Rules:

Well, I handed in my notice, and my manager didn't take it very well. I told him I'd decided to move on and gave him my notice period, expecting to finish my remaining shifts as normal. Instead, he got annoyed and said that if I'd already decided I didn't want to work there anymore, there was no point keeping me around. He told me not to come back and said I was done effective immediately.

I honestly wasn't expecting that, but I'm not going to beg him to keep me. He seemed to think I'd change my mind when he told me I was fired, but I just collected my things and left. A couple of my coworkers messaged me afterward asking what happened, so apparently word got around pretty quickly.

The good news is that I'd already started looking at other jobs before handing in my notice. I've got a couple of places I'm planning to contact, and I'm going to try to arrange some interviews over the next few days. I'm obviously not thrilled about losing my income sooner than expected, but bartending jobs seem fairly easy to find around here, especially if you have experience.

Looking back, I probably should have waited until I had another job confirmed before giving notice. Still, I don't regret deciding to leave. I don't want to work somewhere that treats my days off like I'm supposed to be sitting at home waiting for a call.

I'll update again once I know how the job search goes

I work at a department store. Employees get 25% off, and the discount is tied to our employee number. We can use it for ourselves and our immediate household. It says so in the handbook, and they do audits.

Jasmine started a couple months ago in a different department. She's been using her own discount, which is fine, but she already hit the yearly cap. The discount only works up to $2,000 a year, and she spent hers on stuff for her mom, sisters, and cousins.

Last week she asked if she could ring things through on my number. Her cousin's baby shower is coming up and she wants to get the crib and stroller set, which is around $900.

I told her I couldn't. Loss prevention flags it when your number shows up on stuff that doesn't match your household, and my friend in shoes got written up last year for exactly this. I said I'd tell her about any sales coming up, and that the store has a registry discount if the cousin signs up, which is 15%.

She said everyone does it and I was being dramatic. Now she tells people I'm "stingy with my discount," like it's money out of my pocket that I'm keeping from her.

I can't risk my job over someone else's baby shower. AITJ?

tl;dr: A coworker maxed out her employee discount on her family and asked to use my number for a $900 baby shower purchase. I said no because it can get me written up, and now I'm "stingy."

My husband died while we we’re separated owing me 15k in child support. When he died I wanted nothing to do with his funeral. His father kept all his belongings new phone new laptop tools dvds and sold his van for 10k. They gave me nothing n gave our daughter one earring from his ear when he died which she thought was gross. They’ve had nothing to do with her since. Am I the jerk for wanting to sue them?

My partner and I (both early 30s F) are looking to take the next step in our relationship by moving in together. I’m fortunate to own a small, older home through a bizarre and sad set of family circumstances, so she would be moving in with me. We are both low-income in an expensive area; I make a little less than she does. I still have a mortgage — about $1800/mo — that I admittedly struggle to pay.

My proposal is that she pay half the utilities and food plus $250 in rent. (For comparison, renting just a room in a house in my area typically costs about $1200-1400.) My logic for the rent is that having an extra person in the house adds additional wear and tear to everything in the home — more loads of laundry and dishes, more going into the septic system (and therefore pumping it more frequently), more wear and tear on the wood floors and furniture, and so on. Her rent would also contribute to minor repairs that we might need.

My partner was happy to pay for half of utilities and food, but she objects to paying the rent, saying she’s my partner and she doesn’t want to feel like a tenant. She also argues that she’s doesn’t have a stake in the property; she is not suggesting she should have one since we’re not married yet, but she feels it’s not right to help pay for a property she doesn’t own. I get why she feels a little awkward. But I feel like if you live in a place, you should contribute to that place’s upkeep.

TL;DR My gf and I want to live together in my house. My girlfriend is fine with paying for half of utilities and food, but she objects to paying rent because she doesn’t want to feel like a tenant. Rent would be $250/mo and would go toward the property’s various repairs. AITJ for charging my gf rent?

It's been about a day since I posted, and I wanted to give an update because a lot of people suggested I stop discussing this verbally with my manager and start keeping things documented.

