Inhalant Use in Young People

Please don't attack me for being stupid or naive.

My (now ex)boyfriend was always controlling and abusive but he started smoking crack (freebase) in december 2025, so 10 months ago. Since then he has cheated on me with many women and prostitues, gave me gonorreah, lied about it, beat me up once when i was aggressive towards him and talks stuff that makes no sense, is talking to GROK all day about conspiracy theories, is on crack binges for day, doesnt sleep, sends me nude photos of the women he has sex with, covers his window with a blanket (?), wrote me in the name of his mother that he has passed away, i believed it for 1 hour i thought he was dead, i was giving myself the fault because i left him alone and i was screaming, crying drove to his place, to his moms place and brothers place who told me that that wasnt true.

EDIT: he is almost smoking it everyday. the whole time. about 24 days in a month.

I have never done coke or crack. WTF IS THIS HELL?????

I Think (fairly sure) I’m an Addict

I’ll try keep this as short as possible.

I started drinking and smoking cigs young (around 15/16) and got into weed when I was in my later teens. I always told myself I’d kick the habit when I turned 18. I had a tough time in my teens and liked to escape.

Was a daily smoker of weed as I was turning into an adult, and any chance outside of work or college I’d smoke a joint. I missed a lot of college just from being a stoner and it was kinda becoming my personality. I still got my degree. Anyway, I took a step back with it about 3 years ago and I no longer smoke daily but I would have one every couple of weeks. During my college days though I got into harder stuff like pills, MDMA and ket. Myself and my pals would be at it most weekends.

That was fun, had some great times and I thought I grew out of it but I moved to a city where this shit was everywhere and fell back into the trap but the new thing was Coke. I was taking it a lot and realised I needed to leave that environment so I decided to go home.

Now I’ve moved to my local area and I genuinely can’t stop taking Coke. Like it’s always around me with most of my “friends” and I can’t seem to stop. On a night out, I’m itching to get some and more often than not find it. It’s come to the point too where I’ve crossed the line (lol) and had it sober too, fucking scary man.

The problem is me, not the location or people around me.

This shit has its claws in me tight, but so did the weed and I managed to get out of it so I’m confident I can turn this around. I’ve told a couple of close friends about this but as much as I love them, they’re not really good at helping.

I’m not sure why I’m asking this, maybe a cry for help? Has anyone gotten out of this? Any advice?

I’m 19 years old and I’ve been addicted to various forms of synthetic weed since I was 13 or 14 years old. I’ve made multiple attempts to quit, but the strong urges/terrible withdraws drew me back every time. I’m struggling so bad now to the point where I keep hitting a further and further rock bottom. I’d like to change, but I’m wonder why I should? I know my life would be better but how? Why?

If you are sober please tell me,
What was your “why” for quitting?

Thank you.

IM LOST GUYS (16m)
Im 16 and i have been using drugs since the start of the year heavily to cope with my depression and my childhood traumas and my situation, i started with alcohol, then weed then xans and then it went all downhill, i lost like 2 months ago a girl i talked to for 8 months, she broke up with me because of my heavy use (i did over 70gs of ketamine and alot more), my dad just refused a partial heart transplant and there is a big chance hes going to die in the next 5 years, my mom might’ve breast cancer, its not sure but shes going to know tomorrow, my granda is dying and i went to visit her on monday and she cried looking at me saying she wants to walk before she dies, my sister will probably loose her job (im not on good terms with her but it still makes me sad), my parents are divorced and are fighting but they dont want to make it obvious, my best friends dog has cancer and hes fucking sad and idk how to help but im trying, i have been lately falling more into addiction, mainly oxycodone and xanax or any other benzo pretty much, i have a history with self harm and i attempted suicide like a month and a half ago, i hate my life tbh, im just in my bed alone and im sad, i dont really have many friends, and lately ive been told that im a alot better person sober than high, but ive been getting high to not be stuck in my head, one positive i see is im going to start therapy early the next month, im still torn about my ex, im trying to reconcile but its maybe a bad idea, if anyone cares my top 5 drugs of choice unordered:oxy, xanax, lsd, molly, ketamine, idk what else to say my life has been going to shit, i posted already somewhere before so please read that too, im high again on oxy (80mgs deep) and im kinda sad tbh, if anybody wants to talk or ask or try to help me please reach out i will not turn anyone down if they are respectful🫶

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Like, I didn't start using because I was bored or looking for fun. I started because something inside me felt empty and wrong, and the substance was the only thing that made sense at the time. Wondering if that's a common experience or if I'm just rationalizing things. How did your addiction actually start for you?

