I have some very horrific se/ual trauma, which i probably cannot put on reddit as I'll likely get banned.. but I've started to read er/tic horror books as a sort of exposure therapy, I'm also watching films that was literally my life for numerous years till I got free (hostel, skin, I spit on your grave, sl/ughtered v/mit dolls.. to give you an idea 🫠) I've also played cyberpunk 2077 and Evelyn's storyline was very close to my life, but with more cool tech and better clothes ovbs haha.
So I'm looking for books that are not really a romance but more f/ck t/rture m//der kinda thing, or female that takes a g/ry revenge. I have a kindle but I also like getting hardback books so either format is fine with me :)
If it's f//ish/k/nk related, pleaassseeee can it be written by someone who understands what that lifestyle is actually like 😅😆
It's helping me deal with my memories in a more controlled manner as I am starting to draw and paint my emotions or images that are snapshots of what i can remember when I am able to semi regulate an episode.
My goal set by my psychiatrist is to write a book review on 3 scenes and 3 characters that represent my trauma, one of the bad people and a moment of character that reflects my actions in a situation that happened. Comparing fiction to reality, i think their goal is for me to feel proud for surviving, like a hero final girl or to feel brave for still being here but idk, they throw a curveball at me like every session 😆
Sorry if this brought the mood down, i know it seems silly but I'm really proud of the changes I've made in myself and how far I've come from the 'meat market' to now rebuilding my soul :)
Thank youu 🖤