Part of me miss it and other part despise it. For me it’s different abit. My drive to smoke is ruled by my mental health. Good mental health for mean means good immunity against all kinds of abusive drugs but when i get depressed or maniac it weakens my defenses and the drugs habit can hijack my brain and willpower.

I learned the hard truth i am mentally ill and i either manage with meds and achieve 65% satisfaction or gamble with drugs and get 1000% satisfaction followed by huge toll in all areas of life mentally psychologically health money dignity.

Last time i smoked i ended up in jail so id rather stick to my 65% satisfaction

Some people can manage their life with weed but not me
Some can hit the breaks when using but not me
Other can moderate their use but not me

I have relapsed the last two days, and tonight I decided that I was going to throw my lighter away tonight when I got done smoking and that this WILL be the last time, I went and felt for where I had out my lighter, and it turns out I had both if them with me, the ine I kept in the car, and the one that I had at home that I thought to myself that I would have to throw away when I got home..

I definitely feel like that was my sign from the universe, that this time needs to actually be the last time, and that I can do this, and that I absolutely need to do this.

I’ll start to quit on Friday. This time, I thought I would go somewhere else to ease the stopping process. Have you ever tried to quit weed by going away from it? What happens if I come back and want desperately to buy some again?

This is the third time I've quit, and I can feel this time is different. I feel motivated to make changed like I never have before. I folded my laundry for the first time in a year. I started reading a book for the first time in at least 7 years. I'm motivated to eat healthy and get exercise every day. I have cravings but I haven't for a second had to stop myself from going to the dispensary. I have no desire for weed anymore, even when I'm experiencing a craving, which might sound contradictory but it's true. I am on a new med which is definitely helping (not advising anyone here on meds, talk to your doctor). I'm just done with this stuff and it feels great.

There's hope, people. I was hopeless. I'd basically resigned myself to smoking all day, eating garbage and sitting on my ass doing nothing until I die at 50 of a heart attack. It felt like life was meaningless. And that was like four days ago. How fast things can change! Maybe it is in an objective sense but I have hope now that I can make my own meaning out of my life, which I never thought was possible for me. I don't know what the next steps are but I think I'm gonna turn out okay.

I haven’t smoked in 10 days. Cold turkey. I’ve been a chronic smoker for 10+ years (hitting the cart in the middle of the night type sh*t) and by the end of it, all I would feel when I got high was that I didn’t want to be high anymore. It felt like I literally was involuntarily smoking. I would tell myself I don’t want to do this as I was lighting up a joint. It made me lose all faith in myself.

Ive “quit” a few times here and there over the years, but each has ended with me saying “oh, I just need some relief tonight,” and suddenly, I’m back to smoking all day every day again. It’s a brutal cycle.

I’m going through a massive heartbreak, and generally just a huge life transition that feels scary and overwhelming, and tonight it felt like it got the best of me. I’ve been so proud of myself for getting through these first few days (if you know, you know), and generally feeling SO good not smoking, but I almost convinced myself that i could smoke just this once tonight so feel a little less heartbreak.

Anyways, I read a sh*t ton of posts here, reminded myself that being high all day, everyday made me feel like a zombie, and I know if I smoked tonight I would have to restart this all over again. I’m proud of myself for making this decision, it wasn’t easy but makes me think that I can actually stick with quitting this time. Every time I’ve had this thought before, I’ve caved. Anyways, just wanted to share :)

I’m on day 1 again with no appetite. I’m thinking about doing a water fast to get thru withdrawals faster, maybe like 96 hours. Does anyone have any success with this?

So after a brutal and stressful day 3, I didn’t cave and made it to day 4…(farthest I’ve ever reached) and now I’m noticing my hair becoming rougher and thinner. does the withdrawal also impact hair?? thankfully my stomach’s been fine. and things are okay ish now (apologized to my family for my outburst yesterday) but I feel like I’ll never be happy inside. I really hope this passes soon. This experience has given me motivation to never even touch this thing again. no wonder it’s called the devil’s lettuce. I’ll stay strong and not cave in… that “friendly stranger” store is more like “stranger danger” now!!!

i used to joke when i felt stressed and I guess that part of my personality is coming back now

For years Ive been struggling with this problem. I will get very anxious, for whatever reason. Then, I will get have an episode of illness. I will have extreme abdominal cramps. I will have a strange sensation in my head. Its hard to describe, not quite a headache, not quite a migraine (or maybe it is a migraine?). Big brain fog. Exhaustion but insomnia. And muscle tremors. These episodes will last for a day sometimes or sometimes weeks. Its been ruining my life how frequently these episodes get in the way of having a life. And then I go to the doctor. They never find anything. I always look perfectly healthy to them.

