r/PoursTea • u/Timbucktwo1230 🫖 Mod ☕️ • 7h ago

FeministTea👩🏻‍🎓👩🏿‍⚖️👠🥾 Perspective

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863 Upvotes

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13

u/PixelGoblin85 5h ago

I never really understood the hate for 'not all men' responses. I've seen it condemned in situations where someone would say something like "Men are rapists." ... and the response comes: "Not all men are rapists."

And then they get slammed.

But ... I mean, we all know know that not every guy in the world is a rapist. Not even most guys.

I also know that I have to protect myself from the ones that are or might be. But some people think that it's just some underlying programming and that all it would take is the right situation to bring out the 'rapist DNA' embedded in all men and I just ... don't get that at all.

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u/Silly_Confection_890 5h ago

Saw this one quote that was like 'When women say all men, they don't mean the Cornell 7, they mean the 50 men in the groupchat who saw her nudes posted and didn't say a thing.'

It's not that women think all men are rapists, just that almost every man has done something to perpetuate or ignore rape culture and violence against women.

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u/No_Piccolo_4312 5h ago

"Almost every man has done something to perpetuate or ignore rape culture" is an insane thing to say

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u/Silly_Confection_890 5h ago

Is it really? In a world full of 'that one uncle we don't let kids too close to,' 'oh that guy just says stuff like that, he's harmless,' and everyone who ever voted for 'grab em by the p****?'

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u/Bubbly-Iron-4653 5h ago

Take your meds

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u/Silly_Confection_890 5h ago

Good example

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u/bakinpants 4h ago

you're condemning a group based on hypothetical and subjective anecdotal evidence, and someone called you on it.

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u/Silly_Confection_890 4h ago edited 4h ago

If you genuinely think that was a call for empirical evidence, maybe you're the one who needs medication.

Edit: If you were actually interested in empirical studies, which is highly doubtful from your approach, here are some preliminary readings. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18259049/ (This next one is kind of interesting because it covers that training prevents this behavior which does indicate cultural aspects.) https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21642269/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/7373511/

I'm also not condemning anyone, and an actual documented court case event that happened is neither hypothetical nor subjective and anecdotal.

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u/Bob1358292637 4h ago

You're really selling their point. I think we should take rape more seriously than we do and implying someone is rapist-adjacent everytime they say something mean on the internet is not helping.

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u/Silly_Confection_890 4h ago

When did I do that? The only time I implied someone was rapist adjacent is when giving examples of bystanders to violent and dangerous behaviors such as pedophilia.

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u/Bob1358292637 4h ago

And then you said "good example" in response to their reply to that, lol. Are you being serious?

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u/Silly_Confection_890 4h ago edited 4h ago

I do think attempts to deride discourse about rape perpetuates a culture of ongoing silence about it. I do not think that makes someone the same as a rapist, it just makes them a product of the same culture.

Edit: Lol, just "stop." Bro is hopeless.

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u/Bob1358292637 4h ago

It is extremely obvious to everyone that is not what they were deriding. Stop.

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