r/BoyDinnerDiaries • u/clockiebox Hungry man • 6h ago
No Advice - Everyones Welcome Finally got a real baddie i’m in love with from work to a second date yesterday. Don’t have anyone to share i’m proud.
Long story short i’ve been super into this girl from work. She’s super smart, into the same shit I am, beautiful, but due to her having cancer when teenager and having real bad experience with guys, she was super defensive. I took my time, didnt rush her, even though it was hell at some points. We had a rough first date where i got anxious and basically rushed to intimacy too soon, even though she asked me before not to (i mean like kissing and holding her close, nothing crazy). We took a week off msing and recovered. Went to a second date yesterday, it looks real good, she’s asking to come home to me next time. Feeling so fucking proud right now, I was thinking I’m done for (late 30s), but turns out I can totally bag a baddie. Dinner is grilled chickin a la sushi bowl. I know nothing’s sure but I already feel like a winner, even if it ends.
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u/i-eat-dolphins Shower Beer Scholar 6h ago
People are gonna come in here telling you not to date your coworkers but that's BS it can work and has worked
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u/Doodiecarrier Shower beer Scholar 6h ago
I mean fuck, where else do you meet people at 30+?
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u/No-Life-6054 Leftover Lore Master 6h ago
Word.
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u/BloatedBanana9 Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
Ok so I’ve typed “looking for a gf” into my document. Now what do I do? Does it need a cool font?
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u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Agony Auntie 4h ago
Excel would give you a formula but don’t trust Co-pilot or you’ll end up with your own diary entry here😅
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u/tutocookie Macro Mourner 3h ago
Comic sans, or if you're over 30, probably serious sans would do better
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u/AdamxCraith Big Dill Energy 5h ago
You go outside brother. I'm 32. Met my partner at a wrestling show. Made a lot of friends at my local board game shop. Made quiet a few acquaintances going karaoke. It's not hard.
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u/No-Life-6054 Leftover Lore Master 6h ago
Agreed. I didn’t mention in my original comment. We met from the same work and not your situation. We don’t work there anymore but I still get to be with her. So yea… it can be good.
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u/GoddessUltimecia Hungry man 6h ago
At the risk of pissing off a lot of people:
Most redditors are simultaneously puritanical and lonely. Their advice is very often self-repellant.
Outside of creepy shit like dating people half your age and whatnot, don't listen to redditors. If you fuck up, you fuck up but just take it to the chin and move along. Aim to lift your partner up and hope they do the same for you.
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u/Cocoayashi Girl Lurker 3h ago
Okay but hear me out, guys in their 40s are at the peak of how attractive they can be. You telling me I should leave them alone?? Are they so awful for not rejecting my relentless onslaught of flirting?? (CONSENSUAL flirting with SINGLE men)
This is mostly referring to my poor boyfriend who doesn’t want my coworkers to know we’re dating because he thinks they’ll think he is a creep when in reality our 2 year relationship is completely my fault 🙃
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u/GoddessUltimecia Hungry man 3h ago
By all means, if it works out for ya'll and there's no terrible dynamic have at it. Just because most age gap relationships have predatory dynamics doesn't mean all of them do.
I can't judge too much. My first time was with a middle aged woman and I don't think I came out worse for the experience.
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u/srlemp Protein Prophet 6h ago
I’ve worked with my wife 3 separate times/companies. Met her at the first job we had together too. Now we both work from home and will pop in to see each other still. We like each other’s company and it’s never really been a problem.
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u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Agony Auntie 5h ago
I met my husband at our first shared workplace. I started working from home and then when I worked in an office again it was at his current workplace. I then got another job but we are both hybrid so share a home office.
We work well together, value each other’s opinion and areas of expertise and simply enjoy each other’s company. We’ve been married over 18 year now 🥰🥰 I know a few couples that work well together and one that job shares!
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u/Ronin607 BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
It was one of the most common places for people to meet their partners before dating apps came along and for good reasons. A bunch of people of a similar age, economic and educational levels, being able to get a first impression of someone, etc. Also the whole “it could be a problem if you break up” thing is overblown. People have an incentive in a workplace to keep things professional and act like adults. That same incentive doesn’t exist in most other contexts where people meet partners. You’re way more likely to end up in some messy drama with a bad breakup between two people in a friend group or hobby group or something and yet those are often the spaces people recommend to find dates in lieu of the workplace.
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u/PienerCleaner Shower beer Scholar 5h ago
I see more women sharing stories of it working out with coworkers than men do
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u/madogvelkor Leftover Lore Master 5h ago
I think women just like to talk about relationships more than men in general.
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u/Future_One4794 Girl lurker 5h ago
Where else are you supposed to meet people after college. Its just gym and work lol
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u/Clear_Painting9711 Air Fryer Aristocrat 5h ago
It’s so funny how riled up some folks get on here when someone mentions dating a coworker
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u/Active_Confection655 Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
Lol, because it goes 3 ways but rarely the fourth option of chill workspace and good relationship.
The other 3:
The funniest, Yall break up, can't stand eachother but you're stuck working together.