Until the most recent time, it was suggested I might have CHS. That the weed is doing this to me. I got defensive, I got angry. No! Weed is benign! It doesnt do anything bad to me! It has to be something else! But the more I thought the more I felt ashamed. I have been having my life ruined and I wouldn't even entertain the idea that sobriety would help me?

Im not positive its CHS. Im not positive sobriety will fix my episodes. But for an entire decade I have used chronically. I will stay sober during work. Then i get home and I rip the bong or pen impulsively. I dont know how much I hit but its a lot. Its not fun anymore. I just feel like I have to do it. I never wake up with any energy I cant keep any of my good habits down. I want to be healthy. And theres no way 11 years of constantly high dosing myself with drugs with basically no breaks ever under any condition will help me.

Yesterday was my first day without. I feel awful. Withdrawal is kicking my ass. My head feels funny. I didnt sleep well. I cant think clearly. I feel so anxious. But I want to be healthy. I want to live my life. But the withdrawal is already kicking my ass. Curious if any of this seems familiar and if any of you recognize these symptoms from my recurring health episodes. Also is tapering a good idea for quitting? I want to do whatever will make my recovery the best.

Guys, im on Day 2. This shit sucks, withdrawals are happening, not enough sleep, feel unmotivated, no energy, just boredom and lethargic most of today. Havent really had an appetite either. Hoping this all passes, feeling this way is encouraging to never smoke again.

Might sound wild, but it was the only way I could do it. Smoked every single day since age 14 and am now 47. Carts from morning to night except while at work.

Paid out of pocket for private detox and the best decision of my life. I have mental health stuff and feared quitting could cause an episode (bipolar) so wanted medical care. They gave me meds, support and counseling and I'm six days clean. I don't even crave it anymore.

If you can't stop on your own, it's worth it.

Hello, I was a very heavy smoker from ages 15-19. I smoked a bunch of carts and had a bong I used frequently. I am now in the process of quitting and afraid of the possibility I have already given myself permanent brain damage since I smoked during such a crucial part of brain development. I was a dumb teenager and didn’t really think about it at the time or how much my heavy usage could affect me. Now that I’m in college I notice myself struggling more than I used to, I mean obviously the work is much harder but the big problem is retaining information and just having my head be clear. Also in conversations I find myself not being able to think of words, and just a bunch of brain fog. I’m afraid this is irreversible.

I've been smoking pretty much daily since I was 14. In the last few years I have started to work away for extended periods and I am totally fine without weed. A bit restless etc. But nothing major.

Yet as soon as I land back in the UK, I'm smoking from morning to night. Has anyone else experienced this?

The funny thing is, I often work in Spain where its legal and accesible but I still wont buy it.

i’ve been a heavy daily smoker for over 4 years now and recently it just turned on me and i had an awful panic attack and decided there and then to quit for the time being. im on about day 7 now.

i’ve got this awful neck and upper back pain alongside daily headaches. is this normal?

my increased anxiety and overall health anxiety has got a lot worse and I keep spiralling that something is wrong.

Is it possible to have THC withdrawal symptoms from a 10 mg drink? I have about half a can each night. Today I feel super tired and last night drank less than half to stop. IDK, I would love to hear your thoughts.

