r/AntiJokes • u/TheKingAintCoverdInS • 4h ago
Geography If New Mexico becomes New America, what does INDIAna become?
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Release the Epstein files. đ
r/AntiJokes • u/AutoModerator • Nov 06 '25
New Rule: No Politics
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r/AntiJokes is no longer allowing posts or comments about politics. Even if you are just using a politician's name, it will be removed. This is because everything a politician does is a joke.
r/AntiJokes • u/gracius0ne • 14h ago
âThe best part of waking upâŚâ
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is getting visual confirmation that your brother didnât get kidnapped amidst the ongoing political unrest in West Africa.
r/AntiJokes • u/yurst254 • 5h ago
unemployed, immediate joiner. immediate next to quick-fast-glue.
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r/AntiJokes • u/Bitter_Reference2204 • 1d ago
Could you imagine?
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Why does anyone even need to know why the chicken crossed the road?
r/AntiJokes • u/MerryRunaround • 1d ago
A strange occurance at a bar
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Aunt Jemimah, Auntie Anne, and Aunt Millie went out for a drink.
r/AntiJokes • u/ImVerySmartAndCool • 1d ago
What did the gay black man say to the trans Jew?
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hi
r/AntiJokes • u/No-Hawk-2488 • 21h ago
I don't get why women expect Patrick Clancy to remember what happened 3 years ago perfectly
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Most of them can't tell their doctor when was the first day of their last period without looking at their phones
r/AntiJokes • u/Professional-Car1607 • 1d ago
What did jesus say when he was attacked? Dont make me use my (nun) chucks
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Get it? Nun?
r/AntiJokes • u/Decobunny3 • 2d ago
Coin flip
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A mathematician and an engineer found a coin and flipped it 100 times and 99 times it came up heads.
The engineer asked âWhatâs the chance the next flip itâll be heads?â
The mathematician said âYou donât fool me! Luck has no memory! Itâs 50:50 heads or tails.â
The engineer said âNawwww. 99 to 1 heads. That coin ainât fair by a long shot.
r/AntiJokes • u/dantendo664 • 3d ago
A polar bear and a penguin are sitting together on a small, drifting iceberg.
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The penguin turns to the polar bear and says, "You know, I've always wondered ..." âThe polar bear immediately lunges forward and mauls the penguin to death. It is an apex predator, and it is starving. âFurthermore, this entire scenario is geographically impossible. Polar bears inhabit the Arctic circle in the Northern Hemisphere, while penguins are native to the Antarctic in the Southern Hemisphere. Therefore, the only logical explanation for them being on the exact same iceberg is a catastrophic failure of the global ecosystem or a severe, poorly managed zoo enclosure breach, neither of which is a laughing matter.
r/AntiJokes • u/ilikesidehugs • 3d ago
After my dadâs accident, we anxiously waited for news until the surgeon finally came out. He put his hand on my shoulder and said, âI want you to know we did everything we couldâŚâ
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âFortunately, that saved his life, and heâs going to be fine.â
r/AntiJokes • u/rmf1989 • 4d ago
Why is there no toilet paper in the toilets at KFC?
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Because they ran out.
r/AntiJokes • u/ImVerySmartAndCool • 4d ago
What do you call a cow with no legs? NSFW
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fuck you
r/AntiJokes • u/ilikesidehugs • 6d ago
Why did the little girl agree with the man to get into his unmarked white van?
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Thatâs her dad.
r/AntiJokes • u/Too_Sweet_And_Desist • 7d ago
White Cows and Black Cows
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A reporter went to interview a cow farmer.
The reporter asked the farmer: "Your cows are very fat and healthy, what do you feed them?"
The farmer replied: "You mean the white ones or the black ones?"
The reporter replied: "I guess, the white ones."
The farmer answered: "Well the white ones eat grass."
The reporter continued: "What about the black ones?"
The farmer answered: "The black ones also eat grass!"
The reporter is a little confused now
He asked another question: "How much milk do they produce per day?"
The farmer replied: "You mean the white ones or the black ones?"
The reporter replied: "I guess, the white ones again."
The farmer answered: "Ok, the white ones produce about 20 litres of milk per day."
The reporter asked again: "What about the black ones?"
The farmer replied: "The black ones also produce about 20 litres of milk per day!"
Now the reporter is really confused
He asked: "Why do you need me to clarify white ones or black ones everytime?"
The farmer answered: "Well, it's because the white ones are mine."
The reporter asked: "Oh, so what about the black ones?"
The farmer replied: "The black ones are also mine!"
r/AntiJokes • u/__plutostudio__ • 8d ago
what is the difference between my to-do list and the ocean?
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one of them is a list of things i have to do this week. the other is a large body of salt water
r/AntiJokes • u/Macdaddy357 • 8d ago
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink?
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Nothing. He's dead.
r/AntiJokes • u/Macdaddy357 • 8d ago
Yo mama so ugly
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Your father lost his attraction to her, and left.
r/AntiJokes • u/Macdaddy357 • 8d ago
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
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He got run over half way across.
r/AntiJokes • u/U-Might-Wanna • 9d ago
Jim Morrison once said:
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"There are things that are known and things that are unknown and between them are the Doors." However, at a recent electrical convention Todd Gronkowski said, "There are conductors and there are insulators and between them are the semi-conductors." Then a Doors tribute band played "Light My Fire."
r/AntiJokes • u/Intelligent-Honey173 • 10d ago
Why Was 60 Afraid of 70?
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Because 70, 80, 90.