r/MadeMeSmile • u/Alternative-Dot-34 • 16d ago
Wholesome Moments They were born to be grandparents!
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u/Square_Salt_1035 16d ago edited 14d ago
I get so jealous of normal loving families
Edit- didn’t expect my depressing little comment to blow up. Thank you for the awards. And thank you to every single one of you who only had kind words to share. And thank you to those who can relate. I’m happy for everyone who has found their loving family/created one and reminding me that if there’s a will, there’s a way, there’s always hope. So thank you Reddit family 🩷
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u/BotsKilledTheWeb 16d ago
Sometimes starting one yourself works out, sometimes it doesn't.... Hope you get yours one day.
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u/Joyst1q 16d ago
Sometimes it really just doesnt and you end up spending the last 10 years playing both parents. You can definitely be surrounded by people and lonely as hell. Just got to make what you got of the situation i guess.
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u/TheAserghui 16d ago
It's just like Shakespeare wrote: "Some parents were born to be, some parents were born not to be"
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16d ago
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u/ThickboyBrilliant 15d ago
In a way, you let the problem solve itself. Props where they're due. Respect.
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u/Black-Maestro 15d ago
You did great. It is always heartbreaking to realize that even your parents can make your life a living hell
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15d ago
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u/Exotica911 15d ago
Thank you for sharing, you're not alone. Ever since childhood, for many decades, I've always been the black sheep. One day, I had enough of my entire original family's dysfunction, their toxic codependency, all the backstabbing and triangulation, crossing me and my family's boundaries, and being their scapegoat. My husband and I sold our house and moved us and our kids a whole day's drive away. Can you believe that my narc parents had the audacity to do the same thing and moved right onto my street in my new town literally 20 steps away from me? I asked my parents again to respect our boundaries and to join me in family therapy once and for all which they refused. They went smearing about me to everyone. My siblings laughed and thought "Good, you can deal with mom and dad." Ha! Nope. The moment they all later tried to pull my husband and our kids into their web of manipulation, bribing my kids, and triangulating against me behind my back....that's when my own family and I decided to collectively cut everyone off for good. My siblings will have to fly out here themselves and deal with them now, more like keep enabling them. It's so deeply disappointing and sad that they don't see their own dysfunction. But I refuse to allow the cycle to continue with my kids. It ends with us.
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u/Nate_Dogg31 16d ago
Yeah, too late for me so I've come to accept it. Just going to enjoy my circle of friends while I can
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u/BotsKilledTheWeb 16d ago
I know that, we were lucky enough to start our own happy family. Like I said, sometimes that works out, sometimes it doesn't.
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u/JetLife93 16d ago
Yup. Never had the loving family growing up, got older thought I going the woman who I will grow older with had three kids with just for her to leave me for the younger coworker with has the rice burner for a car with no ac and no back seats. That works at Walgreens of all places. Now I'm with my kids alone but I'm always happy when I'm with them but when I'm alone cot' damn does it hurt. I don't see myself finding love again like that. I've had some incidents occur between my younger dapper days to now. I'm old and falling apart now I'm barely 34 but my job has taken the toll on my body and now having a change of career and it's been difficult and hell. But I still hold on for hope one day. One day I'll meet the woman who actually loves me for me, I know it.
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u/Isanyonelistening45 16d ago
Yeah that ship has sailed for me 47, no kids horrible parents and no regrets.
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u/CaktusJacklynn 16d ago
I was so glad when I turned 40. I felt like I crossed the finish line since I'm single with no children.
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u/Educational_Quote851 16d ago
Yeah that would require someone else on the same wavelength, and despite what your grandparents told you, that isn't easy.
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u/lets_Chat- 15d ago
Why do I feel like a homeless person gave me the most satisfying answer to a question on a lonely night @3am😭
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u/insignificantjump 16d ago
Sometimes starting one yourself is your ticket to healing. Best thing I ever did.
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u/measurementinvar 16d ago
My mom did not come from a normal loving family but she sure created one. I stand in awe of how she was able to create an absolutely idyllic childhood for me and my sibling. I didn’t understand the full depth and breadth of how much she did until I had my own kids. I’m sure you can do the same and give others the opportunities you never got. I wish you the best.
