r/PoursTea • u/Timbucktwo1230 š« Mod āļø • Sep 14 '26
FeministTeaš©š»āšš©šæāāļøš š„¾ Agree Or Disagree?
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Sep 14 '26
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u/greymisperception Sep 15 '26
Islamic women, so many of them are zealous and give away their own daughters to the ācultā despite not having much rights themselves itās crazy and a perfect example of OP
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Sep 15 '26
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u/greymisperception Sep 15 '26
Yeah, a lot of the very religious women, theyād choose the religion over their own daughters well-being
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u/FixTheUSA2020 Sep 15 '26
Women on the left have no need to police themselves as they all share 100% of thoughts and opinions.
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u/psilocin72 Sep 14 '26
Not just women. Name a group and you can apply that statement to them.
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u/BizSilver5013 Sep 14 '26
It's the negative consequence to humans being social creatures.
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u/Dependent_Amount6825 Sep 15 '26
As a man, I would guess the perpetuation of body shaming, beauty standards and sexual morals. Not to mention women advocating against planned parenthood when womenās healthcare is already way undervalued
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u/SteelWaterRunsHere Sep 20 '26
The Choice Feminism conversation has always been BS. Makeup is usually made with Child Labor yet somehow Choice Feminists think that wearing it, even if not to appeal to beauty standards is somehow personally liberating. On the other hand I donāt think Women āchoosingā to be sexually attracted to Men suddenly makes them not Feminist. Saying so is what leads to political Lesbians that delude themselves into thinking choosing to have Sex with solely Women is liberating. Or that āchoosingā to be a Sex Worker is harmful to Women. Even though Money is the only Material benefit anybody could possibly gain from having Sex.
The fact is neither of these things are conducive to Feminism. Yet only one is oxymoronic and harms Women like wearing Makeup. The other is simply personal choice that doesnāt directly harm themselves or anybody else. The whole hijacking of Feminism by Feminists of the Gloria Steinem ilk have taught Women that anything that feels personally Liberating for them makes them a Feminist. Still I think most people would see a Woman who wears makeup as Feminist assuming she does things conducive to Feminism more so than a Woman who DOESNāT wear makeup and doesnāt do any volunteer work, organizing, boots on the ground activism.
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u/Golurkcanfly Sep 14 '26
Duh, obviously. It's a system does its best to turn everyone it controls into its enforcers. Even those most oppressed by it can find themselves as enforcers of it.
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u/Gussie-Ascendent Allegedly approved user Sep 15 '26
Obviously? I think you'd have to genuinely have no idea what the sentence means to disagree with it, it's not even an opinion, it's just a fact
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u/space_toaster_99 Sep 15 '26
Humans will always police themselves for compliance with whatever the social contract is. The more sophisticated you get, the more intricate the rules that get enforced. Dentists and doctors have formalized this with powerful professional organizations
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u/Tight-Writing3151 Sep 15 '26
A woman nearly got away with the strangulation and murder of 3 kids under 6 because she was a woman, only 3 men were in the jury.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
This is utter nonsense. Ethan couch rans over and kills four people, leaving another one paralyzed only to get 10 years probation which he ended up serving 1 year. There are two young girls who killed their friend when they were like 12 and they are sitting on life sentence now.
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u/Tight-Writing3151 Sep 15 '26
My point was that women are absolutely going easier on other women, and honestly women need to police one another more.
And itās not nonsense, it's been all over social media and the news the past couple months.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Algorithm serves you what you want to consume. Thereās a lot of other stuff happening that is not in social media. And when did you ever see black woman on trial like this?
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
I mostly agree. They are thought to obey and not stand up against it from childhood.
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u/NegotiationSad6297 Sep 14 '26
Woman is nasty to another woman
"ThIs Is ThE PaTrIaRcHy'S FaUlT!"
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u/Separate_Aside_2929 Sep 14 '26
No kidding. Yet another accountability dodge that is beyond parody at this point.
I don't think you need a "patriarchy" for women to police each other. Groups will self regulate in the absence or presence of a hierarchy. I don't even think you can have a lasting group without a hierarchy as there are behaviors that are better and worse when it comes to survival. Doing a thing that is neutral or takes away from group survival or thriving? You get demoted in the hierarchy.