First of all sorry for my bad english. So my girlfirend and i are together for almost 8 years now when we met i was already smoking regularly and over the time it went into daily use and she used to smoke with me sometimes on weekends. Before Meeting me she had never used it but i convinced her to try it with me. She never had a Problem with being with me and staying sober either when she had to drive the Car in the next days. I went to rehab for 6 weeks to quit because i couldnt do it on my own and ive been clean for 10 months now. She met with some friends before to smoke but i made it clear that i dont wanna be near any of that so im not gonna come over then. I dont have a problem with her smoking as long as i am not there then and bescause that rearely happens. Maybe every 2-3 months. Now this weekend we planned that i come over after work and we spend the weekend together cus her mom is out of town. But now she tells me that she and her sister are gonna smoke before i come to her after my work. I dont know what to do now go there and try to live with it or tell her that im gonna stay home. My head is really looking for excuses to just smoke with them the full on ,,ahh once cannot hurt right, lets just try it" and the ,,i can moderate it now"... I know she wont let me and i really dont want to but im sure im not gonna have a fun time then I know im just gonna be thinking about that she is high and that i could be too. Im really trying to normalize other people using near me as that happens a lot in my City as germany leaglised it now. I dont want to hurt her and i want to spend time with her and staying home the thoughts will be the same but im really scared that my brain is gonna trick me into using while she is busy or something. I have been near other people smoking and it was never a problem but with her the memories of us smoking together just seem too good. Damn i wrote way more than i wanted to. Even if nobody reads all this it good to have these thoughts written down somewhere. Take the challenge or stay at home. Either way im gonna feel the cravings. I do really want to go to her to Show myself that i am strong enough to stay sober. She really is the best Support I have and i told her it is fine if she wants to smoke now and then and i know i can talk to her about it without any arguments I just want to know what you think about what i should do.

Anyone notice their skin get better?

How did it affect you

Hi guys its been 28 days already i quitted hashish and nicote that i use to hit on bong since then a lot thing happened i mean i hardly slept like 5 6 hrs every day also fragmented one i dream a lot sometimes so vivid like 4 5 times at one night in between 6 hours i wake up and sleep and dream again i just wanted to know who had the same experience while you all were quitting please reply me that when should and how many more days might take to get a good sleep like a long sleep other than that i am going very good no cravings some time i get anxious because i know that is it lack of good sleep

Hi. You may have saw my Reddit post about asking if withdrawal could make me stop walking etc.. and you guessed it no. I have a tumor on my spine. I will be having surgery soon and hopefully it’s nothing to worry about

Hello! I'm smack dab in the sloppy middle were nights are long and mornings are anxiety ridden and just exhausting. But, i will say that I have noticed that I can, with enough breathing and excerise, actually feel normal and even good for a few hours a day. Im able to laugh and even enjoy my hobbies a bit. However, my brain seems to want to do nothing but replay every mistake, bring every fault and consider every future problem all at once. It helps a bit to realize that its actually the addiction trying to beat me down so im weak and vunerable. Anyway, just wanted to share that I am noticing some moments of relief and even levity this point.

Hello all you lovely people on the internet 🖖🤖

As the title suggests, I stopped smoking cannabis three weeks ago and I am, somewhere deep among all this anhedonia very proud of that ✊

I’ve been on and off for years since 2014, then I stopped for a longer period in 2022 while getting screened for ADHD, started taking medication for that which resulted in a clarity my life never had seen before. I was able to read, focus heavily on tasks that previously seemed impossible etc.

My girlfriend at the time somehow convinced me that I was just an addict seeking out other ways to get high, and amongst other abuse from her, that shattered confidence led me to start smoking again (she was a heavy smoker herself, way «worse» than me).

Since then, I’ve been taking medication but I’ve also smoked more heavily than I ever did before.

Been trying to quit many times since then - the longest I abstained was last year in October for about a month.

Over this last year I’ve been struggling with how depressive I think it is that I’m still smoking even though it clearly has adverse negative effects in my life.

On the night before 1st of October this month, I did a weird thing in the forest where I have this old cabin that I’ve spent a lot of time in these last years, basically running away from all my problems.

I lit a huge bonfire, got naked and rubbed dirt in my face as I jumped over the fire multiple times before I threw my remaining stash into the flames - I immediately regretted my decision and got so frustrated that I eventually started crying over how pathetic I felt for feeling this, what kind of pagan fuckmongery had I just done? 🫣🌲
As I looked up from the bonfire, I saw a squirrel sitting on a branch of an old pine tree a short distance away from me, just staring, judging me silently.
Then out of a clear, starry night sky - it started raining heavily, and it felt really cleansing like nature was crying with me.