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u/OldDogsNoTricks 16d ago
My mom did the same. Absolutely remarkable. My childhood wasn’t perfect, but compared to what she came from (and what my dad came from too, for that matter) she absolutely crushed! My brother and I are both healthy, happy, functioning adults in beautiful marriages. I don’t understand it, but I’m so grateful.
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u/rmwg 16d ago
I hope and pray my kids say this about me someday. I’m the first woman of 3 generations to break the cycle. I’m so happy for you, many blessings to your mama. :)
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u/angelwarrior_ 16d ago
I’m so proud of you! I know it’s hard work! You’ve got this! I’m doing parts therapy right now and it’s been really helpful to me!
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u/rmwg 16d ago
Thank you 🥲 I don’t hear people say that they are proud of me often. It’s so hard and lonely, but my kids love me and I have a better relationship with them than I ever had with my parents. I’m proud of you, especially for going to therapy! We all could use it.
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u/barefoot_plyos 16d ago
I want to cry. This is beautiful. I’m trying so hard to do this for my kids.
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u/minimalistjunkiee 14d ago
just wanted to share my mom did the same! my mom doesnt even have a relationship with her parents. i love both my parents v much and couldn’t be more grateful for either of them
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u/angelwarrior_ 16d ago
I LOVE that! That is how generational trauma is healed! I bet it was healing for her inner child too to give y’all experiences she never had!
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u/throwaway28492432 16d ago
As a new parent, just curious what stood out to you the most in your idyllic childhood? I want to create the same for my kids 🥰
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u/measurementinvar 16d ago
She and my dad were/are united in their goals for their family. So though she definitely had more to overcome, it was her and my dad together that made it work.
She listened more than she spoke. She took a genuine interest in our lives.
They read to us even when we could read on our own. They wanted us to have roots and wings. They were proud and supportive of us. They admit when they’re wrong. Our home was a respite from the rest of the world. We could be ourselves there. Our friends were welcome there too.
Parenting is hard. Parenting without an example of how to do it well must surely be so much harder. I honestly don’t know exactly how she did it other than to look at her own life and decide that’s not what she wanted.
My parents are now the beloved grandparents of several young adults and I’m hopeful that I’ve been able to pass the best of what they gave me to my kids.
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u/ComparitiveRhetoric 16d ago
Me too internet pal, me too.
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u/ChoppaChief 16d ago
Internet hug to you both. Plenty of us are nodding along in this thread, so you're in good company
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u/FakePoloManchurian 16d ago
Be the change you want to see. I didn't get that kind of love, but I will spend the rest of my life ensuring that my daughters do.
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u/Smiling_Tree 16d ago
Yeah... Not everybody has/can have children. \ I'm just that single aunt, always visiting alone. Luckily my niece and nephew think I'm funny and say I'm their favourite aunt! (Out of two... Lol. But still).
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u/Spotttty 16d ago
I have no idea how old they are but just be that Aunt that they can confide in.
I have pretty great kids but I know there is stuff they won’t talk to me and my wife about and they don’t have an adult to talk to outside of us.
Be that ear for them! And never tell their parents what they say.7
u/WackyRacketeer 16d ago
My favorite thing in the world is hearing how my Nephew is disappinted when any of his other Uncles visit because its not me. He is my wife's blood, but I love him a lot. I feel a little selfish feeling satisfaction that im the favorite, but I dont care, it feels great.
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u/WhyAmIThisBored 16d ago
i'm in a similar boat but i'm adamant against having children. i just make a point of being awfully nice and attentive to everyone i talk to. it works wonders on the elderly, they're so fun to speak to!
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u/11lumpsofsugar 16d ago
You don't necessarily have to have kids to benefit from this. Reparenting your inner child is enormously beneficial for healing from shitty parenting.
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u/Woopsied00dle 16d ago
I’ve found a happiness tinged with a soft sadness when seeing stuff like this. As a mom now I’ve found tremendous healing in giving my children a loving life all kids deserve.
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u/PeakNo6892 16d ago
I have to really fight with myself not to get that bitter jealousy when I see loving parents.
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u/CelerMortis 16d ago
find one. Marry into one.
There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting normal grandparent situations, you can choose a partner on this vector with zero guilt.
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u/thegoatmenace 16d ago
I have never seen my parents exchange a joke or be playful with each other in any way. It’s something you don’t really notice as a kid because you have no frame of reference, but as an adult it’s really stark. Of course they are divorced now, but it’s too late for me to experience this kind of family.