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u/EmperorGrinnar Sep 14 '26
I'm a cishet male, but the way I see women get treated differently from men doing the same thing is insane. Even when calm, they're told they're being emotionally biased.
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u/PalePlumm Sep 14 '26
I had two bosses at work - one male, one female. Same age. Both with 40 years of experience.
If the man raises his voice or slams a door, everybody just rolls their eyes. āThatās just Bob, ignore him. He gets like that.ā - itās a quirk. Just a tantrum now and then, no big deal.
Well forget slamming the door, because the woman already got fired for raising her voice ONCE.
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u/HiggsFieldgoal Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
āThe patriarchyā as the term exists today, is just bad plagiarism of Marxism replacing āthe bourgeoiseā with āthe patriarchyā and selling a narrative of men and women as natural enemies instead of natural allies.
We only got widespread access to birth control in the 60s. Before that, women had, on average, 8 kidsā¦ on average. Half the people you know would have more than 8 kids.
So, this took up most of womenās time, and that, not misogyny, explains the traditional gender roles.
But misandrist bigots like to believe men were, are, and always have been, evilā¦ and actually believe men do more harm to women than goodā¦ as they sit in houses men built, with running water, infrastructure, electricity, and benefiting from all these other obviously good things men have done, and use their free time to talk shit about men.
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u/Electronic-Link-5792 Sep 14 '26
Its more just abstract philosophical ideology from the 60s being bandied about by people as if its scientific truth by people because it suits them and allows them to portray men as universally bad and at fault and women as universally good.
This in turn lets them push for policies that benefit them (whether justified or not) and lets them shape what people in their circles (see how men posting the exact same stories on subs like AITAH get way more criticism)
Has almost nothing to with marxism in practice.
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u/coporate Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
Feminism really loves to steal concepts and ideas and abstract the validation of it. Patriarchy in anthropology is falsifiable, it speaks directly to mechanisms within the social structure that promotes the consolidation of wealth into the hands of men and boys, bypassing women entirely. Feminism took that concept, slapped the ambiguous on it (power) and applied it as an overarching social construct.
It took the legal idea of intersectionality, the concept that the law does not protect discrimination against people who exist at the intersection of different classes, and turned it into an oppression ladder.
Feminism died in the third wave, now it spawned the exact thing it claimed to fight. The manosphere is feminism, terfs are feminists, tradfems are feminists. And weāre supposed to sit here and pretend that those are positive causes for womenās rights? That feminism fights for men too? That thereās no such thing as a matriarchy? Give me a break.
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u/SteelWaterRunsHere Sep 20 '26
Are you saying that because Feminism turned the idea of intersectionality we now have Women who are effectively not Feminists acting or being seen as Feminists? If thatās true why would Feminists be TERFs? Or are you saying the movement has become hyper individualistic?
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u/PalePlumm Sep 14 '26
Bro men literally made laws preventing women from doing shit like working or owning property.
They literally put their misogyny on the record.
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u/chasteguy2018 Sep 14 '26
And men recognized this and put laws on the books changing this.
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u/Top-Cupcake4775 Sep 14 '26
no, men didn't "recognize this". it took angry women getting in their faces and pointing it out, over and over and over, for men to even admit that there might be a problem. those women were attacked, jailed, vilified, and spat upon for doing what they did. you don't get to rewrite history.
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u/Naaaaaaaaap Sep 14 '26
I think the animal meant that some men (and women) today recognize it and work to fix it. Of course other men and other women work against them and I couldn't tell you which one is the majority for either. To be clear, I don't think he thought of the women working to fix it as they always have, but focused on men doing it which comes across as dumb as dirt, but wcyd
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u/PalePlumm Sep 14 '26
After women fought for it. It was not out of the kindness of their hearts. Men TODAY would like to go back to those times.
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u/Select-Government-69 Sep 14 '26
Fought who? With what? Was the 19th amendment enacted after armed insurrection or some military defeat? Protests are not coercive. Nobody is or can be forced to do anything because of protests. They are persuasive and thatās all they can ever be. Those with voting rights (men) were persuaded to voluntarily enact the 19th amendment, after extensive advocacy by women.
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u/HiggsFieldgoal Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
āHetty Green Owned extensive real estate and entire city blocks in New York City, holding more property there than most banks.ā
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u/iKruppe Sep 14 '26
And 99% of women never suffered from the property laws because most people never owned property to begin with.