I'm a recovering crystal meth addict. and I've quit Crystal and alcohol, but I was still using shrooms. Then the shrooms made me decide to do some MDMA... Then I crushed up the MDMA and snorted it.

Then 2 weeks later I relapsed on crystal.

So, I can't be fucking around with other shit if it's leading to me relapsing, so I'm just gonna go 100% sober for 1 year and see how that goes

Me (20m) and my GF (20f) have been in a long distance/online relationship for over a year now. And yesterday I finally told my GF about my porn addiction. And its probably gonna cause this relationship to end. I made this account to post anonymously as I my GF and friends have reddit and I'm too ashamed to make any of this about myself to them. This is a long post.

Background info: I was assaulted when I was about the age of 9ish, I can't remember the exact time as I had blocked it out of my memory for a long time. But when I was 10 I got my first phone and only a few months later started watching porn. And it slowly ramped up more and more. It became a full blow addiction and I never admitted it to myself till yesterday. And because of this I grew to be hypersexual. And I really hate it, I really often feel disgusting about myself to the point where I want to be castrated in some capacity so I can remove most if not all of my sex drive. I also have never had a relationship before this one. And have not had my first kiss yet. Nor have I ever been complimented outside of this relationship. Leading me to be really insecure about myself, especially when it comes to sexual and physical attraction.
My GF lives across the country from me (U.S.) and we haven't seen each other in person yet. She has borderline personality disorder and is autistic. She has a hard time expressing herself to me, especially because I have a hard time comforting other people too that isn't just being next to them. When we met we decided to enter an official talking stage, but it didn't last long. As 5 days after we first met here on reddit (different sub) I asked her to be my GF, and not even 3 hours later I told her I loved her. Very fast I know, but its my first relationship ever. And the biggest piece of info is that she said watching porn is cheating, and I agreed to it.

But once we became official I somehow easily dropped all porn. Very easily. I thought it would be a much harder time but I didn't have a hard time for some reason. And I felt pretty good about it. But over time we stopped being sexual together. Which she preferred as she didn't really want to be due to some shitty stuff that happened to her in the past. And I was okay with it for the most part. I don't care about sex that much, especially because I hated how I was hypersexual. But I still did want to be sexual, it just wasn't a priority. But whenever I would try to bring it up I would go about it almost the wrong way every single time. So it never ended well as it would quickly turn into an argument instead about how I only wanted sex and wanted her for her body. Which wasn't true but I still made her feel like that's what I wanted and that is on me.

It got to the point where some random day in July (the month of our 1 year anniversary) I couldn't help myself and I watched some porn, and my addiction started again. And I've been trying really hard to stop, but I can't help myself.

Then during this month we got into a fight about how neither of us open up to each other. And at the end of it I asked if I could vent about how I had been feeling in general. And part of that venting was a sexual section about how I don't feel wanted at all. And that "I wanted to feel wanted, especially sexually." Not instead of just saying "I don't feel wanted by you and its hurting me" I blabbered on more about sexual stuff and how I wanted her to "send me a nude randomly" or "ask me for a dick pick" and just really stupid shit that conveyed a completely different point than the one I wanted. I was an idiot about it and so that's when she first asked me if I watched porn. I liked and said no. And so because of that messaged I sent she would keep asking me if I watched porn. And I kept lying to her and saying no. I do not know why I was just honest, I've never really lied about something this important before. I think it was because we agreed it was cheating and I didn't wanna be another guy who cheated on her like her ex. Or maybe it was because I am ashamed. I do not know and can't tell you as I don't know myself.

But it all came to a head yesterday, where she was not letting it go and kept asking me if I did. I had complained about my sexuality and said "My body wants it but not my mind" which she said was a clue I watched porn. She said she had gone through it too and "So please, let me actually help u" which felt like she really was there to help. Then she also said she wouldn't break up with me if I did. She doesn't lie to me. I can't think of a single time that she has. And eventually in another couple messages I admitted it.