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u/NadjaCravensworth 15d ago
Same. Except they never divorced and now live in my home and bitch about each other to me endlessly. I don't know how to make them stop.
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u/Devilutionbeast666 16d ago
I just sent this comment to my wife 🤣 my family is this unbounded ball of love and jokes and joy and my extended family is HUGE. She always says it's weird that everybody likes each other so much 🤣 but really when it comes down to it she will admit there's a level of jealousy that everybody enjoys being together. She was raised with love but much more "British formal" and "everybody know your place"
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u/Clear-Ad6973 16d ago
Oof. I feel this. And not that my parents and in laws aren’t loving. It’s just that 3 of the 4 died long before we married and had kids.
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u/azrckcrwler 16d ago
Same. I was pouring my coffee while watching it and I over flowed my cup because it hits so hard.
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u/Addamsgirl71 16d ago
I have absolutely no idea how "unconditional" mother's love feels?! I know what it looks like ,which is so painful. I've seen those giving and those receiving. But that is something I never received. Now, as a mom myself I give it as freely and as openly as I can to my son. It heals but also scoops out my heart. I am, somewhat, jealous of my own child. But I have open and honest conversations with my son about it so he never doubts that I just openly love him with all I am.
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u/srddave 16d ago
I love how expressive people who sign are. To see the physical joy in their signing and their faces really was so moving. It made me smile and cry.
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u/phl_fc 16d ago
The awesome part is that babies can learn sign language well before they can learn to talk (6+ months earlier), so the grandparents will be the first ones communicating with the kid.
Baby sign language is incredibly useful, it's so frustrating to both the kid and adults when a baby wants something but can't communicate what it is.
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u/Calypsosin 16d ago
both of my sisters taught their babies sign and it was so incredibly obvious how much easier it was to communicate on both sides. It seems like a no-brainer to me.
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u/fionaapplejuice 16d ago
Just so you know, calling it baby sign is frowned upon in the Deaf and signing communities (in the US). It's not "baby sign"; it's literally sign language which is a full language with its own grammar and everything. Calling it baby sign as akin to baby talk frames sign language as just a learning tool for hearing babies to use before they can speak, at which point the "baby sign" is dropped bc many ppl using it for their hearing babies don't appreciate it for the language that it is. Actual baby sign would be the ways that babies or young children sign with limited dexterity, in the same way that speaking kids might say yellow instead of hello.
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u/snail_juice_plz 16d ago
Thank you for this! I have taught all three of my kids to sign and always referred to it as “baby sign”, thinking that some of the signs used weren’t “true” ASL so it was to differentiate it that way.
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u/fionaapplejuice 16d ago
> thinking that some of the signs used weren’t “true” ASL so it was to differentiate it that way.
Right, and this is exactly why the Deaf ppl I've heard about it from don't like the term. The sign for milk is the sign for milk, just like the English word for milk is the same whether it's a baby or adult saying it. The baby just doesn't have the motor skills to say it quite right yet. If you're interested, HandSpeak is an online ASL dictionary so you can brush up on those signs and some of the entries also have little kids signing so you can see real "baby sign"
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u/HistoricalFrosting18 16d ago
I’m from the UK, so when people say “baby sign” they don’t mean ASL, but I’m pretty sure they don’t mean BSL either - if I hear “baby sign” I assume they mean Makaton symbols.
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u/phl_fc 16d ago
Is the frowned upon part the word or the usage? Because I do think it's true that most parents who teach their babies to sign have no intention of teaching full ASL. They really are just using it as a tool to bridge the gap to speaking and then intend to drop it. Like, if a baby invents their own sign for something parents aren't going to bother correcting them. That made up sign is good enough for short term use.
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u/bullzeye1983 16d ago
We have kept up with sign and at 2.5 my son is nearly bilingual. We keep learning so we can both become fluent. I love it for two reasons. First if he forgets a spoken word I sign it to him so I don't feed him the answer. Works every time. And second when we go somewhere super loud, being able to sign instead of yell to him is insanely helpful!
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u/on_weds_we_wear_pink 16d ago
17 years later I still instinctively sign "all done" even in normal conversation. It's also great when wife and I are at a function and from a distance one can signal the other if they want to pull an irish goodbye.
