in the act of sex itself.

I’m 24 now, and I sometimes wonder whether this is normal or whether something is wrong with me. Since I’ve never had sex, I don’t know if my lack of interest comes from never having experienced it, if it’s simply how I’m wired, or if my feelings might change when I’m in a committed relationship.

I’m also wondering whether this could cause problems in a future marriage. I don’t want a future partner to feel unwanted or unsatisfied, and I wouldn’t want our expectations around intimacy to be incompatible.

For context, I’m not saying I dislike physical affection or that I don’t want to fall in love. I genuinely want those things. It’s specifically the sexual aspect that I don’t feel drawn to.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? Especially men who feel this way, or people who have waited until marriage for religious reasons.

Is this normal? Can you have a fulfilling romantic relationship or marriage if you have little or no interest in sex?

( Sorry for the yap) Hello everyone, i am a 15 year old and i really love to walk. Espically since the weather has been getting cooler. But my parents ( my mom mostly) are absoultly paranoid that i will get snatched up. I do not live somewhere unsafe. I been in this suburban neighboorhood for 8 years and there has not even been a robbery. There are sidewalks everywhere and its not at all heavy traffic. The closest i have been outside without my parents staring me down was when i volunteer to wash my mom car in our driveway. Even then i had to beg her and she stayed outside with me before i finally got her to go back inside.

There was a time where it finished raining and it look gorgeous outside. I really wanted to get a photo, and i couldnt go in the backyard because it was all houses so i asked my mom if i could go to our front yard and get a photo. I told her it wont last more than 30 seconds, i explained why the backyard wouldnt work and begged. We also have two security cameras. She said hell no. Like i was going to be snatched up in 2 seconds on my driveway.

I want to go on walks but last time i asked my mom made me do it in our backyard, with a bunch of groves in the ground. I was walking in circles and my ankles hurt alot.I made this post because i have been feeling very bored and lonely and like i was gaining weight and because i was talking to my friends that are my age. I was telling a group that i was feeling trapped in my house and how i wanted to lose weight and they all suggested to go take a walk outside or to go ride my bike and watch the sunset. I said i wasnt allowed do that. Then they all stared at me with some level of pity and horror. I truly felt like a outsider.

I guess i could also ask my mom to go with me, but then my little siblings would have to go and i would have to keep a eye on them. And i dont want to go with my mom for personal reasons. Another time my friends wanted to go hang out at this outdoor strip mall, where we go to the cinema then go to chilis after then go to miniso. I told my mom about chilis and at first she was very hesitant. She said she had to go scope it first. I was thinking, "okay mission kinda succesful" we went there and she almost made me not go, because chilis wasnt a straight walk away from the cinema, and because google maps told her it was a 4 min walk. I almost went down in tears. But she let me go bc i showed her google maps was wrong and it was actually a 1 min walk in a straight line.

I dont know i feel so left out, none of my friends go through this, even the ones with strict parents. But i guess what i should account is that im my parents first kid, while my other friends are all middle/younger siblings so their parents are more lenient. I understand but im 15 years old and i cant go on walks to feel the breeze on my face? To watch the sunset, i watch 10 year old kids skating around all over my neighboorhoof multiple times and im watching through my window like a stalker. Its like that one spongebob meme of squidward watching patrick and spongebob laughing while he gazes sadly through his window.

I need help on convincing my parents on letting me outside. Anything will be welcomed.

For reference I’m 21F, and although beauty is objective, I would say I am pretty attractive and I keep up with my appearance heavily (hair, makeup, body). When I was younger in high school I had guys lining up wanting to be my boyfriend. And for reference I’m the same height and weight I was when I was in high school. But currently I haven’t had a guy pursue a serious romantic relationship with me since I was 17. I don’t have a problem attracting men, just men who want to take me seriously. Currently, I seem to attract guys who want to cheat on their girlfriends with me, guys who just got out of relationships and are still hurt by their ex and are not looking to take anyone seriously, and guys who just want to add me to their roster. It seems as though I have to beg to be taken on a date and not just used for s*x, I’ve never had a valentine or gotten flowers, I’ve never gotten spoiled, and the tremendous amount of disrespect I get when I reject a guy’s sexual advances is just horrible. For reference I’m a black girl living in puerto rico, and although I have pulled a fair amount of men here, the beauty standard is mainly white, not black hispanics. So I’m very cautious with dating here so I’m not used as an “experiment”. But today I was responding to a guy who DM’d me and who was pressuring to see me, so I said he could see me if he plants a date, then he starts going off on me about how he doesn’t even like black girls and that my vagina looks ugly and that I’m fat (I’m 110lbs). And then he proceeded to send me pics of another girl he’s been with (white), and talk about how much prettier she is than me. And then finally he “apologizes” and says he didn’t mean it, and proceeds to beg me again for photos of myself, so I blocked him. Now I have PTSD to even date another guy from here because I will never know if I’m 100% their type or if they’re just using me as an experiment or a placeholder. I just feel like a lot of guys here want to show off the white girls as their main girl, but then use me and “keep me on the low”. And I have always been confident in my skin and would never trade being black for any other race, but I would be lying if I said how I’ve been treated these last few years hasn’t heavily negatively impacted my self esteem. And my dream has always been to be a young mother, and I feel like I am slowly giving up hope on that because I don’t know if I will find a good father for my child, one who actually respects me and loves me. Why do men treat me like this?