I realised I hadn’t been able to cry like this for years, and that made me cry even more.

This was three weeks ago, and I am still very determined to keep going - but the last three nights I’ve been getting a total of about 12 hours of sleep, and it freaks me out at this point. It feels like my eyes are just shut but there is a steady stream of thoughts constantly going through my head, I toss and turn in bed and get super conscious of my breathing, if I am doing it right, and sometimes these thoughts make me hold my breath which makes no sense at all - but it’s like I’m replacing my breathing pattern with thoughts..? 😬

I also feel really negative towards everything, nothing sparks any interest, only at surface level.

If I force myself, I can probably think of some of the positive changes as well, things I KNOW are positive - but I don’t feel them. Am I permanently damaged?

I don’t really have much cravings, I have even been around friends that still smoke and I don’t even consider parttaking in their sessions. I have a lot of repressed anger and sadness, and when I feel those feelings is probably my biggest triggers. I am afraid that anger will eventually push me into «fuck everything»-mode which will make me smoke up again. The mood swings are insane.

I am afraid of it all, even posting this now because of second thoughts regarding sharing so much - Can someone please share some words of encouragement and good tips for continuing? 💚

And fuck that squirrel! 😤

I've been doing pretty well on this latest attempt. Sober for 18 days, and feeling good. Been keeping myself occupied and feeling sharper every day. But, my friend group has big plans for Halloween. We're going into the city (New York) and planning on barhopping. One of my best friends has been seeing this girl that lives in Brooklyn and she's getting us into a friend's party later on that night. I've been told that this friend throws "crazy parties."

I really want to go and have fun with my friends, but obviously I'm worried for myself. I really want to stay sober, but I can already feel the little voice in the back of my head telling me that it's ok to let loose, it's Halloween, I'm young, etc, etc. I can't really allow myself to drink, not because I have issues with alcohol consumption (I don't really enjoy it much), but because when I drink, I inevitably also smoke. Obviously weed is legal in NYC, and I assume that there will be plenty to be had at the party. Plus lots of dispensaries that will presumably be very open for business on Halloween. None of my friends are big into drinking or smoking, but they do tend to go pretty hard when they give themselves the opportunity. We all live a train ride away from the city, so nobody's driving. I anticipate there will be all sorts of debauchery and general craziness among my group.

So, I'm looking for advice/strategies for maintaining sobriety in this kind of situation. I really love my friends and everyone is looking forward to this, so I don't want to bail. But it's also important that I keep a level head and don't give in to temptation. To be clear, nobody's going to pressure me to do anything; all of the pressure will be internal. I just worry that I'll be in a situation where the little fucker in my head that likes getting blasted has too much ammunition. WWYD?

Again but here we go! I went to an in person Marijuana Anonymous meeting yesterday and threw away all my carts. I’m 41 and too old for this BS. I’ve been smoking on an off my whole life with the off part being 7 years of continuous sobriety from alcohol and weed. I relapsed on weed 3.5 years ago and it’s been a slow unraveling of my life since.
I just want my life back. Sobriety is such a blessing and I really hope I can hold on one day at a time. Really looking for support and encouragement and if anyone else can relate.

For the first time, found it super hard to go back to sleep after randomly waking up at 3AM, stayed wide awake until 5AM and then woke up 3-4 times in between until 7AM because as soon as my eyes were shut, vivid nightmares came knocking on my door. Oh well, shucks, gotta suck it up and continue the journey ladies & gentlemen.

Good luck to you out there on your journey whether it’s day 1 or 365.

The morning panic attacks have finally subsided, and my appetite has returned! The feelings of depression are fading quickly as well. I feel sharp, and clear, and actually funny not stoned funny. This page has helped me so much. Thank you all.

So yeah it's 12am and playing some apex rn. I wanted to do sports today nd now I just feel like vaporizing just like a tiny bit and then chilling and eating food and taking care of myself. Last time i quit I fell on day 8 and went back into the loop. Convince me not to and give some reasons why and how does it affect my withdrawals and so. Pretty light but daily use for years behind me.