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u/Pangolin_FanWastaken Sep 14 '26
Men didn't make laws "preventing" women. Women had next to no legal responsibility in old times. Infact, the consequences of their actions almost always fell on their husband. All debt was their husbands, all damages were paid for by their husband, and they were never expected to participate in fire brigades or drafts.
You cannot look at 1950s working conditions and say it was oppression that men didn't make women work.
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
Women until fairly recently were not allowed to build houses, infrastructure, running water, electricity, etc.
Even now when women try to do these things they more often than not get sexually harassed at their jobs, aren't taken seriously, have their work questioned, and get shamed for doing such jobs in general.
With those FACTS in mind, it's a little disingenuous to call them "good things done by men", when women were never even given the opportunity to do them.
You also talk about childcare taking up much of women's time, as if that is not rooted in misogyny. As if women could choose not to without consequences.
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u/Choon93 Sep 15 '26
Theres gender roles because sexes specialize.Ā
Should women be be forced into the front lives with the draft?
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u/1JungleMonkey Sep 14 '26
What about World War 1 and 2, Korea, Vietnam woman played a key supportive roll not only by building planes and other machinery for the military but they also built or building and cars and other things in the private and public sector. Bore then women owned businesses land and countries. Men joke around with each other about sexual things all the time. For the most part we set our boundaries. If you can't hit back with jokes of your own tour going to be seen as weak and your going to get picked on.sure there are those that take it to far but thats few and far between in comparison. Fairly recently means a few decades. Lean a new arguing point.
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26
Telling me to get a new argument while pulling a "boys will be boys" is a new kind of hypocrisy I'll give you that.
And bringing up women during wartime as well, as if those are not exceptions to the rule, and those very same women were later discouraged from doing those things.
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u/1JungleMonkey Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
See my other post. No its not boys being boys, its people being people.
The only one being disingenuous here is not me. It looks like you want more division based on your baseless argument.
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u/CommanderYakub Sep 14 '26
āFactsā lol
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26
Well if you want to ignore reality because it doesn't conform to your opinions, be my guest. I assume you're from the "facts don't care about your feelings" faction though, so this is a little embarrassing for you.
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u/CommanderYakub Sep 14 '26
I have no idea what that faction is, I just doubt the validity of your claims on reality. In just seems like your opinion on how things worked so I too will offer my own opinion on how things worked. I think what you describe as ānot allowedā was a social contract that people agreed on that covered their cons and pushed their pros. Women did not build all the things you listed because both men and women would prefer those tasks be done by the gender who holds more physical ability. At the same time both men and women entrusted the all important task of taking care of the next generation to the gender capable of both child birth and nursing. Males and females are not the same they have strengths and weaknesses that influence what tasks they would prefer doing. In short they were allowed to do the things you list it would be extremely difficult to write in law that try and enforce absolutes.
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26
Yes it's legal. That's literally the first step. That's not the end of the struggle.
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u/iKruppe Sep 14 '26
It's because postmodernists, which flooded universities and are now getting into positions of power, believe that all of history is just power issues. Oppressors vs. Oppressed. For that to be true, the history of men and women cannot have any biologically grounded reasons, it must exist from the oppression of women by men. Shows the false base assumption disciplines like gender studies and other humanities have adopted.
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u/SquidTheRidiculous Sep 14 '26
Women are taught to compete with each other. That there can only be one woman good at something. It's like an enforced "Smurfette principle" but in real society. The absolute nastiest and most patriarchal women are the ones who tear other women down for their own benefit.
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u/chasteguy2018 Sep 14 '26
And men arenāt taught to compete with each other? Thats just human nature.
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u/SquidTheRidiculous Sep 14 '26
So you just glossed over the "Smurfette principle" part, huh?
There's a lot of implicit biases especially in male dominated fields. When it's a group of men and one or two women, the women are incentivized to compete with each other for respect from men. As though they can only handle being professional to one woman at a time. This is not inherent to any group but rather the result of ongoing social conditioning.
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u/True-Anim0sity Sep 20 '26
What your describing is inherent to every group... people are all constantly competing. You could literally reverse your example and get the same answer, you can even apply it to other groups like kids or race or etc.
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u/lilgator81 Sep 14 '26
I did not know there was a difference in being assertive, and being impolite, or being a b!tch until recently.