Then like any other reasonable person, she questioned if I had lied about anything else. Like if I was talking to other girls, which I haven't. She said she was disappointed in me because I kept lying to her. And that she needed time to process it. All of which is fair and I'm not holding any of it against her. But since she got this out of me I have finally admitted to myself that its an addiction and I need help. I had therapy only a few hours after this conversation with her and my therapist said many things, like "I'm just trying to fulfill my sexual needs" or things that would help me feel better. Which helped in the moment, but it doesn't help long term.

Then just a few hours ago, my GF messaged me again saying she was feeling suicidal, and it was because of me. I tried my best to comfort her, but again I suck at it. So with that and on top of the fact that I'm the one who hurt her so badly she feels that way it didn't go well. She let some anger out at me. She called me selfish, entitled, immature and a cheater. And said to not be surprised if I end up blocked.

I'm not asking for sympathy. Regardless of my addiction or not I did cheat on my Girlfriend and hurt her badly to the point where she is probably wanting to break up with me. I would like some advice on how to move forward, whether or not I will still have a relationship. And if my Girlfriend doesn't break up with me, how do I show her I really do care and comfort her through this?

This is gonna be kind of long. I’m sorry in advance.

I’m coming up on almost a month sober from meth. This is about how far I made it last time before I relapsed so it’s worrying me.

The past three mornings in a row I woke up with the intense urge to use meth. To buy it, to use it, to just feel high and out of my mind.

I would be lying if I said I didn’t fucking miss it tremendously. I’ve been able to curb these moments with weed (I used weed before meth), painting, and just keeping myself very busy.

Today, I’m really having a hard time. I’m in an extremely triggering environment, I’m dealing with a lot of stress with my family. I even hit up my plug today to see if he’s still selling. I told him a lie about a friend wanting to know (haha what friends ????????), and he said he’s not gonna sell it anymore period.

So now I feel really angry with myself because I AM THE REASON he stopped selling it. And now I’ll never get it again!!! WHICH IS FINE, however idk what to do with this extremely intense craving/need I’m having right now.

It’s making me want to seek out other sources, find new connections, ask the lady I saw tweaking at dollar tree the other day. All extremely unsafe and things I am definitely NOT going to do.

I also have all these horrible thoughts about how I look, that I’m disgusting, unattractive, and gaining weight (I really don’t think I am) but if I were still using meth I wouldn’t even need to worry. I have disordered eating and meth definitely made that the worst it’s ever been in my life. But now I’m afraid to eat because if I gain weight, I will be even more upset with myself.

Can anyone relate? How do you cope? What do you do when you feel this way? I just don’t know what to do.

Tw

As a victim of abuse and adjacent behaviours since kindergarten, I(21) developed cptsd, ocd and other mental illness symptoms, and am fixated on my past.

I would:
•Watch porn that’s violent and degrading (what I’ve been taught relationships are growing up)
•Check people from my past’s social media
•Sext violent and misogynistic men similar to ppl from my past
•Scroll through social media content related to my past

I would try to quit but relapse. Every time I relapse, I get triggered and flashbacks, as if I’m reliving the event. This makes healing hard. It’s one step forward and back to square one. These actions do not make me feel good. But for some reason, I’m addicted and cannot let go of the pain.

Anyone has advice or experience dealing with this? Thank you in advance. :(

War stories, amirite?

Like, what's up with that? Why do I get the sense there's this part of me that thinks he's cool because he's had knives pointed at him by multiple psycho tweakers? This shit ain't fun. I'm tired of being assaulted and all the trauma dumping they (and I) do ... All the messiness and the paranoia and bullshit.

I'm tired of people stealing from me. I'm tired of being a crazy tweaker myself doing all sorts of WACK shit. And I mean WACK. Like shirtless & barefoot walking on snow packed ice wack. Waist deep in a creek in 30-degree weather after running away from hallucinated orbs late at night deep in the woods wack. Walking bad neighborhoods with most of the houses boarded up at 1am looking for my car I just up and walked away from for the 20th time wack. And I've gotta be over here like, "Ope! Just another Sunday, hehe. "

No. This is not cool. This is not the life for me. I am not tough. I am not some street smart weekend "warrior." I am not some interesting lifer. I am a troubled drug addict who's lucky to be alive. I'm lucky to have a job (which I might actually lose next week, after 18 years employed, which I've no-call-no-showed at at least 7 times), by the way.