Today, my manager pulled me aside again and said the new employee was still struggling and that I needed to take more responsibility for getting him up to speed. I told him the same thing I said before: I'm happy to train the guy during my normal working hours, but I'm not staying late for free. My manager said this attitude wasn't helping anyone and that he expected more cooperation from me.

I decided not to argue about it anymore. After that conversation, I sent him an email summarizing what we'd discussed and making it clear that I was available to help train the new employee during my scheduled shifts. I also asked him to let me know which of my regular tasks he wanted me to prioritize so I could fit the training into my workload. He hasn't responded yet.

The new employee actually seems like a decent guy, and I don't blame him for any of this. He told me today that he felt bad about me having to stay late because of him. I explained that it wasn't his fault and that management needed to figure out a proper training schedule.

I'm going to see how things play out over the next few days, but I'm not planning to change my mind about unpaid overtime. I also started looking at a few other job listings, because even if this blows over, I'm not sure I want to keep working somewhere that treats my free time like it's part of my job.

TL;DR: My manager confronted me again about the new employee falling behind, so I followed up by email and offered to train him during my normal shifts. The new guy isn't the problem, and I'm starting to look at other jobs.

Went on a weekend trip with three friends and rented an Airbnb under my account.

One of them decided to dye her hair purple in the bathroom the night before we left. I told her it was a terrible idea because the bathroom had white tiles and grout. She said she'd be careful.

Well, she wasn't. There were purple stains around the shower drain and on the bathmat. She tried cleaning everything before checkout but some of it wouldn't come off.

The host sent me pictures afterward and charged $220 for cleaning and replacing the bathmat.

I asked my friend to cover it since she caused the damage. She offered $100 and said the host was ripping us off and I should've disputed the charge instead of accepting it.

She's now telling our other friends I'm making her pay for something that would've cost $20 to clean.

I do think $220 is excessive, but I also don't see why I should be stuck dealing with it.

TL;DR: Friend stained our Airbnb bathroom with hair dye. Host charged $220 and she thinks I'm a jerk for expecting her to cover the full amount.

I figured I'd update since a few people asked whether I was still cleaning for Joanne.

Short answer: no, but things got a little awkward before we got there.

After my original post, I sent Joanne screenshots of our messages from July where she'd specifically chosen to provide her own cleaning supplies instead of paying the extra $15 per visit.

I wasn't trying to start an argument. I just wanted to show her that we had actually discussed it.

She replied saying she remembered the conversation differently and thought the $15 was only for bringing equipment, not cleaning products.

I explained that it covered both, and that I'd been bringing my own supplies because hers kept running out.

She then offered to pay $20 toward the $64 I'd spent, saying that was a reasonable compromise since she hadn't authorized those purchases.

Honestly, I considered accepting it just to avoid the headache.

But what bothered me was that I'd reminded her multiple times to restock, and she'd repeatedly asked me to use mine instead.

I told her I wasn't comfortable continuing unless we agreed on how supplies would be handled going forward.

She said she'd buy everything herself again and asked me to come for our usual Saturday appointment.

I agreed.

When I arrived, she'd restocked the basic cleaning products, but there were no vacuum bags, and the specific polish she wanted for her dining table was still missing.

I pointed it out before starting.

She sighed and said, "You're really going to make this difficult every single week, aren't you?"

That was the moment I decided I couldn't keep doing this.

I told her I was happy to clean the areas I could with the supplies available, but I wouldn't be purchasing anything else out of pocket.

She said she'd rather find someone who was more flexible.

I told her I understood and that it was probably best if we ended our arrangement.

I left without doing the cleaning, and I didn't charge her for the visit.

Later that evening, she sent me a message saying she was disappointed because she'd recommended me to two friends and expected better customer service.

That honestly stung a little because I'd always tried to do a good job for her.

The next day, one of those friends actually contacted me asking if I had any availability.

I explained my rates and the supply options upfront, and she immediately chose the $15 supply fee without questioning it.

We haven't scheduled anything yet, but it was reassuring to have someone understand the arrangement without an argument.

As for Joanne, she eventually sent me the $20 she'd offered earlier. I thanked her and decided not to pursue the remaining $44.