Break those bonds, ladies! Assert yourself and donāt apologize.
If they donāt give you a seat at the table, bring your own chair.
Letās go!!!!
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u/PalePlumm Sep 14 '26
As a woman, I rarely feel policed by women. It really only happens with some older women, and the intentions are different.
I feel way more policed by men. At least when women try to control me, theyāll talk to me like a human and seem to have good intentions. Theyāll say āyou shouldnāt wear that short skirt, a man might get the wrong idea.ā Itās misplaced protection.
When men try to control me, they talk over me. āWell I just donāt think a woman should be capable of deciding whether to abort a baby or not. She canāt make decisions for herself, so we have to make decisions for her.ā That completely and utterly dehumanizes me. And itās not just old men who do this. Itās young men too.
Iād take the old womanās comment any day over the manās.
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u/Current_Finding_4066 Sep 14 '26
Where is this patriarchy?Ā Even Ken in Barbie found out there is no alleged privilege and high life due to being a man.
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u/Lendosan Sep 14 '26
Should read:
āHumanity is failing because people are taught to police each other for free.ā
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u/joker6396 Sep 14 '26
Women are mean to each other because of women. No man taught them that, you do it all on your own
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u/Miserable_Pin2518 The Timeline Sucks Sep 14 '26
Thats not what something being a function of the patriarchy means though. Women uphold and enforce the patriarchy to an embarassing degree. This isnt an attempt to sidestep accountability you just cant read.
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u/weirdgroovynerd Sep 14 '26
Sigh.
Women are mean to each other so it must be a man's fault.
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u/Once-A-Republic Sep 14 '26
I mean, the beauty industrial complex does most of the work, but its economic soldiers are a big part of that. Get Ready With Me may as well be people putting on clown makeup.
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u/chasteguy2018 Sep 14 '26
No, this is just society. Men āpoliceā each other, women āpoliceā men and women āpoliceā each other.
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u/EccentricFeather Sep 14 '26
The patriarchy survives MOSTLY because abuse is typical behavior now. Every time you choose to be abusive, you probably choose to abuse the wrong person. If abuse had merit, the world wouldnāt suck for literally everyone.
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u/Fit-Rub3732 Sep 14 '26
How does this work? If women policing other women is "the patriarchy" would that not mean that men policing other men is "the matriarchy?"
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u/ArjGlad Sep 15 '26
I do not subscribe to patriarchy but it makes sense. Men policing men is also patriarchy. Patriarchy is simply the belief that societal beliefs, values and concepts of that nature are dominated by men to enforce and set up societies to benefit the male gender. So both men and womenās beliefs and values are dictated by men and only men.Ā
All that falls apart when wisdom arises and the realization that everything in existence follows the same natural laws: every force has an equal an opposite force/ yin and yang, endless names for the same phenomena leading to the conclusion - men and women are equal and can never not be equal, it is as impossible as night not becoming day
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u/Sad-Cantaloupe-5494 Sep 14 '26
Oh yes this is absolutely the case. This isn't to say that patriarchs aren't to blame, but women need to acknowledge their own part in their oppression too.
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u/Unfair-Alfalfa4916 Sep 14 '26
I have seen women who will literally scalp each other for a man so yes, it's intense and a lot of women fall for it actually not a small number like at all
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u/Thedankf0x Sep 14 '26
Kinda like how slaves were some of the biggest obstacle to freedom. Anyone breaking the norm brought a chance of punishment, so police anyone breaking the norm.
The crab bucket thing
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u/Appropriate_Fly_6711 Sep 14 '26
Partly sure, but to what degree is that critical for that survival is questionable
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u/Backdoor_Spreader Sep 14 '26
It survives because is the default for humanity, like how hyenas are matriarchal.
Biology.... something reddit doesn't believe in
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u/Advice-Question Sep 14 '26
The Patriarchy survives because itās profitable to say thereās a patriarchy that needs to be fought.
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u/_chillow Sep 14 '26
Women are taught to do that, or women just inherently do that? Men size each other up and compete in their own way, and it's not because we're taught. Some of this is just biology.Ā
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u/Paul_Savage_1 Sep 14 '26 edited Sep 14 '26
I disagree.
The argument that the Patriarchy survives because "women police women" is misguided and wrong.