The workplace becomes awkward because of the affection
The last but not least the work environment gets toxic and everyone is uncomfortable.
It always starts fine, but there is a reason they cannot keep boundaries with coworkers.
My job is simply way more important than dealing with a disaster if things go south. You see these people at work where we all try to act sane. Wait until your guard gets let down. 😅😅
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u/madogvelkor Leftover Lore Master 5h ago
Yep, I've mostly dated coworkers and it worked well. My wife was a coworker. And we work at the same large employer now, but in different buildings and departments.
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u/ExtensionEbb7 Shower Beer Scholar 4h ago
Idk, she sounds like she could be pretty young from his description. Let’s say she is early 20’s and he ends up scaring her away with his assertiveness, he could be seen very poorly at work after that.
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u/A_Cinnamon_Babka Leftover Lore Master 4h ago
Yeah historically
10-20% of marriages originated at work.1
u/Sure_Manner_7248 Fridge Light Philosopher 3h ago
Lots of people meet their future spouses at work. Just need to be smart about it.
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u/SeasonalChatter Air Fryer Aristocrat 6h ago
Don't be too eager now my guy. Keep it cool. She is a woman, not a prize don't rush it just because she's coming home. Have a nice, cozy night. Connect with her, get a sense for what your life might be together if she moves in, etc. You seem kinda focused on how bad she is.
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u/cienfuegos2607 Hungry man 6h ago
Hear this guy! Enjoy the process, get to know each other. Luckily there will be a lot of things in common. But surely you guys have to deal with it things not so close!
Enjoy your time with her. Go have some fun :)
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u/No-Life-6054 Leftover Lore Master 6h ago
From someone who also bagged a baddie and in my 30s. Very nice, dude. High five, raise a drink, and enjoy the time with your baddie.
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u/ctokes728 Protein prophet 6h ago
Yee met one 3 months ago and we’ve been dating for 2 months now. Heading over to her place after work today and can’t wait. We’re both 34 too. Life’s been great lately.
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u/No-Life-6054 Leftover Lore Master 6h ago
Nice. I asked my now spouse if she wanted to help me dog sit and watch Love, Death, and Robots back before pandemic days.
It’s pretty great when things go well.
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u/Spectralshot23 BoyDinnerEnjoyer 5h ago
You haven't bagged anything, dude. You seriously need to slow your roll or you'll chase her away
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u/SeasonalChatter Air Fryer Aristocrat 5h ago
Yeah reading this my first impression was that OP was so eager that he's way jumping the gun. I'm worried about a scenario where he tries too desperately to make something happen just because shes coming home (and I get, that usually means intimacy but it's really important read the room and realize that's not the scenario and be cool with it), or that he might get clingy because you can kinda feel the intense excitement of the baddie he's 'bagged' on the third date.
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u/Active_Confection655 Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
This will get toxic and end up dampening the work environment. 😅
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u/wh0re4nickelback Girl Lurker 4h ago
I felt skeeved out just reading this.
OP, as a woman, I implore you to pump the brakes. I'm 41 and this behavior is a massive turn off, especially if she already asked you to take it slow on the first date and you didn't. This behavior is how you get your number blocked and an HR complaint.
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u/PienerCleaner Shower beer Scholar 5h ago
I'm wondering why you rushed intimacy when she told you not to
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u/Miltankbeest BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
Congrats but did not think OP was in his 30s from how he wrote/detailed the situation
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u/AmazingAd2765 Fridge Light Philosopher 6h ago
And because of the comedy sketch, I tend to equate baddie with Nazis
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u/Legitimate-Row-8713 BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
Did you think he was older?
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u/Miltankbeest BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
i thought he was like 18 lol. "kissing and holding her close"
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u/Legitimate-Row-8713 BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
Meh, a lot of 30+ yr old guys who haven't had much experience with girls talk similar but rarely share their stories because of backlash online (aka bro you're like 30 and still haven't had a gf lol what a world) and its just discourages one to share our wins and losses with other guys.
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u/Miltankbeest BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
its not the story, its communication of it. Just sounded very immature. but yea, i like to peek on boydinners mainly for the ego boost, some of the stories here are something else and I just can't relate
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 6h ago
Cringe for a late 30's dude to be referring to women as "baddies".
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u/agent_flounder BoyDinnerEnjoyer 5h ago
And talk about being proud that he can bag one. Wtf. :(
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u/Special-Homework-894 Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
White knights out in force today
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u/VaultAir Shower Beer Scholar 3h ago
generic username calling out “white knights” who think it’s gross that late 30s OP is “bagging baddies” and rushing intimacy
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u/youngjetson Boy Dinner Enjoyer 5h ago
If you can bag a baddie you should be proud. It’s a cannon male experience.
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
Maybe when you're 17, not late 30's. Sounds like the OP never had any since it had him.
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u/BucketofSlush BoyDinnerEnjoyer 4h ago
I'm 29 and pulled the baddiest 30 year old. She loves me calling her a baddie. She's such a baddie. I love her.
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u/youngjetson Boy Dinner Enjoyer 5h ago
Hardly. When they’re fine as fuck they are baddies! At any age!