I know some people will probably think I should've stood firm on the full amount, but at this point I'd rather move on.

I'm also changing how I handle new clients. From now on, the supply arrangement will be included in a short written agreement before the first cleaning.

I still feel a little uncomfortable about walking away from a client over what started as cleaning products, especially since I could've just accepted the $20 and continued.

But I also don't think it's reasonable to expect someone running a small side business to keep absorbing costs that weren't included in the original price.

I guess this was an expensive lesson in setting clearer boundaries.

tl;dr: Joanne disputed our original supply agreement even after I showed her our messages. She offered $20 toward the $64 I'd spent and promised to restock everything, but the next appointment had missing supplies again. When I refused to keep buying products myself, she decided to find another cleaner. I ended the arrangement and am now putting supply agreements in writing.

My manager has been a bit cold toward me since the whole thing happened. Nothing major, but he's been making little comments about how he needs people he can rely on and how some people don't understand what being part of a team means. I'm still showing up for my scheduled shifts and doing my job properly, but honestly, I'm tired of the attitude.

I've decided I'm going to quit. I know it's probably not the smartest move to leave a job without another one lined up, but I've been looking at bartending jobs nearby, and there are more openings than I expected. Experienced bartenders seem to be in demand, so I'm confident I can find something else without being unemployed for too long.

I'm going to give my notice rather than just walk out. I don't want to burn bridges or leave my coworkers in a bad position, but I also don't want to keep working somewhere I'm expected to be available at any hour without being paid for it. If I'm not scheduled, I want to be able to enjoy my day off without worrying that I'll get a message at 3am and be called unreliable for saying no.

I'll update again once I've figured out my next move.

My sister has been telling people for years that I gave up a trip to Europe to help her when my niece was born.

The actual story is that I was considering going to Italy with two friends, but never booked anything. Around the same time my sister had her daughter and I helped her out quite a bit.

Somehow those two things turned into this huge family story about how I sacrificed my dream vacation for her baby.

At dinner recently my niece, who's 12 now, brought it up and said she felt bad that I'd missed out on Europe because of her.

I laughed and told her I never actually booked the trip, and that helping with her as a baby wasn't some terrible sacrifice. I wanted to be there.

My sister got annoyed afterward and said I made her look like a liar in front of her daughter. She thinks I should've just accepted the compliment instead of correcting a story that's been told for years.

I wasn't trying to embarrass her. I just thought it was weird that my niece felt guilty about something that didn't even happen.

TL;DR: Corrected a story my sister has told for years about me sacrificing a European vacation to help raise her daughter. Sister thinks I embarrassed her for no reason.

Honestly, I'm getting tired of having the same conversation over and over. I don't want to spend every week arguing about whether he used my food or waiting for him to replace things he promised to replace. So I've started looking into getting a mini fridge for my room as many of you have suggested. I found one pretty cheap on Facebook Marketplace, and I'm going to go look at it soon to make sure it actually works before buying it.

It might seem a little ridiculous to have a separate fridge in my bedroom when there's already one in the kitchen, but at this point, I'd rather spend a bit of money upfront than keep losing groceries. I can keep my meal prep and anything expensive in there, and he won't have an excuse to use it without asking.

I haven't told him about the fridge yet because I don't really see the point in announcing it. If he asks why I'm moving some of my food, I'll explain it, but I'm not planning to start another argument over it.

TL;DR: I'm tired of arguing with my roommate about my groceries, so I'm looking into buying a mini fridge for my room. I found a cheap one on Facebook Marketplace and will be checking it out soon.

*I know it’s long. Please read it all though. I can’t tell if I’m taking it too seriously*

I commissioned an artist whose first language is not English and it went well. Then I commissioned them a second time and there were some bumps in the road but nothing crazy.

This third time I requested a concept and I provided lots of written detail (like paragraphs) and visual aids. I wrote it in their native language. I always ask them to tell me if something doesnt make sense.

I respond between 30mins-1hr of them messaging me.

They went ahead and did a rough draft and sent it to me and then sent a proposal for me to submit payment but the piece they sent did not include 2 big details I wrote out. It wasn’t what I asked for.