Women naturally police women. They can't help themselves. It's fundamental to their own intrasexual competition.
And, if don't believe me, ask any lesbian....
Furthermore, a matriarchy would, by definition and practice, be nothing but women policing women. š
So, if the or a patriarchy takes advantage of this naturally manifest characteristic of the femine sex, don't blame the men. We just figured out that water flows down hill. And, it's better and, so much easier, to not fight it.
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u/Kymera_7 Sep 14 '26
The patriarchy doesn't survive at all. I'm just old enough to remember the last remnants of when it was still a real thing, but that was decades ago. However, with how the fallout is going, from the public response to the Clancy trial, it looks like I may well live long enough to see it resurrected, and in a big way.
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u/Monk-Prior Sep 15 '26
After the Lindsay Clancy bullshit, I donāt want to hear a single word about āthe patriarchyā ever again.
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u/timberwolf0122 Sep 15 '26
Iāve how you take one partial data point and declare some kind of victory.
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u/Monk-Prior Sep 15 '26
You say that like feminists havenāt been judging 100% of men based on partial data points.
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u/timberwolf0122 Sep 15 '26
As a group, on average, no.
However there is a (as every group has) a section of people who call themselves feminists who do go off half cocked on men.
Iām a red meat loving, guy who cuts his own fire wood, does most of his own vehicle maintenance and built his own hunting cabin. Iām also a feminist but for a while I would have rejected that label and said egalitarian.
The reason was living through the whole internet feminism movement and the counter movement that sadly lead to the incel to alt right pipeline.
I think it was best iconified by the YouTubers drinking out of cups labeled āmale tearsā. They did so much damage to the name feminism at the time I didnāt feel comfortable using it for years.
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u/EbonyMemories Sep 15 '26
And this is the part that annoys people -
In the current day, those women usually believe they're feminists.
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u/Researcher_Fearless Sep 15 '26
I still haven't heard a definition of the patriarchy that isn't either blatant conspiracy theory or just the existence of gender roles.
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u/Extension-Eye-4920 Sep 15 '26
Umm, women love policing or attempting to police eachother all on their own.
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u/SpaceNemo13 Sep 15 '26
The patriarchy is being kept on life support by women until they can replace it with a matriarchy and oppress men.
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u/BeRevolutionary1775 Sep 15 '26
āThe Patriarchyā survives because it built and maintains the world we live in.
No matter how angry and miserable feminists choose to be, that doesnāt change the fact that the civilized society depends upon masculinity to function.
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u/PraireGentleman Sep 15 '26
Police each other on irrelevant things*
Iād love if women policed each other on being bad partners, then there would be less social media posts about how proud they are to call themselves abusive
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u/SignificantLeader Sep 15 '26
Yep. And power at the heart comes from might. When the mighty follow laws and enforce the peopleās will, there is democracy.
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u/aggrophonia Sep 15 '26
Ah yes. Class war, Race War, Sex War.
Whatever keeps us to busy to see the strings.
Democrats bad. Gay people bad. Trans bad. Republicans bad. Boomers bad. Men bad. Women bad. Cis people bad. If you support bad people, your bad.
Now on the next episode of love island..... CASA AMOR!!!!
we are so cooked.
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u/Kitchen-Historian371 Sep 15 '26
Assuming that is the case, then do women police each other more now, or in the past?
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u/exodusuno Sep 15 '26
Ngl, at this point idc about this shit. Can we focus on stuff that can pave the way for more important future change that, like getting money out of politics, and uncapping the house and getting ranked choice voting and stuff. And plz for the love of God make it affordable to live, maybe after all that we can focus on this stuff, and itll be easier too make real changes too
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
The āpatriarchyā survives because people still pretend itās relevant. Our society is a lot more feminine than at any point in history (or should I say herstory?) but telling women they are still oppressed when they often actually have more power than the men in their lives is one hell of a magic trick
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Oh yeah? What percentage of CEOās are women? What percent of population are women? What percentage of Congress are women? How many women presidents you know? Please ā¦ maybe āoppressed ā is too harsh of a word but there are definitely all kinds of barriers to women in every aspect of human existence.
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
That argument is nonsense. It sounds smart on paper but doesnāt actually mean anything.