This isn't some movie. We don't have plot armor. I'm not living my life to have lots of crazy stories to tell. I want a boring, normal, stable life. And oh my god, all the people I've slept with, ugggh! Yuk! I don't wanna sleep with A-N-Y-B-O-D-Y, yet I turn into the sleaziest slut this side of the country when I'm high. I'll be happy if I only have one STD when I get checked this week, instead of another triple whammy. I can barely go a day without cringing and responding out loud to intrusive thoughts, reminding me of all the embarrassing things I've done when I was high, like "shut up brain!!"

I'm tired of chipped teeth and being underweight. I'm tired of looking gaunt and having dark circles under my eyes. Im tired of losing the awesome person I become week after week and leaving behind a life that is GOOD, that I fucking LIKE, that FEELS GOOD TO LIVE.

I fucking hate drugs. And whatta ya know, after ten years fighting EXTENSIVELY for recovery, my frequency of use has *increased*. Bahahahaha. What a joke.

But hey, I'm 16 days clean right now! That's actually the longest I've been clean in, like, three or four years. Gotta try to save my job and know I tried my best. Wish me luck! And also for all those other times I'm likely bound to use again! Pray for me please! Good vibes, cast a spell ... I'll take anything!!

Good luck out there guys!

21m i have been on meth now for 4 plus years
It honestly just feels like a weight around my neck im always in the frame of mind to want to quit but just can’t seem to, every comedown and end of a party just brings me the same regret! I form a habit of working my ass off Monday to Friday and it’s them couple hours after you get home on a Friday is when the tempting thoughts enter my head, it almost feels like one thought is all it takes to allow it to take over.
The anxiety and helplessness you can feel from having this addiction is frightening and depressing, I’m a normal person I have a good life with good people who love me and honestly I want to excel in the things that I pursue I want to be free of my addiction and I get in my own way constantly, call it self pity but it’s a bad habit with some of the worst self induced side effects I know anyone with advice or who has some helpful insight I would be keen to listen ! Love you all stay safe

2 years ago i used my first opioid codipront and codeine linctus after that i fell in love thru this 2 years i used codeine and oxycodone i felt like it was the piece that was missing it was genuenly the best moments of my short life but after some time i felt like i gotta stop because overweight me who was obese thru his whole life done lost 12kg and it was not healthy kind of way so i looked for alternatives and decided on weed it was ok but obviously not the same but i got caught by the police and my father now gets me tested i want to order again and do it again but i feel like its gonna fuck up my life even more than it did before (i got kicked out of 1 school my ties with my family got way more distant then it ever was and i became a ghost during my opioid addiction i was not going to school not going out not talking with anybody stuff like that u guys got the point)
Note:dont do drugs because you gonna like them and decide to not come back

Hello fellow addicts,

Man I’m ready to be done. The circle never stops and I never stop creating the circles to run around in. I’m insane. I’m completely broken and ready to be done.
Try to make this quick but I have a question if anyone can help.
I was on suboxone for 11years. Steady life and sobriety. But multiple attempts to jump off it proved to be difficult. I took the shot and my life spun out of control. I didn’t go back to H or fet but I got addicted to this 7oh crap.
The silver lining in this whole relapse is how humbled I am. Meetings where never my thing and I find myself crying everytime I go to them now because I see people that have beat this sickness. I see hope and happiness in there eyes. I want what they have so bad. I want 24hrs. I want it bad
This time it will be different for me. But I’m physically reliant on this.

I detoxed for 5days went through withdrawals comparable to Heroine. I think I was taking mgm with the 7oh. Horrible withdrawal. Was hell.

I’m done paying for this so here I am yet again Turing to suboxone.
I just got a 14 day script called in. The doctor asked me what I meant when I said can you give me a taper program. She said people don’t do that..
So here I am asking the internet for help. Anyone recommend an actual schedule for me to not have bad withdrawal?
I was on 500mg of 7oh. Now down to 70mg a day.
I want to take subs for maybe 3-5days.
I know I’m a punk for not being able to go through the whole withdrawal process but I know I’m done with drugs for good. This is the last time God willing and I want to do this right. Anyone who sat through this whole paragraph of complaining I commend you.