The website we communicate on was down so I was going to use a different platform to reach out to them about how to remedy the situation and saw that they posted they wasted their time on a project for a client and that the client (me) didn’t like what they did.

I didn’t say anything.

Whatever was going on with the primary site we used got fixed and they messaged me about if I still wanted to do the concept.

I let them know I saw the tweet and that there were things literally missing from the piece and I didn’t want to move forward with something I didn’t ask for in the most respectful way I could say it.

I told them I’d stay up to troubleshoot and try to see what parts we could salvage and maybe re-work. They apologized and said it was on them for not organizing themselves better.

(there are external/environmental things in their area that makes it hard for them to create their art but I never complain about it. It’s out of their control)

For me, I prefer to commission the same artist til I run out of ideas. I really believe in supporting small artists. Human artists.

This artist did do great on the first one and fixed what needed fixing on this second one but then they left an artist review on my account for other artists to see that said I was respectful and gave clear requirements but that the difficulties were the personality mismatch which (from my pov) makes it seem like I’m the issue?!!

they acknowledged that they didn’t follow the details I wrote out. They admitted they weren’t organized about things and then they leave that review.

am I misinterpreting?

The review they left was for the second commission. The 3rd project (the one they sketched up the incorrect details for) wasnt even started/paid for. I was telling them my ideas and asking which would be easier to do.

I think the review they left for the second project was actually them being upset about me not moving forward with their freestyled take on the third.

why am I so irritated? We can’t see each others reviews beforehand. I leave mine and they leave theirs and only after both are submitted, are we able to view what we got.

Despite everything I still have them 5 stars. I tried to give them grace. Plus they’re really young and still learning how to handle clients.

why spend all day apologizing and then collaborating on how to fix the draft if the personality of the client was difficult?

I feel like a fkn moron for being so forgiving/understanding.

I don’t want to commission them anymore.

AITJ?!

Thank you to everyone who commented on the original post, i really appreciate the clarity that i was not in the wrong there!

UPDATE: i politely messaged her the next day asking if she could let me know in advance about cancelling / rescheduling plans as i commute back home for work on weekends. She then went on to the messages shown above and ended the friendship, problem solved!

I work as a bartender, and our schedule is usually posted well in advance. Yesterday was my day off, so I went out with some friends and had a few drinks. At around 3am, my manager messaged me saying someone had called out and he needed me to come in at 11am. I told him I couldn't make it because I'd already been drinking and wasn't going to show up hungover for a shift.

He started saying it was unprofessional and unreliable to make myself unavailable when the bar needed me, and that I should have known better than to drink when I might be needed the next morning. I told him I wasn't scheduled to work, nobody had asked me to be on call, and I didn't get paid enough to organize my days off around the possibility that someone else might call out. If I have a shift the next day, obviously I don't go out drinking the night before, but I don't think I should have to follow that rule on my days off too.

He wasn't happy with that answer and said being part of a team means being willing to step up when things go wrong. I told him I understood that, but being willing to help occasionally is different from being expected to stay ready for work every day, even when I'm not scheduled. I stopped replying after that.

When I went back for my next scheduled shift, things were awkward. My manager barely spoke to me, and another bartender mentioned that the morning had been slammed because they were short-staffed. I felt a little bad for the people who had to deal with it, but I still don't think that makes it my responsibility. This also isn't the first time I've been asked to cover at the last minute, and I'm starting to get tired of it.

I'm honestly considering looking for another bartending job. There are plenty of bars around here, and from what I've heard, experienced bartenders are in demand. I haven't quit or anything, but if my manager expects me to be available whenever he needs someone, I don't see why I should stay somewhere that doesn't pay me to be on call. AITJ?

TL;DR: My manager messaged me at 3am asking me to cover an 11am shift on my day off. I'd already been drinking, so I refused to show up hungover. He called me unprofessional and unreliable for not being ready to work, but I told him I don't get paid enough to be on call on my days off. Now things are awkward at work, and I'm considering looking for another bartending job. AITJ?

My manager hired a new employee a few weeks ago and assigned me to train him. I don't mind helping someone learn the job, but the problem is that my manager expects me to stay after work to do it.