1) there are no structural barriers for women to enter those spaces of leadership and power. In fact, we have put programs in place to create an equality of outcomes (really just āequityā) and havenāt seen much progress
2) a much more intelligent question would be āwhat percentage of women become ceos, politicians, etc and what percentage of men attain those positions?ā Turns out this much more useful analysis reveals that most men donāt become CEOs and presidents and politicians either. Itās not a men vs women thing at all. Every comparative analysis of men and women done on society comes to the same conclusion:
- the average man and woman are nearly identical, with small variations at the mean (e.g. men are stronger on average and women are better caregivers) that are noticeable but generally negligible.
- where we really see the differences are at the extremes. For almost every metric studied, the left and right tails of the distribution are much further out for men (larger standard deviations). The most intelligent men have higher iqs than the most intelligent women ā¦ BUT the least intelligent men also have significantly lower iqs than the least intelligent women. Same with criminality, risk taking behaviors, physical attributes, and on and on.
- the conclusion is that the average man and woman may be essentially the same, but the exceptions are the ones that typically end up in positions of power - they are willing to work 80+ hour weeks for years on end, sacrificing every other aspect of their lives, including family and physical well being. A subset of men (the group at the tail of the distribution) seem more willing than their female equivalent to make those sacrifices
3) in reality, you and I are much closer as an average man and (presumably) woman than I am to a hyper-successful ceo, president, senator, etc
4) there is nothing in modern society that harms women given that more men are in charge
5) women have an equal voice to men and support this system too. The lazy argument is these women are voting against their self interest, but I would argue that is infinitely more sexist than anything coming from the other side - because that argument is stating that roughly half of women are too stupid to make their own informed decisions; thatās the same argument men used to make to deny women a vote or the right to property - turns out the modern feminist is far more anti-woman that Don Draper ever dreamed of š
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Men and women are the āsameā but are being typecasted. How many single dads are raising children, making doctors appointments, while their wives are surfing grindr? You think women arenāt capable of working 80 hours a week? They are. But they also know that children would starve and they would be looked at as bad mothers for doing that, but itās perfectly fine for guys to be like that. Itās actually favorable because guys are the ābread winners.ā Women are not looked at as bread winners even if they worked 100 hours a week. The barriers are there, social, economic, and the ones in peopleās heads. To say that the playing field is level is pretty asinine.
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
Typical woman response. Entirely miss the point and then act indignant about their made up positions.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Iām flattered. Itās so affirming. I was born male, still presenting male. But to give you a little background of where Iām coming from, I served over 15 years in two different militaries on two different continents and even spent some time in trenches in the war. At some point you just see the world the way it is. Youāre not there yet. Assumptions will get you nowhere.
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
Cool I guess? So you are comparing the status of women in the greatest time and place in history to be a woman (or any human for that matter) with places overseas where actual oppression exists? Are you daft?
You entirely missed my point and gave some nonsense point about how men and women have different societal expectations/norms as if it were evidence of a patriarchal society.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Men and women do have different societal expectations. I mean, seriously? Are you from this planet? Iām daft? lol
Yeah women have it better today than 100 years ago, but this is largely still a patriarchal and very misogynistic environment. Nothing silly about that.1
u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
Where is the patriarchy? Where is the misogyny?
Iām not arguing that society puts different expectations on men and women ā¦ but how is that evidence of a patriarchy or misogyny? Itās not
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
Thereās no point in arguing this any further. If you canāt see this for yourself I donāt see how anyone can really convince you.
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u/Wise-Kitchen-9749 Sep 15 '26
Not even a woman thing, its just a lame response from someone who has to argue. They are reinforcing negetive views that most people under 40 probably don't believe anymore. They are doing this without realizing that it is stigmatized for men to do that, that they are called bad fathers if they CHOOSE to put work over family. Almost nobody would say a mother is bad if she is working multiple jobs or long hours because its the only way to feed her kids. Same with a father doing the same. It feels like they have internalized some self hatred and have to project it here.
And I was definitely on your side until the "typical women" comment.
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26 edited Sep 15 '26
Oh I was just being an asshole. I donāt believe that about ātypical womenā at all. Just taking the piss because their response was useless.
Not excusing my assholery though. Cheers
Edit: and yeah totally on point about them foisting out of date stereotypes on men and women of today.