I need some advice on what to do about my boyfriend because I am in complete shock right now.

We are both seniors in high school, but I am completely new to the school this year. We just started dating about a month ago. He is naturally super friendly with a lot of girls, which already makes me a bit anxious. Recently, some drama started because his female close friend (who he has a recent history with from right before we started talking) was allegedly flirting with him. I confronted him about it, and he told me he blocked her and wouldn't talk to her anymore.

Well, my absolute closest friend sees everything. She just told me that today, he was actively mouthing stuff to that girl across the room, and he was also talking to another girl I explicitly asked him to stop talking to last night. He promised me he would stop, and then immediately did it anyway the next day. He clearly thinks he's being slick or that we don't talk, which is just dumb.

To make matters worse, he told me when we met that he just moved here last November. But my best friend just told me she has literally known him since the 7th grade. He completely fabricated an entire lie about when he moved here for absolutely no reason.
I feel like he is being incredibly disrespectful, treating my boundaries like a joke, and lying straight to my face. I'm thinking about just leaving it alone for a minute to let my best friend gather more evidence of him digging his own grave, but I am also just so disgusted by the lying.

Is this as disrespectful as it feels, and how should I handle confronting him about the timeline lie?

I am a disabled adult woman who cannot work. I inherited my childhood home from my mother when she suddenly passed away several years ago. My aunt (60f) is in good health and takes great care of herself and me as my live in caretaker. I cannot put into words how thankful I am that she has been willing to do this for me. She often worries about taking care of the house, which I understand; It's an old house and sometimes needs repairs and yardwork is a thing that needs to be done... However before moving in with my mother and I before my mother passed always rented which has made her understandably biased toward renting. My issue is that we both are aware that one day she won't be here anymore and she keeps pressing me to sell the house and start renting. I don't like getting confrontational with her because I love her dearly and can't stand to see her upset especially after all that she's done for me... The problem with this is that I don't know how to tell her that I don't feel safe with selling the house and moving to a rental for several reasons. One of which is the economy as it it for selling a house and the other is that I'm unwilling to rent because I know that if I can't for some reason pay rent due to a medical problem since I can't work and will have to greatly budget once she's gone I'll end up Homeless, Disabled, and Unable to work.

How am I supposed to explain all of this in a tactful and nonconfrontational way next time she brings it up?

I liked this girl since the first time I saw her in 8th grade. We became friends in freshman year and in sophomore year we kindof did a dating with no label for about a year. Then we dated for a month and she broke up with me because she lost feelings.

I got distant because I really loved her and I didn’t talk to her all summer basically. Once school started we kindof started talking more and now we fine I guess. Every time I see her outside of school I catch feelings again. Like I jsut like her, I like being with her, I want to date her.

She’s with a guy tho, not dating but she says she likes him but he jsut doesn’t fulfill her I guess whatever that means. Anyways idk I got her flowers and these cookies since she was having a bad day and complained about that guy not getting her flowers for 2 months and that made her really clingy.

I like her so i immediately just thought of like I need to distance myself but I guess I did it in a way that was so strong because she notice and got upset. I did this so I wouldn’t get my feelings hurt I guess. I went over to her house a few days ago and we were just laying on her bed and I was sleeping on my side whenever she like went into a position where she was the little spoon and I was the big spoon.

I tickled her and we both laughed and I felt just a sense of freedom from all the stress of just school and work but now I don’t know what to do. She like keeps slightly flirting with me and It’s judt so hard to keep my emotions out of it, I don’t know what to do.

I know that this is weird but does anyone have any advice on what I should do.