I'm already busy with my own workload, so there's no time to properly train him during the day. Instead, my manager keeps telling me to stay an extra hour or two after my shift to show him everything. I'm not getting paid extra for this, and when I asked if I could get overtime or have some of my regular tasks reassigned, my manager said I needed to be a team player.

I've done it a few times because I didn't want to leave the new guy struggling, but I'm getting tired of losing my evenings because management can't organize things properly. I have my own life outside work, and I'm not interested in giving up several hours a week for free.

Yesterday, my manager asked me to stay late again, and I told him I wouldn't be doing any more training after my shift unless I was being paid for the extra time. He got annoyed and said the new employee was falling behind because I wasn't putting in enough effort. I pointed out that I'm happy to train him during my normal working hours, but I'm not working unpaid overtime.

Now my manager is acting like I'm being difficult, and I'm worried he'll make this a bigger issue than it needs to be. AITJ?

TL;DR: My manager expects me to train a new employee after work without extra pay. I refused to keep doing unpaid overtime, and now he's blaming me for the new hire falling behind.

Throwaway because the journalist is on reddit. im Alban Toulemonde (not real, just in case for book or course). Sorry its long.

I (19M) am travelling alone in Australia for the first time. I have a medical condition (it is in my records) and a very tight budget untill I find work. I booked a room for 350$ a week because everything else was gone. The host is not some family, he has multiple listings in a city where people cant find a place to live, so you understand the type.
Before I arrived I asked nicely many times if he could do 300$, because I have no money and alone. He said no. Fine, I paid and I was an examplary guest, I swear on my life. After week one he moved me to his other house, no discount, I said nothing. 3 weeks total, 1050$, not one complaint from him.
Last day I asked to stay in another room or for late checkout because I had no place yet. He said no aswell. He knew I had nowhere to go. I checked out, went to the beach all afternoon, and that night I get a photo of a toilet overflowing and a claim for 1700$. More than the 3 weeks. My GPS timeline shows I was at the beach the entire afternoon. Satellites are on my side, his photo has no time on it. Which one is a fact. I said "Thank you for this wonderful image, it will help my case" and I dispute this claim in full. He said I am lying. Third time.

I posted the photo on a forum because something looked off and alot of people agreed. Support saw it. Last week they closed his claim in my favour (verified by support). I WON.
I told him on day one in writing, apologise, withdraw the claim, refund me and we forget this. He did not. Now, after the decision, he is still sending "evidence" and says he will "take it further". He wrote "the toilet was fine before you arrived". Ok. It was fine, I was at the beach, Airbnb agreed with me, so who was in the room? Very ironic that the person with the keys to both houses is still asking me.
Worst of all, after he lost he messaged my mother. In another country. Not only is this predatory, it is beyond cruel to someone alone in a foreign country. Two panic attacks, no place to sleep tomorrow. I will pay him whatever he wants if he can prove I was there. He cant, because I wasnt.
A journalist found me through the forum and wants to publish this week. I said yes. Now he says I am "harassing" him and it is "over" so I should "move on". Over for who. He never apologised, support had to do it for him. If you charge a 19 year old 1700$ with no proof and lose, you ruined your own business, and if he is embarassed now that is
My friend says I won, let it go. My family says he needs to learn so he never does this to another guest, a friend of my family is a lawyer and says the same.

So AITA for
saying yes to the journalist after I already won
asking and getting for the 3 weeks refunded for the stress
not deleting the forum post like he asked
Write a book or create a course about this to help people

Would you let it go? I promise you I am honest, I never had a problem with a host before

TL;DR host tried to scam me 1700$ but I won. Should I go on the news?

I live with a roommate who has a habit of using my groceries without asking. At first, it was small stuff like milk, eggs, or a bit of butter, and I didn't really care. But lately, he's been using more expensive things too, like the meat I buy for meal prep, cheese, and ingredients for specific meals. I'll come home planning to cook something, only to find out half the ingredients are gone.

I've tried bringing it up casually a few times, but he always says he'll replace everything on his next grocery run. That rarely happens, and when it does, he'll buy some cheap alternative that doesn't even match what he used. I ended up having to make extra trips to the store or change what I was planning to cook.