Also THANK YOU for any addict that has had the guts to go before me and do this right. To give us who are fucked still hope. Hope that I won’t live in this insanity forever

I have done it all, all advices and changing my habits, going out, going to the gym, writing in journal, everything done it all. I even return home so exhausted I sleep right away, but somehow I still do it, like I am in autopilot, I don't even recall how I do it.

I feel like I am out of options

Hey there! I (29m) quit smoking weed (spliffs, not pure) together with my girlfriend (26f) about two weeks ago today. I feel a bit silly asking questions about such a minor substance in a space where people grapple with much bigger issues, but I tried posting on r/leaves only to have my post instantly removed because I was "asking for medical advice". For the record, I'm not looking for medical advice, I'm just hoping I can get some insight from others that have been in my position.

If it helps, I used to smoke around 3 spliffs every evening. I'm not sure if that's considered to be heavy use or not, but it's enough to give me a hard time kicking the habbit.

First of all, I browsed through a lot of posts here and I really appreciate this community. Standing up for each other, strangers or not, is a very noble thing to do. I can tell a lot of people here wish the best for others and I really appreciate this space for that. Sorry for the little off-topic ramble, I just didn't really know where else to voice this appreciation.

Without further ado, my questions are:

1. I chose to quit by reverting to cigarettes and then building that down. I'm not too pleased about it. Ideally I want to just kick these habbits entirely, but I feel like if I quit nicotine too then the nicotine addiction is going to grab me fully back into restarting the entire thing. Does anyone have any experiences quitting with/without cigarettes? What felt easier to you personally and why? To be clear I know it can differ per person, I'm just in need of people that have been through similar things and can tell me about their experiences, good or bad.
2. My girlfriend and I love playing videogames, both competitive and casual. Ever since we quit weed my girlfriend (who loves playing Valorant) says her aim and general performance got really really bad, to the point she just wants to give up on the game and says she "can't play sober". I personally play a bit more League of Legends but I did notice a big drop in my performance. I personally just chalked it up to having a little dip in performance, but it's really affecting my girlfriend. She seems to think that quitting weed (and starting in the first place) took away one of the things that she loved. Could this be a real thing? Or is it just a coincidence our craving brains chalk up to "it must be because of this thing I crave and no longer have"? Again if anyone has any similar experiences, I would love to chat about them. I know it might sound silly that this is affecting her and myself to a degree so badly, but it's more of a feeling that this change in our life that's difficult enough on it's own, feels like it also basically "reset" our skills in something we're passionate about
3. When you get cravings, what are some good things to do to ride it out? I don't want to just instinctually smoke cigarettes when I get cravings, because I feel like that would just be a really quick way to associate cravings with cigarettes instead, and like I said the end-goal is to kick that too.
4. This question is more for me than for me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend seems unwilling or maybe unable to see that smoking in general is really really bad. She seems to shield herself by telling herself she's way too young for smoking to affect her badly. I don't know how to handle this. I care about her health and safety, but I understand I can't just tell her "you need to quit". These kinds of decisions have to come from within, not from being convinced, or at least, my former alcoholic stepfather told me as much. I know it's her choice to smoke, but I also feels like she's heavily in denial about how bad it is, and seems to have the stance of "well I want to smoke and I enjoy smoking, so I'm going to keep doing it". I can't help but worry however, not just for her, but (selfish as it makes me feel) for myself too. To tell the truth, I kicked both weed and smoking before. At first the smell of cigarettes was almost unbearably tempting, and after a period of time, it became unbearably horrible. I don't know why, but when I quit for a while it was like cigarette smoke was the worst thing I had ever smelled. I don't like the prospect of either of these things. I don't want to start associating the scent of my girlfriend with either my bad habbits, nor with disgust. I have no idea how to handle this thing in particular and it's one of the biggest reasons I'm still smoking to begin with.
5. What are some other general tips you all have for us? I'm willing to take any advice, even if it's a bit harsh. My health and mind are important to me, and my girlfriends' doubly so.

I'm really sorry this post is so wordy. The words just kind of poured out of me, and I'm generally not know to be good at summarizing my thoughts on paper. If you even made it here, even if you have no advice for me, I want to thank you for at least listening.

used coke IV. my chest still hurts and even still I'm going to keep using for a little while. I don't know why. I posted here and everybody was so supportive. I feel ashamed for getting back here. I'm scared this shit is gonna kill me but at the same time I can't seem to stop myself. I know what to do, I'm just not doing it. I don't want to deal with withdrawals again. the last time I used like this it gave me seizures.

my veins were just healing from me collapsing them. my arm hurts to bend and I was so nervous I missed the shot the first time. I'm turning 19 next month and I would like to be doing a little better by then.