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u/museumlad 16d ago
There's an important reason for this! In ASL (and other signed languages), facial expression and body language are literally part of the grammar. For example, when asking a question, your eyebrows raise for a "yes/no" question, and furrow for a "wh-" question (who/what/when/where/why/how). Forgetting the raised eyebrows while asking a "yes/no" question literally makes it into a statement—"do you have siblings?" becomes "you have siblings." Another example: to sign that something hurts, you sign "HURTS" at the location where it hurts (if on your upper body, at least)—stomachache, sign "HURTS" in front of your stomach. Headache, sign in front of your forehead. If your arm, sign "HURTS" then point to the part of your arm that hurts (because it's a two handed sign).
It's for this reason exactly that there aren't any widespread technologies that can "read" sign and translate it to English, because ASL gloves or AI tools or whatever can't read facial expressions or body language like the human eye can, or the rate of error would be too high to be even remotely usable. This is part of why human interpreters haven't (and currently can't) be replaced by technology.
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u/AnotherOrc 16d ago
I was just about to comment this. There used to be group of deaf people in the rave scene that I was involved in back in the day and they were fucking hilarious. Those big overt expressions show a different level of personality.
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u/soopadrive 16d ago
These are the kinds of grandparents all kids (and parents) deserve.
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u/DarkMemesLiveHere 16d ago edited 16d ago
I cannot fathom who I'd be if I'd had this. Wish I could meet that person...
I'm so glad that little one gets the chance to.
Edit: formatting.
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u/woolfchick75 16d ago
My parents were crazy about their grandchildren. My nephew and my father were best buddies. It was great to see.
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u/jollydoody 16d ago
You can have it. Become the parents that maybe, eventually become the grandparents. Imagine what you will be if you create this in your life (don’t fret about what you didn’t have - make the love you wish you had).
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u/perplexedscientist 16d ago
I'm trying to do that for my kids, but I struggle a lot with putting my own dysfunctional upbringing aside and being normal.
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u/TheGreatCthulhu 15d ago
My wife & I got to see out first grandson (we also have a grandaughter) last week. He is 15 months old, we had a long trip to another country to see him, it was a long wait, we wanted to see him earlier.
Being a grandparent is extraordinary. It's instant love. You pick up the baby, and you are done. It makes you think about the things you have done right in your in your life, the things you have done wrong or the mistakes you have made being a parent (there are probably parents who don't make mistakes, I wasn't one), and how life presents you with opportunities to improve.
The pride in seeing my daughter and her son (or my son & his daughter) matches the love.
My kids aren't biologically mine, I didn't even get to adopt them, I just got to raise them, so I am always questioning myself & my importance to them, and if I "count".
Being seen as their grandparent is, with marrying my wife, the greatest thing to happen me in my life.
I once told my wife that there is no emotional equivalent to the conservation of energy (yes, I am a geek), that it seems the amount love available to us has no limit.
Being a grandparent, my love for my daughter increases, I add in the growing love for my son-in-law, their love for their son adds to my own,.I understand my daughter feels for her son like I feel for her, my wife and I think our grandchildren are the best children ever born. Each feeling adds to the others, a soup of love in which each flavour adds and cannot be extracted.
I'm still quite caught up in the emotion of it all.
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u/techman710 16d ago
She put the hip check on grandad so she gets first contact. This is awesome.
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u/QwackSparrow 16d ago
I was concerned for him lol
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u/supertimor42-50 16d ago
Rule of the grandparents jungle, sometimes there's casualties
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u/OGBeege 16d ago
Elbows up…
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u/supertimor42-50 16d ago
Yes, this have a double meaning in Canada ;)
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u/weirdgroovynerd 16d ago
Go on...
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u/supertimor42-50 16d ago
Elbows up is part of our national sport (hockey) and we translate it to multiple facets of life.
We also use this phrase as a national "resistance" against the US.
Or when grandparents fight to the hip for their grandkids
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u/ArcadiaDragon 16d ago
So was the baby "hey wait a minute, there goes my supply of 50's notes for b-day and Christmas"
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u/memesearches 16d ago
Poor grandpa even slowed down, waited for her and lend his hand only to be showed to the side. Grandma was not going easy on him lol
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u/stewpedassle 16d ago
I do love the camera action on it. You can almost hear the "Is he okay?...nevermind, he's just being Dad." in her brain with first starting to follow and then immediately snapping back to Grandma when it was clear he wasn't stumbling.