Last week, I bought ingredients for several meals, including a pack of steak that I was saving for the weekend. By Friday, he'd already used it, along with some other stuff I'd bought. When I asked him about it, he said he was going to replace it eventually and acted like I was making a big deal out of nothing.

I told him I was tired of paying for his groceries and that if he wanted to use my food, he needed to ask first and replace exactly what he took. He got annoyed and said that since we share a kitchen, I should be more flexible instead of treating every item like it's off-limits. I told him sharing a kitchen doesn't mean sharing everything in the fridge.

Now he's barely talking to me and seems to think I'm being unreasonable. I don't mind sharing occasionally, but I'm not interested in subsidizing another adult's grocery bill every week.

AITJ for insisting he replace what he takes, or am I being too strict about groceries when we live together?

TL;DR: My roommate keeps using my groceries without asking and rarely replaces them properly. When I finally told him he needs to replace what he takes, he accused me of being unreasonable because we share a kitchen. Now I'm wondering if I'm being too petty about it.

Our HOA has a five-person board and two seats opened up this fall. At the annual meeting, which I couldn't attend because I was at work, my neighbor Sharon nominated me. Apparently people agreed because I'm "organized" and "good with numbers." I'm an accountant.

I found out the next morning from an email that said "Congrats, you've been nominated for treasurer!"

I emailed the board that same day and thanked them, but said I wasn't able to take it on. I work 50-plus hours a week during tax season and I have two young kids. I offered to look over the budget once a year as a volunteer if that would help, since that's probably what they wanted me for anyway.

Sharon called me that evening. She said nobody else would do it, that the last treasurer quit in June, and that if I didn't step up, the HOA would have to hire a management company, which would raise our dues by about $40 a month. She said that was going to be "on me."

Since then a couple of neighbors have made comments when I'm out walking the dog. "Oh, here's our almost-treasurer."

I never asked to be nominated. Am I the jerk for saying no?

tl;dr: Neighbors nominated me as HOA treasurer at a meeting I couldn't attend, because I'm an accountant. I declined but offered a yearly budget review, and now I'm being blamed if dues go up.

It's been another couple of days, and I ended up reporting Dale to our manager. I wasn't planning to do it this soon, but after the last comment and hearing that he was telling people I was trying to get him fired, I decided I was done waiting for him to figure it out on his own.

I asked my manager if we could talk privately and explained what had been happening. I told her about the comments he kept making about my food, how I'd already asked him to stop, and how he kept brushing it off as a joke. I also mentioned that he'd started telling other coworkers I was trying to get him fired, even though I hadn't reported anything until now. I made it clear that I wasn't asking for him to be punished or fired. I just wanted the comments to stop, and I'd tried handling it directly first.

My manager took it more seriously than I expected. She asked me to give her a few specific examples of what he'd said and when it happened. She also asked whether anyone else had witnessed it, so I mentioned the coworker who had recently admitted he'd noticed Dale only made these comments about my food. She said she'd look into it and speak with Dale herself.

Dale found out that I'd spoken to her later that afternoon. He didn't confront me directly, but one of our coworkers told me he'd been complaining that I'd gone behind his back instead of talking to him. I honestly don't know what else he expected me to do. I'd already told him to stop more than once, and his response was to keep doing it and then tell people I was trying to get him fired.

The weirdest part is that another coworker who used to laugh at his jokes has stopped reacting to them entirely. I don't know if it's because of my report or if he just started noticing the pattern, but it's interesting how quickly something stops being funny when people realize they're laughing at the same person over and over.

I haven't heard anything else from my manager yet, and I'm not going to chase her for an update after one day. I just want to be able to eat my lunch without having to defend it or listen to Dale's commentary. If he wants to think I'm being unreasonable for reporting him after repeatedly asking him to stop, that's up to him.

TL;DR: I reported Dale to our manager after he kept making comments about my Thai food and started telling coworkers I was trying to get him fired. My manager asked for examples and said she'd look into it. Dale is now complaining that I went behind his back, even though I'd already tried dealing with him directly.