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
When olds start using young people slang it automatically is no longer cool. This is a universal truism.
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u/Larnek Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
Well, baddies was slang for people in their 30s and 40s from when they were young.
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
No, it wasn't.
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u/Larnek Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
OK, I guess I didn't live thru it, my bad.
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
Are you in the US? This may be a cultural difference.
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u/Larnek Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
Yep, US. Graduated in 2002. My chick bad and baddies was already common speak. Also, I went to high school a couple of hours from Atlanta, so maybe we were early adopters of something for once.
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
Are you black? I looked up the etymology of the phrase "baddies" and it said 2010's.
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u/Larnek Shower Beer Scholar 5h ago
Nope, just spent plenty of time in the deep south.
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u/teddyspaghettie Identity Alchemist 3h ago
You're wild dude. And really out of touch.
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u/Logan_510 Hungry man 5h ago
My bad, I did not realize it was an AAVE term, so I wouldn't have been aware of it as I'm the 2nd whitest person on the planet. When did white culture appropriate it?
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u/Rabble_Runt Shower Beer Scholar 6h ago
I am happy for you, and would also encourage guarding your heart.
If she is carrying trauma from the past, she needs to work through that before she can fully commit to the relationship you both deserve.
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u/PienerCleaner Shower beer Scholar 5h ago
Listen, you will make mistakes. But he accountable for them and never stop trying to improve.
Above all, be even more considerate than you think you're capable of being. You might feel a little anxious but she will appreciate you being willing to prioritize her comfort, feelings, and her overall experience.
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u/Sad-Boss7879 Duder 6h ago edited 4h ago
You’re in your late 30s and using words like baddie and bagged? You sound like you’re 25.
This has got to be a shit post.
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u/throw_RA_4771 Protein Prophet 6h ago
I just hope we won't see depressing posts from you in few months. Good luck bro.
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u/hoist_off Air Fryer Aristocrat 5h ago
How are you in love with her when you just started going on dates? Do I sense a bit of a one-sided obsession?
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u/renebeans Air Fryer Aristocrat 6h ago
Two dates does not a bag make but I’m glad you’re having a good time!
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u/Aviva-StGermain Girl Lurker 6h ago
Good for you, man! Keep respecting her boundaries and I’m sure you’re going to keep that baddie!
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u/Legitimate-Row-8713 BoyDinnerEnjoyer 6h ago
Nice one man, I'm proud of you. I remember I got my first gf in my late 30s and she was legit a 10/10 hot girl. I wasn't even trying to get with her, I was just nice and she nudged me to a date in which I said sure why not. One thing led to another and I've been with her for 2 years now.
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u/whitecatsup Protein Prophet 6h ago
If your breathing and have your bills paid then be proud. Doesn’t matter if your broke as long as what’s needed to be done is done.🫡
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u/iamcornbread Shower Beer Scholar 6h ago
Good for you for going after something you want and like you said if it doesn’t work out. You have that under your belt! You LIVED life, took a chance at something, didn’t allow fear to rule you. That’s the real accomplishment here. Your baddie is just the cherry on top. Godspeed
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u/TorontoRin BoyDinnerEnjoyer 5h ago
what is msing? in the what you said "We took a week off msing and recovered."
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u/MuffinMan_Jr Grill Pilled 4h ago
Ayee Big W's! When I asked out my coworker she gave me a fake number so im happy one of us is winning 😭
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u/super_sayanything Hungry man 4h ago
Be cool… it’s a second date. I never take anything serious even in thought until after a fourth. But good luck!
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u/dreadstrong97 Big Dill Energy 3h ago
My parents met at work and were married for 25 years until my dad was widowed.
I think work is a great place to meet people. Keep it up, make her feel like a princess, dont be weird, and make her cum a lot.
Rock on, bro 😉
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u/AdunfromAD Fridge Light Philosopher 3h ago
Just keep taking it slow and move at the speed she wants. Congrats, man.
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u/Diamonddog9900 Big Dill Energy 2h ago
Didn't some guy just post about losing a girl who had cancer as a kid and she was a gigantic mess?
She was cheating?
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u/videogames_ Hungry man 51m ago
It’s fine to date a coworker. The issue is when there’s management stuff in there or you’re trying to date more than one coworker.
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u/youngjetson Boy Dinner Enjoyer 5h ago
Ayy good shit my boy. I’m 33 and still calling fine chicks baddies. When they’re bad, they’re baddies!
I also went on a second date last night with a Colombian baddie! She’s fine as hell and I like her vibe. The date (sushi) went well, and hoping to see her again next week when I return from a trip.
Good luck on date #3 bro, let us know how it goes!
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u/Interesting-Mud1506 Girl Lurker 6h ago
Now do what has to be done:
PUMP N DUMP
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u/Upbeat-Draw- Hungry man 4h ago
#1 don’t shit where you eat
#2 I hope you make money they are expensive
#3 have the money talk now rather then getting suckered by the pussy and end up going broke for it
#4 don’t lead with your dick, lead with your financial brain and plan accordingly
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