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u/weirdgroovynerd 16d ago
"Knocked outta frame!"
*John Madden after a Monday Night Football replay.
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u/kenneth_dart 16d ago
You don't even have to speak or hear a single word to read all that body language from the infant to the parents to the grandparents. 💕
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u/Accomplished-Survey2 16d ago
Was worried he was going to tumble off into the ravine on side there.
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u/ashbash-25 16d ago
I am not deaf. I taught all 3 of my babies to sign from birth. Simple signs like: mom, dad, nap, food, drink, all done, stop, help, milk and so on. It was amazing to give them a means to communicate with me that wasn’t just crying. They were pretty happy kids and early talkers/readers! 10/10 would recommend.
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u/mewithadd 13d ago
Yes! I did this too. I read it helps them comm better before they are able to form words. They knew milk, hungry, more, and thank you. And probably a few more that I have forgotten now. It was so cute to feed them and have them sign "more" between bites rather than squeeling or crying if I wasn't moving fast enough. I don't know if it was related (although it makes sense... Language is language), mine were also early talkers and readers.
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u/ahomeneedslife 16d ago
Babies in homes that use sign language babbel in sign.
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u/CelerMortis 16d ago
babies can also learn to sign usually way before verbal skills develop. Most parents just stop at "more" "all-done" "milk" some basics like that
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u/Marsdreamer 16d ago
My daycare taught our son to sign so he could communicate a bit before he could talk. Suuuuuper helpful having him know even a few words like "more," "all done," "milk," "share," etc.
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u/Want2BnOre 16d ago
That Joy is contagious. I have such a big smile watching it.
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u/Lola-Ugfuglio-Skumpy 16d ago
Hard to frown when you see love that true! Thanks for sharing, OP, I needed this 🩷
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u/tuckitytucktuck 16d ago
How far did she push him? He was gone for a while 😂😂
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u/hstormsteph 16d ago
I saw a man who knew he has maybe 4 crispy cuts left in his knees and wasn’t about to waste em boxing out his wife
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u/rossg876 16d ago
Can kids pick up sign language as quick as a spoken language at this point?
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u/AlternativeShadows 16d ago
faster! I grew up with deaf parents and I signed my first word long before I spoke my first word (lived with hearing grandparents, so I had access to both languages at the same time)
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u/rossg876 16d ago
Thats fascinating. I would think that is really great for brain development!
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u/AlternativeShadows 16d ago
sometimes people think asl means you're essentially removed from English, but spelling is a huge part of it and being understood, especially as a kid who's still learning signs. my siblings and I were all way past the average reading level in English when we were in school
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u/LivingGhost38 15d ago
Same bc my sister was deaf.. I assumed I excelled at reading and spelling bc of that and bc I always had to watch tv with the captions on.
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u/DepartureOk3241 16d ago
I once read that sign was easier for babies to pick up because they can move thier hands before they can make articulate sounds. Like a baby could sign "milk" before they could ever say it
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u/This-is-the-last-one 16d ago
I'm not deaf, but taught my kids basic sign language before they could speak. Things like eat, drink, the basics. They caught on very quickly.
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u/DrowAboveground 16d ago
When my mom’s friend had a baby she could tell us when she had to poop and when she was hungry within just a couple months, way before she started talking.
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u/MyDarlingClementine 13d ago
To this day, my husband and I use the ASL for “all done” instead of saying it because it just became so normalized to use it with our infant before he could speak.
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u/crochetawayhpff 13d ago
Baby sign language is a thing! They are very good at picking it up before they can talk
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u/CreativeBandicoot778 16d ago
These are the lovely grandparents who I've seen signing to their granddaughter in other videos and she babbles back to them using sign language. It's very sweet and a fascinating look at how babies pick up language. You can tell she is a very much adored little lady and she has amazing grandparents.
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u/thegirlwithagift 16d ago
My baby is 7 month, he was born deaf. The deaf community are so wonderful and welcoming. Love this!
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u/firequak 16d ago
When you are with a baby or a toddler in your home "silence is not peace, it is a warning sign".
The granparents: 🫶🫴🙌👍🤟🫰
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u/everybody_get_ready 16d ago
Man... wish all parents had that energy. You really can't tell who wanted to be parents and who just did it cause....