I feel so bad rn, I can't even cry, and idk how to say goodbye.
I’m about to go through some pretty rough opioid withdrawal, and honestly, I’m scared. I don’t feel ready.
I’ve also been off meth for a week, but today I was going to buy again and ended up getting my money stolen. I was already feeling low, and that just made everything feel worse.
So I’m trying to put together a playlist to get me through this. I’d love some sad songs I can cry to, or comforting ones that feel like someone understands. And songs that make you feel a little stronger, like maybe you really can get through this and feel okay again.
What did you listen to during withdrawal or early recovery? If there’s a song you kept replaying because it helped you keep going, please share it. I could really use that right now.
If you have non-music resources or supportive suggestions for getting through withdrawal safely, please share those too.

This is research. Are you a long term cocaine user (years of use)? Of course we become paranoid while high, but have you noticed paranoia increased, even in moments of sobriety, compared to when you weren't a user?

I'm two weeks out from being a year clean from coke, which is by far the longest I have ever been in the last seven years. I haven't had any urges or noticeable triggers for months, up until I realized how close I was to a year and now it is all I can think about. I've already had a lapse with alcohol over it and I'm a little scared at how strong the urge to get high is again. I feel this thread trying to pull me back even though I don't want anything to do with drugs anymore, and yet theres a part of me that wants nothing more than to be back on a club dancefloor.

It doesn't help at all that my sobriety date is also the exact date of my best friends overdose. It'll be eight months that he's been gone when I hit a year, if I manage to get past these triggers and grief.

I'm sure I can wager a guess at why its so hard so suddenly, but its still frustrating and super concerning.

Today I consumed methamphetamine hydroxyzine and dextromethorphan in a span of an hour

Although I'm hallucinating and I'm confused asf I feel normal yk, but google keeps saying that I'm going to die and that's kinda ruining my trip

so i've been smoking pretty much nightly for the past 3 years. i just started my masters degree at a pretty good school, decided i should maybe finally man up and do something about my life. for context im pretty miserable lol

im on day 6 and, well as i said, its both better and worse than i thought.

better because: the only cravings i get are whenever i drive past some dudes smoking on the street and i get a whiff. one of the most enabling parts of the addiction is how accessible weed is in my area, i can go on a 10 minute walk and buy some mid bud. whenever im going back home in the evening im still in the mindset of "oh i dont have any bud, what am i gonna roll up the moment i take my shoes off?" but then i remember that i'm this far already and that the longest voluntary weed break since i turned 18 lasted a week so i might beat my high score.

worse because: i deadass cannot sleep at night. i was basically smoking myself retarded every night to pass out in bed for the past 3 years, and im just now realizing how bad it really was. first couple days i was helping myself with some beers as a temporary supplement substance before sleep, now im trynna cut down on that too. also im trynna not doomscroll so much, also in bed, but i realize that this is wayy harder than i thought it would be.

2 days ago i fell asleep at 5, yesterday i just put down my phone and was lying down alone with my thoughts for an hour plus but i still managed to fall asleep so that's something. i either have very out of pocket dreams or no dreams at all, no telling. still i'm not as irritable as i thought i'd be, but maybe that's because im not quitting nicotine yet.

also i have my first set of exams coming up in my master's degree and im actually fucked. three difficult exams + i took on myself an extra set of responsibilities i have to manage, which im not doing very good job at. maybe if i was studying daily then i wouldnt be in this predicament, but im gonna blame my weed addiction on that too. sure i've been in this similar situations countless times before and i was still passing exams while smoking myself retarded every night, but this is just too much right now. found out my dad has cancer too, 99% sure he's gonna be fine tho but it still fucks you up yk

idk i just had to vent, im having a bit of a hard time but im gaslighting myself into thinking theres gonna be an upside to this. maybe i was just expecting my life to magically fall into place the moment i put away the devils lettuce, fuck maybe even a big-assed latina down bad for drug addicts with deltarune humor would knock on my front door, but its just not happening yet.