Anecdotally, I was the teacher/stay-at-home-dad while my wife was the breadwinner for several years until she was miserable being away from the kids so much and I was feeling unfulfilled in my ambitions. We sort of swapped roles but my wife still out earns me (using her doctorate for a cushy wfh gig) and Iām fulfilled being challenged in the tech field and using my engineering background. Most of my bosses have been women, and some were great and some werenāt and none of it had to do with them being women. Half the families in my neighborhood have high powered women running the household where dads do a lot of the kid stuff around the house when the wives are working late or are on business trips to refineries and clients and such.
Op really has no idea what they are talking about but makes assertions with such confidence that really donāt support the claim
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u/Wise-Kitchen-9749 Sep 15 '26
What about women without kids? Why do they not work 80 hours a week most of the time? The women who make it to CEO and other lucrative positions also make sacrifices.
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u/Wise-Kitchen-9749 Sep 15 '26
What percent of men are those things too? Yeah the top levels are cool to look at, but the 20 billionaires compared to the rest of the 175 million men seem kinda silly.
Let's say there are more women billionaires, how does that change anything for the rest of the 174 million women?
(Using USA numbers)
I focused on billionaires because they are the very top, but I have the same belief on ceos and government works.
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
Well stated. Concise and clean. My comment was way longer and had maybe 5% more substance š
Itās always interesting to me that the average man and woman have way more in common and have roughly the same opportunities (the majority of which are attributable to things other than sex) but some choose to fixate on the differences in the exceptions to the rule and pretend that maps onto the rest of society.
Itās either ignorance or dishonesty (or sometimes both). In the case of OP and most Redditors I assume itās 80+% ignorance and the rest dishonesty.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
This op might as well be ai just to get the shitposting going, who cares? Weāre here arguing, life is good, donāt you feel all warm and fuzzy now?
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u/IAmANobodyAMA Sep 15 '26
Life is good. I feel great. And pointing out common sense to terminally online Redditors is my penance for having such a good life.
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u/misha_jinx Sep 15 '26
What are you arguing here? Roughly 50% of the world are men. They hold 90+% of all positions of power. Meanwhile, same 50% of women hold less than 10% of power. So what percent of men and women are those things out of 50? Give it another try please.
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u/Creative_Ad1346 Sep 15 '26
Absolute nonsense. One looks at the ghouls defending Lindsay Clancy proves that. When men do what she did men do the opposite of supporting them
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u/NovelPackage4078 Sep 15 '26
The day women can physically overcome Men is the day that things might change until then men will always be the dominant gender.
Violence is the rule that all other things are derived from.
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u/frisco-frisky-dom Sep 15 '26
I dont think women are "taught" that anymore. Some are doing it out of their own free will.
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u/BriscoCounty-Sr Sep 15 '26
When are women going to start holding themselves accountable for what they actually do?
I could teach you that punching yourself in the face is a fun way to start the day; YOU have to actually do it.
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u/General-Stay1563 Sep 20 '26
Yall just had someone get off for triple homicide of her theee kids and you still cry the patriarchy... gimme a break
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u/True-Anim0sity Sep 20 '26
People cant really agree what the patriarchy actually is besides "things I like are not patriarchy, things I dislike are patriarchy"
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u/beating_offers Sep 20 '26
Men do this as well. Why would we want more dickish behavior from people?
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u/RoxiHeart123 Sep 14 '26
Women are different and voice their opinion. Im confused what the problem is. Are you saying women should stay quiet?
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26
The problem is that their opinions are wrong.
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u/RoxiHeart123 Sep 14 '26
Well that's not very feminist. All women should be allowed a voice.
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u/Acceptable_Handle_2 Sep 14 '26
You're really fishing hard for that gotcha aren't you?
It's not anti-feminist do disagree with a woman's opinion. Unlike you I don't want people with different opinions to my own to shut up and go away. I want them to see the error of their ways.
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u/RoxiHeart123 Sep 14 '26
Unlike you I don't want people with different opinions to my own to shut up and go away.Ā
Projection much? Funny how saying women's voice is valid even if you disagree to you saying that means shut upnand go away.
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u/BasicsofPain Sep 14 '26
The patriarchy survives because women choose for patriarchal mating characteristics. Period. The end.
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u/MetaCardboard Sep 14 '26
Luckily more and more women are breaking free.