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u/No_Maintenance_9608 16d ago
Grandma almost bodychecked Grandpa! Family get together almost became a hockey game. 🤣
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u/residentalien2 15d ago
Even more than born to be grandparents, they are born to be partners. My man slowed down, shortened his steps, almost paused to let his wife get ahead and grab the grandbaby.
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u/Glass_Big_9870 15d ago
Love this clip!!! Pure joy.
I spent 60+ years not having the mother I wanted and needed…and then we both started to reset our relationship expectations and understanding. She died last year. I was out of the room when she passed after being there for weeks. As soon as I could get there I put my hand on her body and thanked her for our last years together. So much love for each others. I’m so grateful. Realize that isn’t the way it could be for many folks. We were both so grateful we had it…
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u/vivienleigh12 16d ago
You can tell new mom/their daughter has been signing with the baby. Baby clearly understands some of what is being signed (as much as a baby can understand any language) ❤️
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u/GruesomeBalls 16d ago
Grandma yeeting Grandpa into the hedges and having him jump back smiling melted my heart.
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u/bbreddit0011 15d ago
Grandpa almost got put in the wall by grandma. Glad he was able to run that one out!
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u/CaktusJacklynn 16d ago
It's the grandparents nearly full on sprinting to get to their grandchild that hot me🤣🤣. And then the hip check from grandma to grandpa.
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u/iliumada 16d ago
I have been missing my mom so much today. This made me cry like a baby! I hope they have a long and happy life with their grand baby 💜💜💜
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u/Strict_Boat3275 16d ago
Wish I could believe this was a natural reaction and not one they made because they knew it would become content.
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u/no_desk_writer 16d ago
What is that music in the background?
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u/aware_nightmare_85 16d ago
Sounds like an acoustic version of Everybody Wants to Rule the World by Tears for Fears
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u/aaronreddit 16d ago
Sounds like an acoustic guitar cover of Tears for Fears "Everyone Wants to Rule The World" not sure who it's by though haha :)
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u/Dy3_1awn 16d ago
I think it might be an acoustic version of everybody want to rule the world by tears for fears
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u/Appropriate-War2775 10d ago
i fear i’ll never be able to create a loving family of my own. I don’t even know what being
loved properly looks like.
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u/supersupremo69 16d ago
my parents would react the same way! They super love kids! Unfortuantely my dad passed few months ago and he never got to experience having a grandkid, he was always asking us to give him one.
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u/waspocracy 16d ago
I remember when my dad invited us to this family gathering (his wife's family) and we arrived with our newborn. My dad took him and that was the last time I saw the baby for like three hours. I caught glimpses of our baby being passed around. My wife and I just sat back and relaxed for the first time in what felt like years.
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u/Background_Edge_9427 15d ago
It's so beautiful how happy they are! Even if Grandma almost pushed Grandpa down face first! 😂😂😂
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u/Zephyr2115 16d ago
Grandpa & grandma are so sweet!! I just love how she bumped him out so playfully 🥰 They are so cute! Baby got some awesome grandparents 😍
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u/DarkDaysBrightNlghts 16d ago
That Everybody Wants To Rule The World acoustic Instrumental sounds great, fits well with the video!
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u/DurantIsStillTheKing 16d ago
Too bad we can't post gifs here, I'm prepared to find the "smiling while watching this on the phone".
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u/EyeShot300 16d ago
That baby will go to school and be the coolest kid there, because he or she has a secret language to communicate with Grandma and Grandpa. ❤️
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u/Livid_Course_8768 16d ago
i always cry seeing happiness like this, this time i cried into my mozzarella sticks 😭🥹😭🥹😭
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u/yaaaaaarrrrrgggg 16d ago
I love how she pushed him so hard he almost fell. ;) This also was a tearjerker.
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u/Different_Serve1340 15d ago
What day did your mom push dad into? It seemed like it took a minute before he reappeared
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u/MagsandBodyBags 14d ago
As grandparent myself I can watch this video every day. The happiness, love and joy brought by grandkids is like nothing else you can experience.
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u/ppowell67 14d ago
That’s one loved little one. I know you had an amazing childhood being loved by those two. I wish you and your family all the happiness and health!
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u/animeandbeauty 11d ago
You can just tell they all love each other (even the baby is ecstatic) and I'm probably gonna cry
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